PLANET OF THE APES trailer and New York Gala unveiled

Hey folks, Harry here with a couple reports that have come in from a New York City big Ape Spectacular. Our first report is a bit vague but well, the second linked review of the evening is still more complete. Sounds like some cool stuff went down... If only I had stayed an extra day. Sigh....

Hey Harry,

I surprised not to see anything on the Planet of the Apes (POTA) teaser at the Toy Fair yesterday (Sunday). You may not have gotten them posted, but in case no ones posted...here goes.

There was a screening of the Planet of the Apes teaser at the Toy Fair in NYC yesterday. It was held at the Hammerstein Ballroom (where the night before the post-party for V-Day was held. Parties for vaginas to parties for apes. Gotta love New York.).

At the check-in booth, everyone was given a necklace w/ some abstract ape on the front. So far, no one I've showed it to since has been able to figure out what it is. After checking in you had to wait to take (one of the two) elevators to the 7th floor. I only mention this because that Famka chick from X-Men cut in front of everyone.

Once upstairs you walked through this corrider of waiters in black t-shirts. I'm assuming these were the actors who couldn't get hired as Power Rangers for the Fair. Also, I think was a way to keep everyone away from the bar. The place was crowded when we got there, but we were still able to get seats up front (although on the side).

The place was decorated w/ a bunch of large posters on scaffolding.

A bunch of Fox guys spoke. If I had been the Marketing Guy who used every bad ape pun in the world, I would have said "Foxy" guys...however, I'm not so I won't.

First off was the aforemention Punster. Then the Head of Fox spoke. Neither had much to say, except for all this hype crap: Gonna Rule the Planet, blah, blah... One even said that POTA was the most successful Sci-Fi franchise in history. I guess a little thing like Stars Wars (which is also Fox) slipped his mind (or Star Trek, even). They did say that this one is different: Not planet earth and therefore, no Statue of Liberty.

Then the make-up guy spoke (who's name is TOTALLY slipping my mind & I don't have time to go look it up. Sorry, I know I'm gonna get slammed for that.). He was the only who was actually entertaining. He said that "POTA was the reason he was put on this planet." They did mention that he would be demonstrating the make-up at the Hasbro showroom today.

Finally, they showed the teaser. Let me say, overall it was pretty exciting. Darker looking than the first, but all this is to be expected (i.e. Tim Burton). It starts w/ Mark Walhberg escaping from (I'm assuming) a space capsul underwater. It seemed like a lot of the early stuff is in a Yoda-esqe jungle. RULE. You get desert stuff. THE. Various apes. PLANET. That kinda thing. It was a teaser, so all pretty fast cuts flying at you. And the apes fly/leap a lot.

There did seem to be some weird flirting going on by Helena Bonham Carter. I wouldn't be surprised if she & Steve Austin got it on (i.e. Tim Burton). Although, she was the only ape that didn't look good. She looks like Shirley MacLaine in Madame Sousatzka. Not a good sign. And the human girl, who talks this time, looks like some surfer chick.

As far as plot, it seemed like it was fairly similar. Crashes, meets the humans, gets captured, meets the doctor, who helps him escape and although then he leads some sort of human revolt.

I don't know if this making any sense. It was pretty fast. Later they showed some "Dailies," which was basically a rough trailer. So, I may be combining the two.

Overall, I'd relunctly say I'm still psyched. Maybe my hopes were too high? The thing is: I like Tim Burton, but always wish he was a better storyteller. I feel like his visuals are oftentimes replacements for plot. I'm hoping that won't be the case here. I loved the original (I even had the board game as a kid) and I think it's a great story.

Also, Mark Walhberg spoke, looking good in a buzzcut. Said that his only fear (even post Boogie Nights) was filling Charlton Heston's loinclothe.

The topper of the night were the parade of apes. They looked great, but it was a little silly. They came marching out like the Winkies from Wizard of Oz. One even jumped from the balcony (w/ a little help from some wires). Then mixed it up w/ the audience (at least the ones on the aisle, which I wasn't). They kept it pretty dark, but I still think they were pretty impressive.

Sorry, if I'm rushing here. I'm late to meet friends for Hannibal (See, not everyone saw it this weekend).

Like I said, I'm still psyched. It should be huge. Let's just hope it's also good. I'll be clutching my lil' monkey pendant, looking forward to July 27 - unless you (or one of your minions) tell me before hand that it sucks.

And here's that link I promised ya!