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A look at FREDDY GOT FINGERED... gulp...

Hey folks, Harry here... I received some other emails regarding this screening of FREDDY GOT FINGERED, with one that was quite short that basically said that they saw Tom Green come in, and that he was cackling while about 30% of the audience got up and left their seats throughout the movie. Now... Being familiar with Tom Green and his show... Well, the mind boggles at what he would force an entire audience to sit through when left to his own devices. The scene where he apparently masturbates a horse cock on camera... well, I can't wait to watch an audience watch that. (And yes, I know he has a face of milk from a cow below, but another reader told me he goes from that... to the animal behind him.... SEE THE HORSE?) Alright Here ya go... Now remember, at the same time this guy was leaving, someone else was cracking a rib over how beautiful it was that he left (ok... perhaps only Tom Green, but... hey he's someone... right?)







Harry,

Caught a test screening of Freddy Got Fingered tonight, and since I walked out of it after an hour, I don't know if this is a valid review. But I am now on a quest to make sure that every movie-going person I meet does not give a single cent to this superlatively bad movie -- non-disclosure agreements be damned!

I wish I could give a description of the plot, but even after an hour, I was hard-pressed to find one. Tom Green plays Gordy, who basically drifts from one scene to the next. That's about all I can say about "story." Oh yeah, Rip Torn and Julie Haggerty play his parents, both looking extremely embarrassed to be in the movie. A great deal of money could have been saved if the movie was shot with Tom Green and a bunch of cardboard cutouts for the rest of the cast. Finch from American Pie played the titular character, and we only saw him two scenes in the time we stayed. The movie was just a series of bits...no wait, jokes...no wait, gross punch lines. Funny? No. My friend and I only laughed at one scene, and that was a mildly clever spoof of Apocalypse Now, yet even that scene went on way too long. And we seemed to be the only one laughing at that.

Never have I thought any humor was beneath me, yet even I was offended by a few scenes in this flick. I love vulgar humor -- Something About Mary, South Park, Me Myself & Irene, Dumb and Dumber, etc... But Tom Green swinging a newborn around the room by its umbilical cord was a little too much. But hell, I'll be surprised if that scene makes it past the MPAA.

And in today's overly PC world, I welcome some jabs here n' there at certain groups (for example Something About Mary, which still showed some sensitivity) but the 'jokes' aimed at one of the characters in a wheelchair were offensive enough to make my friend want to commit an act of violence if he ever meets Tom Green on the street. I can't say I disagree too much.

Even Deuce Bigalow was sensitive towards the handicapped while still making jokes about them. And let me repeat, I am a guy who used to think he couldn't be offended by anything.

So to sum up...SAVE YOUR FUCKING MONEY!!! YOUR VALUABLE TIME!!! DO NOT SEE FREDDY GOT FINGERED!!! NOT EVEN OUT OF CURIOSITY!!! Yes, it is that bad.

I hate it here.

--Spider Jerusalem






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