
Welcome to the darker side of AICN! Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. Before we head into this week’s reviews, I wanted to let folks know about my own new website MLMillerWrites.com, which will serve as both an archive for my thousands of horror movie reviews as well as updates on my own upcoming comic book projects. I’m just beginning the archive, but it will be a one stop shop for all of my reviews all categorized and lumped in one place. So zip over to MLMillerWrites.com and let me know what you think of it!
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On with the horror reviews!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
SHARKANSAS WOMEN’S PRISON (2016)
THE OFFERING (2016)
RESTORATION
THE HORDE (2016)
SHE KILLS (2015)
SUBMERGED (2015)
THE HAUNTING OF ALICE D (2013)
EMELIE (2015)
BITE (2015)
SCHERZO DIABOLICO (2015)
Advance Review: UNEARTHED & UNTOLD: THE PATH TO PET SEMATARY Documentary (2016)
And finally…”Light’s Out: He Dug It Up!”

SHARKANSAS WOMEN’S PRISON MASSACRE (2016)
Directed by Jim WynorskiWritten by William Dever, Corey Landis, Jim Wynorski
Starring Dominique Swain, Traci Lords, Christine Nguyen, Cindy Lucas, John Archer Lundgren, Corey Landis, Amy Holt, John Callahan, Skye McDonald, Serafin Falcon, Oscar DeRosa, Chris De Christopher, Steve Goldenberg, Tabitha Marie
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
There are times when brainless fun is just the amount of entertainment I need in a film, and times when the film snob in me just gets annoyed that stuff like SHARKANSAS WOMEN’S PRISON MASSACRE has been made. I’m sure there are plenty of films in Hollywood on the back burner or in limbo that are ten times the film this one is, but then again, if you’re looking to zone out and watch horrible CG devour horrible actors, then this is just the film you’ll be looking for.

The main problem with this film is that it fills its ranks with Z-list celebrities and Skinemax actresses and seems to want to pay homage to those women in prison grindhouse flicks, but it forgets to go the distance and actually deliver on any T&A. So you have porn stars bounding about trying (and failing) to get their Oscars, you have lesbians breaking other lesbians out of prison and hunky scientists falling for some of the inmates, yet not a shred of clothing is shed.
Had this film gone for the gold and delivered on some skin, I would have forgiven it for the awful acting and CG sharks. But because it tries to go out of its comfort range and be something it’s not, the film fails miserably. The one exception is soft core porn actress Christine Nguyen, who if you have any premium cable channel you will have seen a lot of her in after hours flicks too numerous to mention, who actually delivers a solid performance. This is with actual actors like Traci Lords and Dominique Swain sleeping through their performances. It’s possible Nguyen actually might have a career outside of the biz, but she remains the only bright spot in this otherwise lame SyFy monster mash we are all way too sick of by now.

THE OFFERING (2016)
aka THE FAITH OF ANNA WATERSDirected by Kelvin Tong
Written by Kelvin Tong
Starring Matthew Settle, Elizabeth Rice, Pamelyn Chee, Elizabeth Lazan, Jaymee Ong, Adina Herz, Kheng Hua Tan, Adrian Pang, Colin Borgonon, Rayann Condy, Shane Mardjuki, Crispian Chan, Marcus Mok, Victoria Mintey, Ravi Chandran, Gus Donald
Find out more about this film on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
A handful of effective scares and thrills are hidden within this rather convoluted tale of curses, disease, ghosts, possession, and resurrection.
Suffering from Huntington’s Disease, Jamie (Elizabeth Rice) is shocked to hear about the sudden death of her older sister Anna (Rayann Condy) living in Singapore and immediately flies out to find out what happened in the days leading up to her death. Anna suffered from Huntington’s as well, as does her daughter Katie (Adina Herz). Packing up her sister’s things and trying to help Katie cope with the loss of her mom, Jamie uncovers an ancient curse that may have something to do with the death of her sister, making her susceptible to the curse herself.

That said, THE OFFERING does excel in setting up some great scares such as a moving telescope which taunts one of the actors to look through it. It’s this type of scare that makes me think some real thought and effort went into making this, as there are some interesting themes going on about the Tower of Babel and a curse that promises a cure and a resurrection after seven days. Yes, this again feels lifted from J-horror films like THE GRUDGE and THE RING, but the way the film presents its main conflict--that of a group of people who will stop at nothing to find a cure for a disease they have--is a winner. The whole thing, though, gets bogged down with possession/haunting mumbo-jumbo and never lets that winning concept shine through.

RESTORATION (2016)
Directed by Zack WardWritten by Zack Ward & James Cullen Bressack
Starring Emily Roya O'Brien, Adrian Gaeta, Zack Ward, Sarah Ann Schultz, Anna Harr, Nick Principe, Kirsty Hill, Keith Jardine, Kevin Porter, Pilar Schneider, Pam Hyatt
Find out more about this film here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
Though he probably hates bringing it up, Zack Ward is probably best known from his iconic role of Scut Farkus, the yellow-eyed bully from A CHRISTMAS STORY, but he also seems to be an appreciator of horror these days. He starred in and produced the pretty awesome DON’T BLINK which was released last year, and co-wrote and directed the subject to of this review, RESTORATION, which despite some pacing issues contains some promise that possibly one day Ward might get out from other his childhood role’s shadow.

While folks are tired of the found footage and zombie films, I think it’s important to note that one of the most overplayed concepts in horror (other than the cabin in the woods scenario) is the “couple buys a new home to find it is haunted/possessed or the site of a grisly murder/alien abduction/cult ritual/underground Teletubby counterfeit ring” scenario. That said, despite the overdone concept, Ward and Bressack do a good job at building the tension and making the payoff resonant in this film. While some of the twists are pretty obvious from the get go, Ward makes everything pretty interesting with some creative tweaks which seem to indicate Ward is a director with promise. This is a low budget film, but Ward works well within those limits and is able to give the film a creative opener and quite a few scenes of high suspense.
So if you can run with a concept that seems like a broken record, some solid performances and some slick filmmaking are to be expected from RESTORATION.

THE HORDE (2016)
Directed by Jared CohnWritten by Paul Logan
Starring Paul Logan, Matthew Willig, Bill Moseley, Vernon Wells, Costas Mandylor, Nestor Serrano, Sydney Sweeney, Tiffany Brouwer, Nils Allen Stewart, Jonathan Erickson Eisley, Bobby C. King, John Omohundro, Elisabeth Ferrara, Zac Goodspeed, Frankie Ray, Steven Lambert, Thomas Ochoa, Amanda Godepski, Devin Reeve, Jos Deacon, Jeffrey Damnit, John J. Tierney, Zahra Susan Ingersoll, Jack David Frank, Cory Fisher, Eddie Aguglia, Cyle Conway, Belinda Cussins
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
THE HORDE isn’t a terrible mix of action and horror, pitting an ex-Navy SEAL against a group of mutants in the woods. While it views as a bare bones THE HILL HAVE EYES riff, the gore and action make up for the parts that feel a bit too familiar.

It’s obvious writer Logan and director Jared Cohn (who directed LITTLE DEAD ROTTING HOOD) were looking to make an action/horror vehicle to launch some kind of action star career for Logan al la Van Damme, Lundgren, and Jeff Speakman from the 80s. The problem is that it’s not the 80s anymore, yet this film is written like it is as it features the lead only in a completely positive light, being the noble ex-Navy SEAL, the sensitive lover, yet still the deadly killing machine who breaks limbs and ends lives without mercy. Had this film any depth, it would have gone into the shock his bride to be might have experienced seeing her sensitive lover ripping off arms and shooting flaming arrows through people with no remorse, but because Logan is the unabashed hero here, never is her seen as anything but the peak of perfection. Entering the film shirtless and cut all to hell, Logan clearly takes care of himself, but as a writer he should realize that what makes us interesting is our flaws, not a sterling outer shell.

On the surface level, there are things to like about THE HORDE. The gore is pretty intense, as is the violence. Vernon Wells by far gets the most intense scene as he delivers a monologue about tasting fear in the meat he cuts from his victims, and a film focusing solely on him would be miles better than what we got. But to me, a little too much was put in this film to make a career rather than focusing on making this an original and interesting story. Other things of note: though he is given top billing, Bill Moseley is only in this for about four minutes and there’s an inexplicable cameo by Don “The Dragon” Wilson that, for me, is the best part of the film. The action is fun if you like seeing overly buff guys kicking, punching, shooting arrows, and snapping necks, but if you’re looking for anything deeper, this one doesn’t deliver.

SHE KILLS (2015)
Directed by Ron BonkWritten by Ron Bonk
Starring Jennie Russo, Trey Harrison, Michael Merchant, Jody Pucello, David Royal, Martha Zemsta
Find out more about this film here, on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
SHE KILLS lets you know it is something extremely unconventional as Sadie (Jennie Russo) walks though a lovely field of wildflowers set to sweeping piano music. As she comes to rest on a grassy spot, she opens her blouse and tickles her nipple with a flower as a biker punk wearing a leather jacket with “The Touchers” painted across the back watches intently and licks his lips. Right off the bat, the film lets you know that it is not your typical movie. SHE KILLS is raunchy, gory, and altogether wrong in so many ways. It’s also a pretty damn good time.

Sadie is a virginal young woman, looking forward to marrying her fiancée and starting a family, but on her wedding night, a ruthless gang named “The Touchers” murder her husband and as they attempt to rape Sadie, one whiff from her crotch whips them into an uncontrollable rage. The Touchers wake up the next morning to find out that they ate her husband and that Sadie’s honeypot has the power to drive people mad. Vowing revenge against the Touchers, Sadie goes to a mystic who says she is cursed with “the fire crotch” and that Sadie can have her revenge, though she can never be with a man again. The spell is performed and Sadie busts out to unleash some vaginal revenge on her tormentors.

Balls are kicked so hard they are coughed up. Much 70’s bush is unleashed. People are dry humped to death. And you will believe a vagina will eat a human being. These are but a few of the horrifically wrong things that happen in SHE KILLS, a film made for a particular gore-minded folks who laugh uncontrollably at times when one is supposed to be offended. The cast and filmmakers of this film committed to make something truly disgusting and juvenile and they succeeded in spades. If you’re a fan of Troma films, SHE KILLS is going to be your flavor, guaranteed.

SUBMERGED (2015)
aka THE SPACE BETWEENDirected by Steven C. Miller
Written by Scott Milam
Starring Rosa Salazar, Talulah Riley, Jonathan Bennett, Tim Daly, Cody Christian, Mario Van Peebles, Samuel C. Hunt, Willa Ford, Denzel Whitaker, Sam Daly, Giles Matthey, Mario Perez
Find out more about this film on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
The strongest parts of SUBMERGED pay homage to the old Hitchcockian single locale thrillers of old. A group of young good-lookings wake up trapped in a sealed limousine at the bottom of a body of water. Opening with this scenario, you are immediately asking questions like “How did these guys get here?”, “Who are they?” and “How do they get the hell out of this?” All will be answered in Steven C. Miller’s new thriller.

The film is not entirely set inside the car, and I think that’s the only thing that bothered me about this film. I think that it would have been stronger had this been more in the car and less outside of it telling the tale of how this group of kids ended up in there. Sure some flashbacks are necessary, but I think a stronger script could have made this a really awesome locked room mystery. The cramped locale is what makes this film unique. I just wish there was more time spent there.

The tension conveyed in SUBMERGED is good, as Miller’s attention to how he moves the camera can elicit a feeling of unease and thrill for the viewer. More of a crime thriller than a straight up horror film, the claustrophobia and terror of being trapped underwater are communicated well in this film. So while the cast might bog the film down at times and I think that it was a mistake to have so much outside of the limo, if you appreciate a strong directorial eye, you’re going to find something to appreciate here.

THE HAUNTING OF ALICE D (2013)
aka TAINTED, ALICE DDirected by Jessica Sonneborn
Written by Jessica Sonneborn
Starring Kristina Page, Megan Hensley, Aaron Massey, Kane Hodder, Michael Reed, Juan Riedinger, Al Snow, Jessica Sonneborn, Eliza Swenson, Josh Hammond, Julianne Tura, Chanel Ryan, Sarah Nicklin, Barry Ratcliffe, Kaylee Signore
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
Cruel and unpredictable are two qualifiers I’d use to describe ALICE D, a twisted haunted house tale that defies convention and ends up being a pretty damn effective spookfest.

While this film is riddled with clichés involving partying kids hanging out in an old house with a dark history, I couldn’t help but love this film because it adheres to a well-trod path and is still able to pull of some absolutely terrifying scenes of bloody horror. There were scenes in this film that were timed to such terrifying perfection that I was in downright awe at how palpably scary it all is. Simple CG, some effective practical effects, and some on the nose suspenseful direction really does make the last act of ALICE D one of the more effective haunted house flicks I’ve experienced in a while.

Still, that ending delivers in spades and I found myself completely unnerved by the end of ALICE D. Writer/director Jessica Sonneborn definitely has a gift for building suspense, but more admirably, she delivers the knockout shock as well, which most directors these days forget to do. So while there are a lot of typicalities to ALICE D, the shocks and horrors in the latter portion make this haunted house flick much more effective than most.

EMELIE (2015)
Directed by Michael ThelinWritten by Richard Raymond Harry Herbeck & Michael Thelin
Starring Sarah Bolger, Chris Beetem, Susan Pourfar, Joshua Rush, Carly Adams, Thomas Bair, Dante Hoagland, Elizabeth Jayne, Randi Langdon
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
A few narrative missteps keep EMELIE from being an absolutely perfect thriller, but even with those stumbles, it’s a damn fine piece of squirm-inducing cinema!

Despite a few logical stumbles, I loved this film. Sarah Bolger is amazing as the worst babysitter you could ever imagine, putting the children on the frontline of danger as well as having devious intentions for them. Seeing Emelie take great pleasure in seeing the children acting out, doing things they shouldn’t, and abusing them in cringe-worthy ways is something that will definitely cause unease in those with or without children. EMELIE goes there in terms of pushing the taboo subject matter in the abuse Emelie unleashes upon the young children in her care. And while the scenes where one of the kid’s pets is given to another pet to eat is something that made me squirm beyond belief, I have to give this film credit for going to places that most are afraid to dare. The videotape scene alone is enough to unsettle most folks, but the fact that Emelie seems to get off on psychologically torturing those she is looking after makes the film ballsy enough to surprise me at how ballsy the film truly is.

But despite this one flaw, this is a damn suspenseful, completely unnerving, and totally wicked little film that I loved quite a bit. Sarah Bolger delivers a star-making turn as the evil nanny and the child actors are actually really good, as director Michael Thelin really gets some realistic performances out of them. EMELIE goes to dark places, and you’re definitely going to be made to feel uncomfortable in a scene or two as this babysitter makes you never want to leave your kids with anyone ever again. I’m willing to look past some of the late in the game decisions of the film due to the quality of the performances and the sheer size of balls this film has. EMELIE is a film I definitely recommend to lovers of tense, wicked, real life horror.

BITE (2015)
Directed by Chad ArchibaldWritten by Chad Archibald, Jayme Laforest
Starring Elma Begovic, Annette Wozniak, Jordan Gray, Lawrene Denkers, Denise Yuen, Tianna Nori, Barry Birnberg
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
The structure of BITE is a familiar one, reminding me of body horror films of note over the last few years (CONTRACTED and THANATOMORPHOSE, to be precise), but the insectoid lens in which this film is cast through makes it feel more akin with Cronenberg’s THE FLY than anything else. This is good company to be in as all of these films made me squiggle and squirm. BITE will make you feel that way too, I guarantee it.

As with THANATOMORPHOSE and CONTRACTED, the message here is, quite plainly, unprotected and reckless sex will kill you. All three films play with the metaphor of the horror of picking up an STD from a one night stand and what that does to a woman, her relationships, and her life. Not only is there a physical transformation, but there’s also the shame in receiving this disease that hurts and looks horrible, making you feel like a monster. It’s a metaphor that is ripe with potential and just as THE FLY did this with cancer, BITE does the same for STD’s as Casey is guilt-ridden first at what she did behind Jared’s back, but instead of telling him, she decides to keep it a secret. Later, the inner guilt evolves into Casey literally turning into a monster and makes her adulterous behavior impossible to hide for long. While the metaphor isn’t subtle, it speaks volumes and makes for some fantastic moments throughout the film that end up being very real, despite the fact that Casey is turning into a giant bug monster.

Begovic does a fantastic job of convincingly turning from a beautiful guilt-ridden girl who made a mistake to a cold-blooded monster by the final act. Every step of the way she straddles the line of being both sympathetic and menacing. Director Chad Archibald continues to evolve in a positive direction as a filmmaker. While I found flaws in his last two films (THE DROWNSMAN and EJECTA), there is an undeniable talent to both films and I feel it has come together much more successfully in BITE by telling a simple allegory focusing on a common predicament and taking it to monstrous proportions. BITE is disgusting, depraved, disturbing, and diabolical…in a way that will please gore-appreciative horror fans in the fullest!

SCHERZO DIABOLICO (2015)
Directed by Adrián García BoglianoWritten by Adrián García Bogliano
Starring Francisco Barreiro, Daniela Soto Vell, Jorge Molina, Milena Pezzi, Vita Vargas, Evan Alducin, Pau Alva, Tito Guillén, Pablo Guisa Koestinger
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
I tend to pay close attention when I hear Adrián García Bogliano is connected to a project. Every one of his past films have been something astounding and unlike most of what you see out there right now in the horror world. Films like the creepy PENUMBRA (reviewed here), the kinetic COLD SWEAT (reviewed here), and the truly spellbinding HERE COMES THE DEVIL (reviewed here) all stand as distinct, yet all bear the same odd sense of surreal horror that Bogliano excels in. His latest, SCHERZO DIABOLICO is probably his most subtle of his films, but still it packs quite a powerful punch in the latter half.

Like much of Bogliano’s work, SCHERZO DIABOLICO is a film that relies on sound quite a bit for its more powerful moments. Bolgliano does some fantastic things with simple classical music here that proves he really is a master at his craft. Having a beautiful piano concerto morph into a hard rock concert when it is heard by the right ears offers up a glimpse into a warped mind like never before shown on film. The film uses an awful lot of quick cuts and edits set to classical music making it a film that assaults both the eyes and ears in equal capacity. Bogliano did this masterfully in COLD SWEAT and uses this zooming in and overlapping of sound just as well in this film as well to make everything seem to happen in a world that is bathed in music and actions made more resonant with music attached to it.

SCHERZO DIABOLICO is a taut little thriller that definitely has you by the short hairs early on and doesn’t let go. While it takes it time for the payoff, Bogliano makes every step of the way look and sound interesting. The film isn’t as unpredictable as Bogliano’s previous films, but still is rock solidly made. The gonzo ending is filled with all kinds of shocking acts and gore never feels as if it is a broad leap in tone because from the get-go this is a plan that is destined to fail. Seeing it and especially hearing it happen is what makes SCHERZO DIABOLICO so much fun to watch.


UNEARTHED & UNTOLD: THE PATH TO PET SEMATARY Documentary (2016)
Directed by John Campopiano & Justin WhiteWritten by John Campopiano & Justin White
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
One of Stephen King’s most effective adaptations gets the documentary treatment in UNEARTHED & UNTOLD: THE PATH TO PET SEMATARY; a thorough and entertaining little doc which details the film from initial inception to the last day of filming.

Campopiano and White do a fantastic job of gathering everyone even remotely involved in the making of PET SEMATARY. Everyone from the gal who built the elaborate children’s pet cemetery and the Micmac burial ground to the extra who played the truck driver who runs down Gage is interviewed and it paints an elaborate tapestry of what it was like to work on this film. King himself worked hard to make this film in his home state of Maine, so many of the cast and crew were locals who still live in the area, so it seemed like it was easy to go back to the locations and find those with stories of the shoot. Another interesting aspect of this film is that it revisits those locales, which still look familiar all these years later.

The filmmakers were able to get everyone involved in the film, except for Gwynn and King himself (though some interviews of King are referred to). It was nice to see Lambert look back on her first feature film as well as actors Dale Midkiff and Denise Crosby look back on how it affected their lives. It was even more fun seeing the child actors who played Gage (Miko Hughes) and the twins playing Ellie (Blaze and Beau Berdahl) looking back on their performances and what they did and didn’t know about the film as child actors protected from the more intense bits of the film.
If there’s a criticism to be made about UNEARTHED & UNTOLD, it is that this is obviously a doc told from undeniable fans of the film. It is definitely more of a celebration of the film than an objective take on it, so much of the not-so-successful moments of the film and any other critical thinking applied to the actual film itself are glossed over. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it definitely isn’t very objective in its approach. Still, UNEARTHED & UNTOLD is a doc I would recommend to any fan of the original film (and who isn’t a fan, really?). It’s a remarkable tribute to a thoroughly effective story of life, death, and beyond with some of the more grueling moments in modern horror.
And finally…here’s another grave tale from the old timey radio series “Light’s Out” called “He Dug It Up!” Turn out the lights, hunker down in front of the speaker, and listen to tonight’s tale!
See ya next week, folks!
Ambush Bug is Mark L. Miller, original @$$Hole/wordslinger/writer of wrongs/reviewer/interviewer/editor of AICN COMICS for over 15 years & AICN HORROR for 5. Follow Mark on the Twitters @Mark_L_Miller and on his new website collecting posts for AICN HORROR as well as all of the most recent updates on his various comic book projects on MLMillerWrites.com.
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