
Welcome to the darker side of AICN! Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. This week is a good week to be a horror fan with a lot of great terrors to enjoy! But first…
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On with the horror reviews!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
Retro-review: JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET (1962)
AMITYVILLE: VANISHING POINT (2016)
THE HOARDER (2015)
#HORROR (2015)
CHERRY TREE (2015)
THE DEAD ROOM (2015)
DECAY (2015)
THE HALLOW (2015)
Advance Review: GREEN ROOM (2015)
And finally…HORROR BIZARRE’s HOW WILL I DIE?!


JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET (1962)
Directed by Sidney W. PinkWritten by Sidney W. Pink (original story & screenplay), Ib Melchior (screenplay)
Starring John Agar, Greta Thyssen, Carl Ottosen, Peter Monch, Ove Sprogøe, Louis Miehe-Renard, Ann Smyrner, Ulla Moritz, Mimi Heinrich, Annie Birgit Garde, Bente Juel
Retro-reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
I want you all to sit back and imagine far into the distant future to the year 2001, where man has conquered space travel and learned to live peacefully with one another. I love it when reality disappoints the expectations of the past’s future. This is the setting for JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET, a truly goofy, but fun sci fi yarn.

Start to finish, JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET is goofy sci fi done right. It’s late-night or mid-afternoon future goodness with whistling creepy music as astronauts in brightly colored spacesuits venture through alien terrain and shoot tiny, whispering lasers at anything that moves. Very little of the science is thought out because, you know, it’s the future and there’s no need to explain stuff. The ending is especially vague, almost as if they simply ran out of film, so they decided to toss in animation and a song to cover it up. Even the theme song, entitled coincidentally JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET is filled with hokey awesomeness in every note Otto Brandenburg belts out. Check it out below if you don’t believe me.

The effects in this film are impressive as well with a Harryhausen-esque, stop-motion, one-eyed rat monster attacking the crew, the aforementioned brain creature, and some nice alien scenery popping up later in the film. JOURNEY TO THE 7TH PLANET is a film for those who love sci fi, not matter how hokey it may be. I, most certainly, am one of those people.

AMITYVILLE: VANISHING POINT (2016)
Directed by Dylan GreenbergWritten by Dylan Greenberg (story), Pailer Ezra, Selena Mars, Jurgen Azazel Munster (co-writers)
Starring Selena Mars, Amanda Flowers, Mickala McFarlane, Jurgen Azazel Munster, Sara Kaiser, Max Husten, Zac Amico, Lloyd Kaufman, Victor M. Sheely, Louisa Ashleigh, Lucille Bignom, John P. Brennan, Alyssa Marie C., Dan Correll, Sofe Cote, Dean Dempsey, Neva Gentlman, Alexia Giovanna, Max Gnar, Liz Grayson, Aaden Grushkin, Rose Kaplan, Lucy Love, Lindsay Lowe, Taylor MacLeod, David Marquise, Neon Music, Lys Obsidian, Carl Peckham, Peter Russell, Julia Simonello, Emily Smykal, Rew Starr, Piera Yerkes
Find out more info from the website here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
Being a supporter of independent cinema, I want to encourage 18 year old filmmaker, Dylan Greenberg to keep on developing her own style and keep on telling stories that ring true to her. While there’s a fun, underdeveloped spirit to AMITYVILLE: VANISHING POINT, this isn’t a film that is going to be for a lot of you. It’s rough around the edges, but still, there’s some shining moments that indicate that Greenberg has a future with this filmmaking thing.

AMITYVILLE: VANISHING POINT has very little to do with the AMITYVILLE HORROR series of films apart from taking place in the town of Amityville and somewhat supernatural events that occur in and around a specific home. The locale looks nothing like the famed house with its skull window placings and bleeding pipes. Instead, this film focuses on the group of friends going through the mourning process and finding a way of coming together because of it. Other than name recognition, I really am not sure why this film has the AMITYVILLE moniker. If anything, the ghostly way the music sounds, the sleepy/peculiar way the cast acts, and the non-linear way the story unfolds feels more akin to David Lynch’s TWIN PEAKS than anything else. In fact, quite a bit of this feels like an out and out homage to Lynch’s acclaimed TV series.
As an homage, this film has a lot of bright spots, as it does kind of capture the feel of Lynch’s bizarre world. But this is definitely a rough film. Scenes go on way too long. The film is filled with non-actors. And the dialog is often pretentious and sophomoric attempts to be deep. Those without the stomach for low fi cinema will definitely want to give this a pass, but this is a film worth supporting. AMITYVILLE: VANISHING POINT is a good start for Dylan Greenberg and I hope she uses this first film as a way to see what works and what doesn’t and continues to evolve. She’s accomplished much because, as an 18 year old, I attempted to make my masterpiece on video with all of my friends, but never had my act together to get past the first few scenes and my friends lost interest. Here’s hoping AICN HORROR sees more of Greenberg’s work in the years to come. She’s off to an impressive start.

THE HOARDER (2015)
Directed by Matt WinnWritten by Matt Winn, James Handel, Chris Denne
Starring Mischa Barton, Robert Knepper, Valene Kane, Emily Atack, Charlotte Salt, Andrew Buckley, Ed Cooper Clarke, Jamie Bacon, John Sackville, Philip Philmar, Richard Sumitro
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
I get worked up over a good movie looking forward to talking about what I liked. I get worked up over a bad film to talk about what I would have liked to see or how it could be better. But a film like THE HOARDER feels so by the numbers that no one involved really cared and therefore, why should you and I?

The problem with THE HOARDER is that it feels a few drafts away from something actually well structured and sure sounding. A lot of the dialog is stilted, though the actors are solid (including Barton, Atak, Robert Knepper, and Andrew Buckley), it just feels like no one really believes the lines they are spouting and worse yet, no one really cares to.

I did like the rather ironic ending of the film which really does follow through with something with a little bite, despite the rather toothless pursuit that goes on through most of the film. The staple-mouthed monster is rather unique, but not really practical as it’s not really clear as to how the staples stay so clean despite being pierced through the monsters mouth, much less how the creature eats. But things like that aren’t really thought out and neither was this narrative. So skip THE HOARDER. Despite a cool looking monster, it’s just not worth putting into your collection.

#HORROR (2015)
Directed by Tara SubkoffWritten by Tara Subkoff
Starring Sadie Seelert, Haley Murphy, Bridget McGarry, Blue Lindeberg, Mina Sundwall, Emma Adler, Timothy Hutton, Chloë Sevigny, Stella Schnabel, Balthazar Getty, Annabelle Dexter-Jones, Lydia Hearst, Brenna Perez, Jessica Blank, Natasha Lyonne
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
I found it! #HORROR is THE most annoying film of the year! Just when I thought recent theatrical horror releases were too choppily edited and filled with unrelatable characters you want to see die horribly, this film comes along and ups the ante to the nth degree.

Let me put it this way. Rape/revenge films, to me, are often panned for celebrating the rape by spending the bulk of the time focusing on the rape itself while the revenge portion (which is supposed to be the satisfying bit to soothe you for the horrors you just witnessed by giving the rapist his just desserts) is sort of tacked on at the end. That’s how #HORROR is structured. Though the social mediots do end up gorily disposed of, it only happens in the last twenty minutes and occurs so quickly that it really have no heft or resonance. This is a celebration of social media addicted, not a lesson about the negative aspects of it, just as a lot of those rape/revenge films are a celebration of the act of rape for those who get off on it rather than a cathartic experience to promote overcoming the heinous crime.

The imagery of this film is haunting as the girls dance with adult masks covering their faces and the artwork of this house makes every room a new nightmare. The way Chloë Sevigny is so distracted with her own problems to notice that her daughter and her friends are close to killing one another as well as the fact that she awkwardly acts like one of the twelve year olds is almost as horrifying as Timothy Hutton’s bent performance as an overprotective father. The elements are there, but the problem with #HORROR lays in what it chooses to focus on and what it chooses to neglect until it’s almost way too late to make an impact. #HORROR is annoying and nightmarish because it really does feel like you’re in the head of someone who can’t live without an internet connection. I just wish the filmmaker would have been a little removed enough from the subject matter to make the points she was trying to make.

CHERRY TREE (2015)
Directed by David KeatingWritten by Brendan McCarthy
Starring Naomi Battrick, Patrick Gibson, Anna Walton, Sam Hazeldine, Leah McNamara, Caroline Murphy, Valerie O'Connor, Minnie Phipps, Elva Trill
Find out more about this film here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug

Faith (Naomi Battrick) is a troubled teen. Picked on by her peers in school and plagued with worries about her father who is dying of leukemia, Faith is a powder keg ready to explode. But her new field hockey coach Sissy (Anna Walton) sees potential in the young girl and makes her an offer; become pregnant and give her the baby and Sissy will use witchcraft to heal her father. Faith is desperate and agrees, but given her rebellious nature, she has trouble keeping up her end of the deal. Now Faith is about to have her baby and Sissy expects her to pay up with her baby’s life.


So what about that aspect that kind of ruins things for me about this film? Well, that would be the very last beat of this film. Every plot twist and forward movement was so spot on, pulling me into Faith’s plight completely. But the decision to use bad CG for the final beat of the film (along with a painful one-liner) just kind of leaves you with a bad taste in your mouth. It’s shocking to see the film end on such a bad note, given the high quality of the rest of the film and once you see it, I’m pretty sure you’ll feel the same
Everything up to the last second of this film is pretty great. Battrick and Walton are fantastic. The story really does pull you in. The depiction of witchcraft is tactile and unnerving. And those damn centipedes are nasty as all get out. The final moments of CHERRY TREE don’t ruin the film completely, but it came darn close to doing so for me and it left me wondering who thought it would be a good idea to end the film in such a lame way.

THE DEAD ROOM (2015)
Directed by Jason StutterWritten by Kevin Stevens, Jason Stutter
Starring Jed Brophy, Jeffrey Thomas, Laura Petersen
Find out more info from the website here and on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
There’s not a lot in THE DEAD ROOM we haven’t seen before. In fact, this film feels a lot like a more horror-centric GHOSTBUSTERS without the comedy or the all-star cast. But even though many aspects of this film may seem familiar, it does do these familiar things in an effective and interesting manner.

Unlike most paranormal investigator films, this one is thankfully filmed cinematically rather than through the tired found footage technique. For that alone, I give this film a recommendation for not going the easy route with the material. Still, this film is filled with all sorts of what makes a good paranormal investigation film and not a lot of what shouldn’t be there. The thing that works with this film is that there’s a real mystery going on with the investigators actually trying to solve it through their own know-how, the empirical data they accumulate, and the gut feelings all of them listen to, question, and follow. More so than most paranormal investigator films, this one actually accentuates the investigation part and I love that about this film, as it makes a pretty standard ghost hunting film into an actual story, which so many ghost hunting films tend to leave out.

Writer/director Jason Stutter and his co-writer Kevin Stevens do a really fantastic job of making a thinking man’s ghost hunting film. THE DEAD ROOM is full of surprises and the effects are subtle, but effective. But what stands out the most if the character stuff and the fact that none of this feels formulaic. It’s a film that has been done so many times, it should feel like something tired and worn out, but the acting, the subtle scares and how they intensify, and most importantly the teamwork at play makes THE DEAD ROOM one of the better films about ghost investigation you’re going to bear witness to.

DECAY (2015)
Directed by Joseph WartnerchaneyWritten by Joseph Wartnerchaney
Starring Rob Zabrecky, Lisa Howard, Elisha Yaffe, Jackie Hoffman, Hannah Barron, Reese Ehlinger, Whitney Hayes, Jason Knauf
Find out more about this film here and @decayproject
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Meticulous and engrossing, DECAY is a film that involves some pretty horrific subject matter, but in the end, it perfectly exemplifies in a sometimes gorgeous, sometimes soul-crunching, and sometimes nightmarish manner.

DECAY is an amazing piece of filmmaking. Unfortunately, it deals with a subject matter that is going to turn off many, so a lot of people aren’t going to see this film about a man who falls in love with a corpse. But I’m not even talking about that ghoulish detail. I’m talking about how accurately and fantastically well this film depicts the subject of loneliness. I’m scared of many things; sharks, zombies, rats, bees, being chastised in public, but the number one thing I am afraid of is being alone and worse yet, dying alone. And I think, if you’re honest with yourself, I’m not the only one. By following Jonathan through his controlled and meticulous life, we see what it is like to walk in the shoes off a man who is utterly and entirely alone. Long scenes are pieced together showing the banality of Jonathan going about his life – taking his pills, hanging his found keys, watering his flowers, riding his tricycle (yes, he rides a tricycle) to work. When writer/director Joseph Wartnerchaney adds in the dead body that literally drops onto Jonathan’s doorstep, she just becomes another cog in the continuously but steadily spinning wheel of compulsion that keeps his fragile psyche together. Through repetitive cuts to his daily activities, he maps out the most convincing depiction of loneliness in cinema I’ve seen in quite some time.

Rob Zabrecky is mesmerizing as Jonathan. Seeing his predictable life tossed into chaos with the introduction of this new dead person is engrossing to see unfold. Zabrecky makes you feel for his well being even while doing creepy things. As with MANIAC (and it’s modern remake), he’s the only POV we have here, and though he is uncomfortable with others and creepy as all get out, he still somehow convinced me to root for him because, in the end, he didn’t really do anything wrong (well, at last initially as he didn’t kill the girl, though he does lie to police looking for her body). DECAY deals with tough topics and there is a huge ick factor going on all the way through, but this painstakingly slow illustration of a life alone entranced me with its gorgeous cinematography, engrossing story, and talented star in Zabrecky.

THE HALLOW (2015)
aka THE WOODSDirected by Corin Hardy
Written by Corin Hardy, Felipe Marino
Starring Joseph Mawle, Bojana Novakovic, Michael McElhatton, Michael Smiley, Gary Lydon, Stuart Graham, Conor Craig Stephens, Stephen Cromwell, Charlotte Williams
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
Taking on the same kind of wee beasties Guillermo Del Toro did in DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE DARK?, THE HALLOW handles faeries, banshees, goblins, and other monsters that haunt the European countryside on a level very few monster mashes even hope to achieve.

THE HALLOW is a monster movie, so there are your usual scenes of non-believers beginning to believe when it’s too late. There’s the lead-up to the reveal of the monsters, as they are often obscured in shadows and only revealed in snippets through much of the first half, and then there’s the big standoff against the monsters where the final few somehow are able to fend off the beasts that so quickly disposed of the rest of the cast earlier on in the film. All of these factors are front and present, but what makes THE HALLOW distinct is that between these go-to monster movie beats are quite a few really well orchestrated scare scenes crescendo-ing to an all out battle between the family and an army of monsters from ancient lore. Director Corin Hardy has a fantastic knack for setting up scenes that maximize the chills, utilized over and over in this utterly creepy film.

With a strong story of family sacrifice and loyalty and unique monsters that look fantastic, The cast is great too with HEARTLESS’ Joseph Mawle offering up a sympathetic role, and the beautiful Bojana Novakovic offering up the motherly strength to keep you rooting for the best to happen to this family. THE HOLLOW has faerie tale fantasy elements, but it is most definitely hardcore horror. This is one dark film, filled with moments that are bound to make you tremble and jump al all the right times.


GREEN ROOM (2015)
Directed by Jeremy SaulnierWritten by Jeremy Saulnier
Starring Anton Yelchin, Imogen Poots, Alia Shawkat, Patrick Stewart, Joe Cole, Mark Webber, Callum Turner, Eric Edelstein, Taylor Tunes, Macon Blair, Kai Lennox, October Moore, David W. Thompson, Brent Werzner, Mason Knight, Samuel Summer, Colton Ruscheinsky
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Mark L. Miller aka Ambush Bug
I have witnessed one of the most intense cinematic experiences this year and it comes from the director who brought us one of the most intense films from a few years ago. The filmmaker is Jeremy Saulnier and the film from a few years ago, if you didn’t already know, is BLUE RUIN (reviewed here). But the most important thing you should take from this review is that you need to get out and see GREEN ROOM as it is one of the most horrifying film experiences I’ve seen in years.

What impressed me the most about GREEN ROOM is the immersive way the film engulfs the viewer. Sure it helps to know a thing or two about the punk scene, but really, this is a film, not unlike ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13, there a group is trapped in a small place and surrounded by murderous maniacs looking to get into the fortified place the group is hiding. While the punk band is trapped in this small room, there is no way for the skinheads, lead by a super restrained and deathly powerful Patrick Stewart and BLUE RUIN’s soulful and subtle Macon Blair, to get in, so there’s a standoff here of epic proportions. This high standard is achieved because we get to know and like this band in the opening moments and sympathize with their struggle to simply make enough money to get to their next gig. Because these opening moments are so genuinely engaging, I was rooting for the band to get out of this one alive, no matter how perilous the threat.

GREEN ROOM is much more of a gory and horrific action movie than a true horror film, though there is lots of blood, scares, and horrific things going on. Those scares are potent. The stakes are dire. The characters are likable, mainly because Saulnier has padded this film with top tier talent. This is one gut punchingly good film that never holds back and spits suspense, fire, sound, and gore right in your face from start to finish. Don’t miss GREEN ROOM as it truly is one of the most in-your-facey, edge-of-your-seaty, balls-to-the-wallsy films you’re going to experience this year!
Plus it’s got an amazing soundtrack to boot by pretty much all of the punk bands you’re every going to need to know!
And finally…here’s another short from the short filmmakers from HORROR BIZARRE. This one asks and answers the age-old question; HOW WILL I DIE?! WARNING: This short goes to a very dark place rather quickly. This is some damn shocking shit! Those Norwegians have a strange sense of humor. You’ve been warned…
HOW WILL I DIE from Raymond Dullum's Horror Bizarre on Vimeo.
See ya next week, folks!
Ambush Bug is Mark L. Miller, original @$$Hole/wordslinger/writer of wrongs/reviewer/interviewer/editor of AICN COMICS for over 15 years & AICN HORROR for 5. Follow Mark on the Twitters @Mark_L_Miller.
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Look for our bi-weekly rambling about random horror films on Poptards and Ain’t It Cool on AICN HORROR’s CANNIBAL HORRORCAST Podcast every other Thursday!