Ahoy, squirts! Quint here. I'll be giving Big Red a break and will be handling the Oscars ceremony coverage this year. For many of my colleagues that would sound like a bum deal, but I gotta be honest... I love the Academy Awards. I may not be a fan of the politics surrounding awards season, but despite the best efforts of the studios year after year I just can't get cynical about the Oscars.
I've said this before, but I'm gonna repeat myself. No matter what you may think of a particular film winning or losing, the Oscars themselves are important. Maybe not as important as they were when I was a kid (or the generations before me), but important still. Before the internet The Oscars was the time of year I didn't feel isolated in my movie love. Everybody from mom and dad to the mailman to the grocery clerk watched and was in the mood to talk about movies.
It was through the glitz and glamor of this spectacle that I started to learn what editors do, what screenwriters do, what sound mixing was. These days the internet gives you all that info whenever you want it, but I still think today's movie-loving kids need that push to be curious. The information might be there, but they need to want to seek it out.
I very rarely agree with the big Oscar picks, but that doesn't mean they don't mark a time and place in cinema history. If it wasn't for these awards and the prestige (and money) they bring little films like Room you'd never see them get made, at least not in the same numbers.
Yes, this day will feature a lot of star-fucking and back-patting and ego-inflating, but it'll also very likely get some young movie fan interested in the art form. It'll get a foreign film noticed by millions who never would have heard about it before. It'll give a filmmaker or three the clout the make the correct creative decision on the next project.
So, as the red carpet gets set up and stars make sure their $10,000 dresses and suits look right, let's start a discussion about your wishes and hopes for the 2016 Academy Awards. I'll list the nominees below and come back as the red carpet arrivals start piling in to start a stream of conscious response to the awards. Follow along if ya' want!
BEST PICTURE
Spotlight (WINNER)
The Big Short
Bridge of Spies
Brooklyn
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Room
ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE
Leonardo DiCaprio, The Revenant (WINNER)
Bryan Cranston, Trumbo
Matt Damon, The Martian
Michael Fassbender, Steve Jobs
Eddie Redmayne, The Danish Girl
ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE
Brie Larson, Room (WINNER)
Cate Blanchett, Carol
Jennifer Lawrence, Joy
Charlotte Rampling, 45 Years
Saoirse Ronan, Brooklyn
ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Mark Rylance, Bridge of Spies (WINNER)
Christian Bale, The Big Short
Tom Hardy, The Revenant
Mark Ruffalo, Spotlight
Sylvester Stallone, Creed
ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Alicia Vikander, The Danish Girl (WINNER)
Jennifer Jason Leigh, The Hateful Eight
Rooney Mara, Carol
Rachel McAdams, Spotlight
Kate Winslet, Steve Jobs
ANIMATED FEATURE FILM
Inside Out (WINNER)
Anomalisa
Boy and the World
Shaun the Sheep Movie
When Marnie Was There
CINEMATOGRAPHY
Emmanuel Lubezki, The Revenant (WINNER)
Ed Lachman, Carol
Robert Richardson, The Hateful Eight
John Seale, Mad Max: Fury Road
Roger Deakins, Sicario
COSTUME DESIGN
Jenny Beavan, Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNER)
Sandy Powell, Carol
Sandy Powell, Cinderella
Paco Delgado, The Danish Girl
Jacqueline West, The Revenant
DIRECTING
Alejandro G. Inarritu, The Revenant (WINNER)
Adam McKay, The Big Short
George Miller, Mad Max: Fury Road
Lenny Abrahamson, Room
Tom McCarthy, Spotlight
DOCUMENTARY (FEATURE)
Amy (WINNER)
Cartel Land
The Look of Silence
What Happened, Miss Simone?
Winter on Fire: Ukraine’s Fight for Freedom
DOCUMENTARY (SHORT SUBJECT)
A Girl in the River: The Price of Forgiveness (WINNER)
Body Team 12
Chau, beyond the Lines
Claude Lanzmann: Spectres of the Shoah
Last Day of Freedom
FILM EDITING
Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNER)
The Big Short
The Revenant
Spotlight
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
Son of Saul (WINNER)
Embrace of the Serpent
Mustang
Theeb
A War
MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLING
Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNER)
The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed out the Window and Disappeared
The Revenant
MUSIC (ORIGINAL SCORE)
The Hateful Eight (WINNER)
Bridge of Spies
Carol
Sicario
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
MUSIC (ORIGINAL SONG)
“Writing’s On The Wall,” Spectre (WINNER)
“Earned It,” Fifty Shades of Grey
“Manta Ray,” Racing Extinction
“Simple Song #3,” Youth
“Til It Happens To You,” The Hunting Ground
PRODUCTION DESIGN
Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNER)
Bridge of Spies
The Danish Girl
The Martian
The Revenant
SHORT FILM (ANIMATED)
Bear Story (WINNER)
Prologue
Sanjay’s Super Team
We Can’t Live without Cosmos
World of Tomorrow
SHORT FILM (LIVE ACTION)
Stutterer (WINNER)
Ave Maria
Day One
Everything Will Be Okay (Alles Wird Gut)
Shok
SOUND EDITING
Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNING)
The Martian
The Revenant
Sicario
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
SOUND MIXING
Mad Max: Fury Road (WINNER)
Bridge of Spies
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
VISUAL EFFECTS
Ex Machina (WINNER)
Mad Max: Fury Road
The Martian
The Revenant
Star Wars: The Force Awakens
WRITING (ADAPTED SCREENPLAY)
The Big Short (WINNER)
Brooklyn
Carol
The Martian
Room
WRITING (ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY)
Spotlight (WINNER)
Bridge of Spies
Ex Machina
Inside Out
Straight Outta Compton
Alright, so it's almost 6:30pm CST, the ballot's filled out and Eddie Redmayne is on the red carpet talking about being an expecting dad. I wish I liked him on screen as much as I like him in interviews... I mean, Jupiter Ascending is batshit awesome, so that one doesn't count, but everything else he's done doesn't have half the charm he did when talking about his new nephew on the red carpet.
Shit's about to get real, y'all.
Matt Daaaaamon. I love that he's still playing into the Jimmy Kimmel joke, telling the reporter he's going right over to Kimmel's show after the Oscars, followed immediately by Kimmel himself telling us that snipers are on guard to keep Damon away from the studio. I hope that in 30 years we'll still get these two play fighting.
I didn't expect to see Louis Gossett Jr. on the red carpet, but it's such a pleasant surprise. This guy's the real deal and doesn't get the love he deserves.
Cate Blanchett rocking Gozer's dress from Ghostbusters and still somehow looking glamorous. Carol's a lovely character study and I'd be happy to see it win a category or two tonight, although I must admit the movie didn't make my personal ballot. Shhhh, don't tell anyone.
I just got way too excited seeing Steven Spielberg in the crowd behind Leo DiCaprio. Don't have anything else to add to that, but thought you should know.
"Your brother is a wonderful thing to you." Lady on TV to Chris Evans' sister. Great observation, Lady on TV.
My Oscar party was too loud for me to hear what they had to say, but seeing Russell Crowe and Ryan Gosling together on the TV screen made me remember that we have a new Shane Black movie coming soon and now I'm in a good mood.
"I counted at least 15 black people on that montage!" Chris Rock going right for it off the bat.
My Oscar party just went nuts with the fumbling camera after Rock's "We were too busy worrying about getting raped and lynched to worry about the Oscars" joke. Can they top that awkward cut tonight? We'll see...
Can I just say how much I love that Chris Rock's opener is making the entire room super uncomfortable?
First up is Original Screenplay. Spotlight wins it! Best pick for this category, in my opinion although I wouldn't have been sad if Inside Out took it.
Adapted Screenplay is presented by Russell Crowe and Ryan Gosling. The two have great charisma. The Nice Guys can't come fast enough.
THE BIG SHORT takes it! I have a feeling this'll be the biggest award it takes tonight, but you gotta give it to that film for taking a complicated scam and making it fully understandable for everybody. If it were me I woulda given it to The Martian because that movie's kind of a miracle and Drew Goddard is the bestest, but sadly I am not God of Oscars. Yet.
This Black Actors in the Oscar Movies segment was kinda brilliant. Leslie Jones as the Bear from The Revenant and Tracy Morgan as The Danish Girl in particular had me howling. The Stacey Dash thing not so much.
"Here's an artist, through no fault of his own, that sang the latest Bond song." Sarah Silverman floundered a bit, but she ended strong. Now Jude Law is singing... Wait, I'm being told that's not Jude Law, but some dude named Sam Smith... My apologies to Jude Law.
ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE... Can't believe they went with that clip from Hateful Eight, but I'm so happy they did. Jennifer Jason Leigh's reaction was priceless!
And the winner is Alicia Vikander, The Danish Girl. I'll just pretend she won for Ex Machina if you don't mind.
Next up is Costume Design. Really pulling for Mad Max, but think it might go to Cinderella. Those Oscar voting types always seem to love the big flowy dresses...
And the winner is... MAD MAX! Holy shit, Jenny Beavan's wearing leather jacket and a Doctor Who scarf and she's become my favorite person in that audience right now. And she ends with a warning that Mad Max will become a reality if we don't pay attention to climate change. Jenny Beavan's my spirit animal.
Production Design goes to Mad Max: Fury Road! Great, great, great pick. How amazing would it be if Fury Road was surprise sweep this year? Could you imagine the world-wide party that would happen if it won best picture?!?
And Fury Road gets Makeup, too! What a lovely day... even with Jared Leto fumbling through those awful jokes about merkins.
Did you guys see the look on DiCaprio and Inarritu's faces at the clapping bear joke? I'm kinda loving this Oscars, guys. Oh, and they played Live And Let Die as they went to commercial to remind us all what a good Bond song sounds like. That was very nice of them.
Cinematography up next. This is a tough category this year. All films are gorgeous and perfectly photographed for the story they told. And the winner is... Emmanuel Lubezki, The Revenant. Shouldn't be a surprise and I can't be mad because the movie is an amazing visual achievement. Sorry, Roger Deakins. You're still amazing!
Next up is Editing. Can Mad Max keep the streak going? YES. IT. CAN. Come on Fury Road sweep!
Brie Larson was super into the THX sound thing. Just when I thought I couldn't fall more in love with this woman...
So we got sound mixing and editing up now. Another difficult category. If Star Wars has a shot to win anything I think it'll be one of these two categories. And BAM! Sound Editing for Mad Max. I love that there was a sound glitch as the sound guys got up to the podium. Amazing.
Mad Max gets Sound Mixing as well! That's amazing.
Andy Serkis gets his own montage! It'd be incredible if the Oscars evolved the effects category to create a performance capture category.
And Ex Machina steals Mad Max's thunder in the Visual Effects category! Tonight's first real upset and a well deserved, if I don't say so myself. The effects in Ex Machina went beyond spectacle. Looks like Star Wars is gonna get shut out if Williams doesn't get the Best Score Oscar. Speaking of Star Wars...
Jacob Tremblay jumping out of his seat when R2, 3PO and BB-8 took the stage was super adorable. I want to adopt this kid. Also can't tell you how much I love C-3PO talking to John Williams from the stage.
Chris Rock's daughter selling girl scout cookies to the famous people is an awesome Oscar moment. Kate Winslet looked super happy with her Tagalongs. I feel ya', lady. "Lou Gossett watch out, now. You got diabetes. You can't have these."
Bear Story wins best animated short. Imma let you finish, but World of Tomorrow was the best Animated Short Film this year.
Buzz and Woody with the Animated Feature category... Eh, I love you Buzz and Woody but that intro didn't really work. The winner is... Inside Out. Again, not a surprise. It's a great film that reaches deep into your heart and squeezes at the right moments. I would have loved to have seen Anomalisa take this award, but I can't complain with great Pixar walking away with it. Pete Docter's speech to any kids watching was also a highlight of the night. Great message about not letting the conflicting emotions keep you from being creative.
Holy shit, Superfly got some love at the Oscars! What a crazy night.
Supporting Actor. This one's gotta be Sly Stallone, right? Ruffalo was so damn good in Spotlight and Rylance is so quietly powerful in Bridge of Spies, but I'm going to be shocked if Stallone doesn't walk away with it.
The winner is Mark Rylance! HUGE upset, but damn what a great choice! And what a great, humble, empathetic speech. Great surprise.
Louis CK telling us why the Documentary Short Subject is the best Oscar category is awesome. "This Oscar is going home in a Honda Civic. This Oscar will be the nicest thing they own in their life." "And the Oscar goes to... Mad Max! No... A Girl in the River!"
Daisy Ridley and Dev Patel giving Best Documentary Feature to... Amy! Another tough category this year. Cartel Land and Look of Silence were also both excellent.
The Governor's Awards section of the Oscars always looks like it'd be a more fun show. This year they gave honorary awards to Gena Rowlands, Debbie Reynolds and Spike Lee.
Oh no, the In Memoriam segment. Dave Grohl singing Blackbird? Fuck, where's the Kleenex? Starting with Wes Craven was a pleasant surprise. Christopher Lee, Maureen O'Hara, Omar Sharif, Dean Jones, Alan Rickman, Haskell Wexler, Alex Rocco, Douglas Slocombe, James Horner, Albert Maysles, David Bowie, Vilmos Zsigmond, Leonard Nimoy... So many, and yet there's still a ton they left out. Abe Vigoda, I miss you even if the Oscars don't.
Live Action Short goes to Stutterer.
Best Foreign Language film goes to Son of Saul, which was a no-brainer because it has Nazis in it.
Louis Gossett Jr starting Joe Biden's standing O! VP Joe Biden saying the words "My friend, Lady Gaga" kinda threw me for a loop. The world is magic, y'all.
What a powerful performance. That song has to be a lock, right?
Score's coming up now. Another strong category. I think it's going to Morricone, but I'd be super happy to see Williams get another Oscar. Let's see how it shakes out.
And the winner is... Ennio Morricone for The Hateful Eight! Yes! And a well deserved standing ovation to boot. How great is this? Morricone giving his respects to John Williams is just a fantastic movie geek moment.
Common and John Legend will tell us which Best Song will win the award. Don't make me say "Academy Award Winner 50 Shades of Gray..." And it goes to Sam Smith and Jimmy Napes's Bond song... Um... why do I have a feeling that the Academy Members didn't actually watch The Hunting Ground... Props to Smith for dedicating his award to the LBGT, though.
Ali G making Louis CK laugh is yet another highlight for me. "Check out another movie about a room full of white people" cut to: Room footage. Can I start a campaign for Ali G to host the Oscars next year?
JJ Abrams takes the stage to give away some gold to some other director. If George Miller gets the gold I'm going to do Blues Brothers style backflips... Booooooo, Alejandro G. Inarritu. Don't get me wrong. I'm not one of the many people on the Inarritu hate train and he did an amazing job telling a visual story with The Revenant, but I was really, really, really pulling for Miller.
Eddie Redmayne presenting Best Actress. I am sorely disappointed he's not whisper-screaming his presentation... Brie Larson has this one locked up, right? I'm not just saying that because I'm desperately in love with her, either. Gonna be a tough one. Every one of the ladies nominated here elevated their respective films.
Winner of the Best Actress Oscar is... Brie Larson! Well deserved and I really hope that this win gets more people to watch Room.
Maude Lebowski is now on stage to present the Oscar for Best Leading Actor. This could go a couple of different ways. Matt Damon's performance in The Martian looked way easy, which is probably why he won't win, but the fact it looked so effortless shows just how great he was carrying that whole movie almost solely on his shoulders. DiCaprio is the opposite. His performance looked hard. He was great in the film, gave it his all and I think that's what will get him the gold this year.
And the winner is... Leonardo DiCaprio! He bolted up those stairs! Ha! Look at how happy he is! And he remembered to thank Scorsese. His fired up speech about climate change was actually really effective. Right wing radio's gonna be pissed tomorrow morning!
The big one's about to come up. Morgan Freeman will present the Best Picture. Is it too much to hope Mad Max squeaks through?
SPOTLIGHT wins! Wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow!
Lots of upsets this year. Spotlight is just a solid, well-made throwback style investigative journalism film chock full of brilliant actors firing on all cylinders. I'm actually very happy with this win.
So, what did you guys think of this year?
-Eric Vespe
”Quint”
quint@aintitcool.com
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