Father Geek here, I just got in from a long 14 hours at The Heart of Texas Screenwriter's Conference here in Austin when I found this report from our Euro-AICN office in Paris. I can't really add anything to this report, I wasn't there, but I do know that on several occasions in my 55 years I have come away from live concerts very disappointed in what I had heard from people who I loved on vinyl, or some other recorded medium. As a psychedelic professional, handling lighting and pyro-effects at over 200 rock shows in the late 60's and early 70's I had to bare witness to this phenomenon dozens of times.
Sooooo, this review does not totally surprize me... however it does fill me with regret just the same. Now to Edgard and his Euro-AICN Special Report...
Hi Edgard here with a very long report from Skooky from the International Flanders Film Festival in Gent, Belgium... as this report is quite long, I will not be long in the introduction but let's just say I am myself a big Hans Zimmer fan (still he's not my favorite composer, far from it actually) and what Iread here below was quite, well,... sad... Read yourself... Here's Skooky...
Last night (10 October) I attended a concert of Hans Zimmer: "Hans Zimmer Live", organised by the Flanders International Film Festival in Gent (Belgium).
This review is very long. For those of you who have no intention of reading all of it, here's the gist: It was really bad. Hans Zimmer is an egotistical hack, whose scores can only really exist in the movie medium where, in all truth, they do shine. The concert was terrible. Never go to a live Hans Zimmer concert.
Before I continue, I will state that I am a big Zimmer fan. That is, I am a fan of the sound of Media Ventures, e.g.g.; the Zimmer clone family of Harry Gregson-Williams, Nicholas Glenny Smith, John Powell and Trevor Rabin (and others whose name I can't remember right now). I have always been positively biased towards Zimmer and his studio engineered sound -have been since the Rock soundtrack, even though the music itself cannot be described as truly aesthetically interesting (like the scores by John Williams, Jerry Goldsmith, Eliott Goldenthal, Trevor Jones and Howard Shore).
I was accompanied by two other avid film score fans, the editor of the excellent online soundtrack magazine FOD-Online (www.fod-online.com), and a dutch soundtrack composer, who was very interested in seeing how Zimmer would handle the orchestrations, since he will shortly travel to Moscow to orchestrate his own score with the Moscow Symphony Orchestra, for a dutch production.
I calibrated my review about the concert by the opinions of those people, who are much more into that scene than I am, (and I think, whose tastes are much more refined than mine) and we all came to the same conclusion.
It was very, very bad.
The concert started at 8 PM, and when we arrived in Gent after having traveled three hours from the Netherlands to Belgium, we came to the shocking conclusion that the concert was to be held in what appeared to be a wheelracing (bicycle race) centrum! We were shown our places on the tribune, and saw that part of the cycling range had been converted to a podium for a large orchestra.
Even so, I was rather psyched, and was looking forward to hear the "oomph" of Zimmer's Gladiator as performed by a live orchestra. We were rather worried about the accoustics of the wheelracing track, and it turned out that we were right.
The lights went out and the orchestra walked on to the podium: it was a big, big orchestra, and a big, BIG choir. People were cheering and applauding when they appeared. Then the presenters appeared on stage and told us that there was a special guest.
And on walked Morgan Freeman! Mr. Freeman talked shortly about the honor of being invited to the film festival and to this concert, and that Zimmer was a much celebrated composer of soundtracks, blah blah blah. He appeared to be a little jetlagged, and quickly sat down again. After that, Hans Zimmer appeared.
For all my high hopes, I can honestly say that Hans Zimmer is probably the most nerdy guy I have ever seen besides Bill Gates, and that the man has an ego the size of Gibraltar Rock and little respect for the people that perform his compositions. As my friend the composer explained to me, while the great composers like John Williams basically write, orchestrate and conduct their own scores, Hans Zimmer basically writes a few MIDI files, which are then translated into an orchestration. The ones who actually make it sound good are the orchestra and conductor. And of course, some heavy duty mixing on the part of the Media Venture studios.
The first theme to be played was "Driving Miss Daisy", which was okay-ish: not my cup of tea really. Then Rain Man, which was horrible: certain sections of the orchestra could not be heard because other sections played way to loud. Most notably the pan flute (which features prominently in the Rain Man score as you might know) was completely inaudible. Then came the main theme from "Crimson Tide" and two tracks from "The Thin Red Line". Mr. Zimmer explained this as being a contrast: Crimson Tide his most martial score, Thin Red Line his most pacifist score. Whatever. I really had high hopes for both, since they rate as being my favorite Zimmer soundtracks next to the Rock, Peacemaker, Backdraft and Gladiator, but I was sorely disappointed.
The accoustics were terrible: they had to direct the sound towards the audience via a monstrous PA system that crushed the music into a wall of noise. The percussion was much too loud, overplaying the subtler elements of especially the Thin Red Line tracks. A lot of times the orchestra could not match the speed of the Crimson Tide theme, basically (as it was later explained to me) because Zimmer has a habit of arranging the instruments to play notes that ordinary instruments (except digitally remixed ones and synthesizers) cannot possibly reach. Crimson Tide sounded like a schoolband playing a badly rehearsed anthem. It was laughable. At one point one of the guys of the percussion section started what conductors call "driving" or "hunting" (my translation from Dutch might be a little off): basically, the percussion starts to go faster and faster, ignoring the rest of the orchestra. The orchestra had no choice but to match the percussions' speed, with the result that the composition might falter a bit. And that did happen.
Next on the menu was Nine Months (the movie with Hugh Grant if I am not mistaken). About this, mr. Zimmer said that "It might not be Chris Columbus' best film, it might not be my best score, but I basically wrote it for my wife as a love theme, so I wanted to play it." Oh-my-god. I have never heard such inane musical drivel in my entire life.
At this point something became clear to me: throughout the songs we'd already heard and seen, mr. Zimmer hadn't *done* anything. Basically, he stood behind his synthesizer doing a Vangelis (making interesting faces, looking very artistic, striking fancy poses behind his keyboard). There's wasn't much else he could do, for the orchestra, choir, and conductor and the sound people were doing all the work! Every time mr. Zimmer's arrogant poses and faces appeared on the giant viewscreen I had to focus on the orchestra instead. The man was just too irritating. It was just so typical to see mr. Zimmer standing there basically putting up a phoney sideshow, and all the while I was thinking about the raving reviews of the John William concerts. Watching mr. Zimmer, one word started to come to the forefront of my mind: hack.
Okay, so next was Gladiator. They played three tracks: "The Battle", "Am I not Merciful?" and "Now we are free". Was it any good? Yes and No.
Yes -because Lisa Gerhard appeared on the podium to join in. I had imagined her to be older, but she was mid thirty-ish, wearing a massive tapering blue gown closed at her throat and obscuring everything of her body except her head and her hands. Her hair was pulled back high in an elaborate knot, her face pale -adorned with little make up. I mean it positively when I say she looked a bit like the Bride of Frankestein from one of the old black and white Frankenstein movies: there was something unearthly beautiful about her. She had a formidable stage presence. Gone was Hans Zimmer and his Vangelis act. All eyes were upon Lisa Gerhard. While she sung she kept her face tilted upward, eyes lidded, commanding attention from everyone while she sung (for those who do not know her: she does the vocals on the Heat, Gladiator and Mission Impossible soundtracks and composes soundtrack scores herself). She reminded me of a high priestess of some sort. Needless to say, I was smitten. During "Now we are free", mr. Zimmer asked an additonal female singer on the podium: a girl they had found in a diner in Gent, who would sing along. I don't know exactly what the story was (mr. Zimmer didn't elaborate, just saying that they were looking for additional vocals at the last moment), but she was rather young, a bit frightened and it was the first time that she performed for an audience. She was intimidated by Lisa Gerhard, but the two sung well together.
No -because again, certain sections of the orchestra were playing louder than others, fucking up certain key moments of the soundtrack, the choir was much too subdued during the end of "Am I not Merciful?", and the gargantuan PA system just...mangled the sound and accoustics. Oh, and did I mention mr. Zimmer doing his Vangelis act?
Overall the Gladiator pieces were very offbeat, but I liked the parts where Lisa Gerhard sung.
Next came the break, and after having gulped down a beer, we returned to our seats. What followed was completely terrible and nerve-grinding. Mr. Zimmer apparently had decided that his music being played by a large orchestra didn't give him enough credit, so he basically invited all of his friends to come over to jam. The next half of the concert was a blur of musical scores I but barely recognised, but of which I am pretty sure that Hans didn't even try to make them sound like they would have on their respective cd's or records. Increasingly, the orchestra and choir sat silent, doing nothing, except for the occasional string section underscoring the masturbational ego trip mr. Zimmer and friends were taking.
The best part of the concert came suddenly in between these terrible wastes of orchestral resources. They played the theme from Chicken Run! Yeah! God damn, this was good! Before they started, mr. Zimmer almost sneerlingly stated that "This was not his fault" and sat down behind his synth, this time plainly doing nothing. Of course he couldn't because the soundtrack was composed by Harry Gregson Williams and John Powell (both present in the band that was supporting Zimmer's synth work with guitars and other instruments), and he had nothing to do with it. This time round, it worked (and sounded) like a charm! Why? Well the composer guy who was with us told me that often, when orchestra and conductor are faced with a terrible composition (such as mr. Zimmer's works evidently are), they loose a bit of heart, and thus, don't play so well. But in the case of Chicken Run, it appeared that mr. Gregson Williams and mr. Powell did an outstanding job composing the score, and the orchestra and choir really got into it. The choir, comprised of I think at least 50 men and women, all pulled out kazoo's and hummed merrily along with the theme. It was great. Really the height of the concert.
After that the orchestra, conductor and choir where demoted to third fiddle again as mr. Zimmer announced that a guitarist from the Chicago Blues Band would be playing with them, and that he admired the man greatly. I hate the lubricating KY-jelly guitar sounds that Zimmer and his clones use so often in their scores. I always imagine a washed-out,middleaged rock star playing along, desperately trying to resurrect his career. And guess what? He was right there on stage. My mind could not fathom it. Zimmer was in front of a massive audience with a very good orchestra, a place only the great composers should get. He could have played anything! From Backdraft to the Peacemaker, to the whole Gladiator cd, to Broken Arrow, you name it! Or how about - gasp - shock - horror - playing some of his earlier synth work for Pacific Heights or the Paper House? You know, actually do something except sitting behind his synth and piano, looking like a bastardized crossbreed between Elton John and Vangelis after having snorted a pound of cocaine.
He might have done the title of the concert some justice: 'Hans Zimmer Live'.
But they might have just as well called it: "Night of the Living Zimmer Posse". What did he do? He put the orchestra in the ice box and started to play "garage rock band" with a couple of washed out has-beens!
It didn't stop there. Noooooooo, after a harrowing five minutes of mind-numbing Satriani-like musical spasms, Zimmer produces another one of his fine friends. This time it's the guy who did the accoustic guitars on Mission Impossible 2.
Did they do the cool hard rock-ized theme from MI:2? Nooooooo, they performed the love song from MI:2, which mr. Zimmer introduced by saying that he wrote it "in five minutes". Well excuse me Hans, but that sounds almost right. In fact, it sounds like you wrote it under ten seconds while reading the newspaper on the toilet, listening to the soupy statements of your bowel movements. This too, went on, and on, and on and on, with the guy on the accoustic guitar playing riffs for a mind-blowing two or three minutes at a time while the orchestra had to wait before they could perform some string work.
It was just getting worse and worse. But the torment had only just begun. Because, next on the agenda was a native african choir and the indomitable Lebo M.
I had never heard of Lebo M, but apparently he has done work as a vocalist for a number of composers among which Jerry Goldsmith. With him was another female singer whom I didn't recognize.
They launched into several songs from "The power of One", which I guess is okay, it is after all, one of Zimmer's scores, but what really irritated the hell out of me, was that by this time, the whole concert wasn't really about the soundtracks any more (the sound was horrible after all, and so was the selection of soundtracks he had made), it was about Zimmer and his friends stealing the limelight. Lebo M and the female native african singer performed like THEY were the centre of the concert, improvising and generally taking their vocal parts as far as they could go. That is, singing an entire medley in which the orchestra could not even be heard any more, and that kept going on and on and on.
Lebo M is a name I will try to avoid for the rest of my natural life.
Zimmer was doing his best to surpass even the worst of Vangelis acts, looking very involved and masterly while he sat down and stood up and sat down behind his synth, giving emotional cues to the orchestra and band which I am pretty sure they didn't need at all, and generally straining my ears and muzak-tolerance capacity to the limit.
When they finally stopped, Morgan Freeman appeared on stage again and presented mr. Zimmer with an award (from what organization or institution I missed completely, for my eyes and ears where bleeding severely), after which he hurriedly disappeared from stage. Hans Zimmer, Lisa Gerhard, Lebo M and the other native african singer were presented with flowers. Then Zimmer said something like: "what the hell, in stead of waiting for you guys to ask for an encore, let's do it right away!"
My sobs of anguish and denial were choking me.
Hans explained that he wanted to jam with all his friends, just to see where it would lead, but that the conductor of the orchestra had begged him to at least rehearse the parts for the orchestra. Again, the tone in his voice when he said this was somewhat sneering. But then again, I was so irritated with him and his friends that I could be mistaken.
Well this part of the concert was just...Words cannot describe it, but "terrible" and "ego-driven" come close. The guy from the Chicago Blues Band, Zimmer, Zimmer's Clone Band, The-Guy-Who-Did-Accoustic-Guitars-On-MI:2, Lebo M and his female singer, all tried to drone each other out with as much solos and improvisations as possible (except for Zimmer of course, who still didn't actually produce anything audible), with the orchestra desperately trying to make some sense from it all. Lisa Gerhard tried to jam along, but with the louder than loud wailing from Lebo M and his female sidekick, she was barely heard.
Cacophony is the correct word I would use to describe those last few moments.
In Zimmer's case with an emphasis on "phony".
Zimmer and his posse then left the stage, but since the orchestra was still sitting, I guessed that they would return for another bone-jarring encore. And they did. To reprise "the Power of One". Most notable was the absence of Lisa Gerhard this time.
I cannot think of another cynical way to describe the efforts of Lebo M, his sidekick, the guy from the Chicago Blues Band, Zimmer, Zimmer's Clone Band and The-Guy-Who-Did-Accoustic-Guitars-On-MI:2. They all tried to outdo eachother, and Lebo M was performing like it was his own concert and so was his female sidekick. They were like a bunch of very very bad James Brown/Whitney Houston/Pink Floyd/Satriani/Vangelis impersonators, shakily accompanied by an orchestra and choir for whom I have deepfelt sympathies. It is evident that Hans Zimmer would rather play in a band and be cool (insert canned laughter here), than perform his beautiful scoreworks consistently and professionally. He behaved like an aged rock star who desperately wants to regain some former glory. In his case, like a 43 year old who desperately wants to be in a band. How do I come to this conclusion? Throughout the concert, he showed great disrespect towards the excellent conductor, orchestra and choir, trying to focus the concert on himself and his friends and generally behaving like a spoiled middleaged member of a boyband. Oh wait! During his teens he *was* a background vocalist and keyboardist for the Buggles. The Buggles had one major hit called "Video Killed the Radio Star". Could this have anything to do with it? *Sigh* I couldn't actually care less...
Anyway, then the concert was finally over.
In case you are wondering, I am not a Zimmer hater. I love his work for the movies. I *have* very recently (since yesterday evening coincidentally) become a Lebo M hater, but I won't go into that any further. I love the Zimmer sound. But he should not be left loose on stage. It is evident (a conclusion made also by my illustrious companions), that Zimmer's compositions are best not played live, where they can't be rerecorded and remixed into perpetuity by the wizards of Media Ventures. They must truly be wizards, for what I saw and heard last evening was terrible, and I wished it had been otherwise.
For now it will take at least several weeks, perhaps even months, before I can listen to Gladiator and Crimson Tide, and other beautiful Zimmer works again without thinking of the dreadful spectacle mr. Zimmer managed to disgust me with.
-call me Skooky
