
Greetings, all. Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. This week, on tap we’ve got naked aliens, mass graves, a kiddie killing spree, giant rodents, haunted sex, nuke survivors, a damn dirty ape, & more MONSTERS TV episodes!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
The Boo Tube: MONSTERS Season Two Episodes 18-24 (1990)
Retro-review: BLOODY BIRTHDAY (1981)
Retro-review: DEADLY EYES (1982)
AFTERMATH (2012)
SX_TAPE (2013)
OPEN GRAVE (2013)
UNDER THE SKIN (2013)
And finally…Aaron David Gleason’s MASTERMIND!


MONSTERS: THE COMPLETE SERIES Box Set
Season Two: Episodes 18-24 (1990)Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug
Ahhh, MONSTERS. It’s one of those TV series that warms my heart. Back in the late 80’s, when practical effects were king, Mitchell Gallin and Richard P. Rubinstein, the producers of TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE TV series, decided to put together a show which highlighted a different story about a different monster every week. In my region the show was broadcast late at night, and it was a thrill to be able to stay up late and watch it. Now, given the amount of years since I’ve watched it, I’m bound to be disappointed at the way some of them present upon reviewing. But still, this was a fun series deserving of this look back, episode by episode, of this quaint little shock series. I’m currently looking back on the TWILIGHT ZONE series as well, so for the time being, I’ll be flipping between TZ and MONSTERS every week looking back on TV horrors of yesteryear episode by episode!

Directed by Ernest D. Farino
Written by Dan Simmons
Starring Orson Bean, Robert Krantz, Bob Larkin, Karen Hittelman
This was a surprisingly heavy episode of MONSTERS, dealing with cancer in a way that feels like it was written through the eyes of someone trying to understand and make sense of the horrific disease that takes away so many. A man wakes from a car accident with a brain injury in a hospital that also houses his mother, who is terminally ill with cancer. The doctor (played by BEING JOHN MALKOVICH’s Orson Bean) warns the man that he might have some hallucinations due to the brain swelling, but that warning doesn’t prepare the guy for the visions he sees. Taking a page from HP Lovecraft’s FROM BEYOND, the man sees things the normal human can’t—this particular case being a weird insectoid creature that injects patients with black slug-like monsters. This shows up as cancer in the real world. The episode culminates in the man’s fight to save the life of his mother by battling the cancer beast. There are definitely some creepy moments, like when the man notices that his own doctor has a cancer beast in his mouth while smoking a pipe. While horror is usually a place ripe with metaphor, MONSTERS episodes have not been, so it’s refreshing to see these allegories play out when they can.

Directed by Debra Hill
Written by Robert Barbour Johnson (story), Michael McDowell (teleplay)
Starring Barry Nelson, John Scott Clough, Calvin Levels, Rick Goldman, Jan Munroe
Longtime John Carpenter collaborator Debra Hill directs from a script from Michael BEETLEJUICE MacDowell about a subway operator played by THE SHINING’s hotel manager Barry Nelson and a quality inspector who see Yeti-like creatures shambling around the tunnels of the subway system. This is a somewhat goofy little yarn which reminded me of the “The Crate” installment in CREEPSHOW in both the choice of beast and the way the two throw their lives on the line and in the line of the beast’s claws and teeth. Ending on a bizarre note, this one isn’t going to win any awards, but definitely is high on the old odd-meter.

Directed by Anthony Santa Croce
Written by D. Emerson Smith
Starring Troy Donahue, Belle Avery, David Parmenter
Discovering a sentient microscopic world puts two scientists as odds with one another. This fun science gone wrong episode stands out for its goofy yet fun sequence featuring a woman being chased by a giant undulating brain creature. While it’s simply a gooey sack of filled with air, the effects behind this one make it more fun than it deserves to be.

Directed by Scott Vickrey
Written by Haskell Barkin
Starring Peter White, Judy Geeson, S.A. Griffin, Philip Abbott
Super spies meet deadly demons in this goofy story that deserves to be revisited in some kind of reboot or reimagining. I love the idea of mixing high-stakes intrigue and espionage with the occult and though it only barely taps into the creative potential the mixing of these two subjects possess, there are some fun bits here as black suited demons show up to take on our 007-esque spies. The effects are subtle here which make it all the more fun, especially the glowing hot fingers of the demons melting through leather gloves.

Directed by Jeffrey Wolf
Written by D. Emerson Smith
Starring Abe Vigoda, John Bolger, Brad Greenquist, Zach Overton, Carlos Lauchu
The fact that BARNEY MILLER star Abe Vigoda stars in this one as a kidnapper who eloquently explains the different between the haves and the have-nots in the world to the young man he has stolen makes this episode memorable and amazing. The added bonus that it also has a shape-changing monster thing that can turn others into shape-changing monster thing is all the more fun. Not high quality, but Vigoda and the monster make it fun.

Directed by Tom Noonan
Written by Tom Noonan
Starring Kim Greist, Kevin Geer, Sharon Sharth
Written and directed by creepy actor Tom Noonan from HEAT and MANHUNTER directs his co-star on MANHUNTER Kim Greist as a book store worker trying to get a TV repair man to notice her. When she happens upon a number in a old magazine promising a new face, the bookish woman turns into a blonde bombshell and the TV guy can’t keep his eyes off of her. But with all deals too good to be true, this one comes back to haunt her and while the ending is predictable, Noonan shows a lot of promise as a director here. It makes me wonder what Noonan would have accomplished had he stayed behind the camera instead of playing offbeat characters in front of it, as this one is decently written and filmed.

Directed by Michael Warren Powell
Written by Allen Coulter, Gordon Rayfield
Starring Michael O'Gorman, Annie Corley, Calvin Armitage, Kelli Rabke, Carlos Lauchu
BOARDWALK EMPIRE and THE SOPRANOS writer Allen Coulter helped co-write this story of a young boy who defends his family from aliens which only can be seen when he wears his father’s glasses. This one attempts to pull at the heartstrings, but the acting isn’t really up to snuff to do that. That said, the reptilian aliens are pretty nicely rendered. Still this definitely isn’t one of the stories Coulter used to get his gig writing for HBO.
Season 1: Episodes 1.1-1.6, 1.7-1.12, 1.13-1.18, 1.19-1.22, 1.23-1.24
Season 2: Episodes 2.1-2.5, 2.6-2.10, 2.11-2.17

BLOODY BIRTHDAY (1981)
aka CREEPS, ANGSTDirected by Ed Hunt
Written by Ed Hunt (screenplay), Barry Pearson (screenplay)
Starring Lori Lethin, Melinda Cordell, Julie Brown, Joe Penny, Bert Kramer, K.C. Martel, Elizabeth Hoy, Billy Jayne, Andrew Freeman, Susan Strasberg, José Ferrer, Ben Marley, Erica Hope, Ellen Geer
Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug

BLOODY BIRTHDAY opens with a trio of women delivering three children on the night of a lunar eclipse. Years later, and the pre-teens have grown into little monsters as Curtis (JUST ONE OF THE GUY’s Billy Jayne), Debbie (Elizabeth Hoy who is the leetle gurrl John Beliushi attempts to purchase in THE BLUES BROTHERS), and Steven (Andy Freeman who went on to star in BEYOND WITCH MOUNTAIN) go on a killing spree later explained through pop astrology as Saturn, which is the source of our emotions (WTF?), being blocked out by the eclipse resulting in the little shits being born without emotion or remorse. K.C.Martel (who went on the play one of the kids in E.T. THE EXTRA-TERRESTRIAL) plays the wholesome Timmy who tries to befriend the kids, but ends up being the first to realize something is not kosher with these kids. Meanwhile, the teen unit of this film including Timmy’s sister Joyce (Lori Lethin from THE PREY and THE DAY AFTER) and a very naked and young Julie Brown (from the MTV back when videos were played there) walk around ignoring obvious signs of kiddie killing sprees.

Despite all of that, BLOODY BIRTHDAY does swipe a lot from films like THE OMEN, THE CHILDREN, and HALLOWEEN with the teenage babysitter angle and especially during the killing sprees. Lori Lethin’s Joyce lacks the spunk of a Jamie Lee Curtis, but there are scenes of her and Julie Brown walking down the street talking about boys and then running into Brown’s police officer father that feels like it’s been completely lifted from Carpenter’s classic. There’s even a boyfriend named Paul, fer chrissakes.

So while BLOODY BIRTHDAY owes a lot to many different and better films, it is worth checking out. Mr. Skin-o-philes will want to catch Julie Brown as she was a hot little number in this film. And while the acting is not top tier and the film definitely cops out in the end to give it an ending that gives these asshole kids what they deserve, there are enough creepy scenes to make understand why it is the cult classic as it is.

DEADLY EYES (1982)
aka NIGHT EYES, THE RATSDirected by Robert Clouse
Written by James Herbert (novel), Lonon F. Smith (earlier screenplay), Charles H. Eglee (screenplay)
Starring Sam Groom, Sara Botsford, Scatman Crothers, Cec Linder, Lisa Langlois, Lesleh Donaldson, James B. Douglas, Lee-Max Walton, Joseph Kelly, Kevin Foxx, Jon Wise, Wendy Bushell, Charles Jolliffe, Dora Dainton
Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug


Taking a page from THE KILLER SHREWS (reviewed here), the makers of DEADLY EYES decked out dachshunds in rat costumes to give the rats mobility –this was before CGI, you know. Other shots are obvious hand puppets, but director Robert Clouse (who directed ENTER THE DRAGON and A GAME OF DEATH which is featured as playing in the movie theater which is besieged by rats during the climax of the film) did a pretty decent job of splicing it all together to make it all work. Seeing the rats make their way through the maze of tunnels actually looks pretty awesome, despite the knowledge that these are obvious practical effects. Something about that ingenuity makes it all the more appealing to me and Clouse didn’t hold back on the blood either as the film is filled with all sorts of biting rat mayhem. Clouse keeps things dark, which most likely was due to cover up the seams of the rat costumes, but these scenes bring an air of shadowy atmosphere as well.

Special features to this Blu include an awesome documentary called DOGS IN RATS’ CLOTHING which talks with the filmmakers about how they got the dogs into the rat costumes and the arduous task of making them all work. There are also interviews with actors Lisa Langolis, Lesleh Donaldson, Joseph Kelly and Special effects artist Allan Apone. As usual, Shout Factory has done it again, dusting off the droppings collected on this bright shiny rat turd of a fun film and making it look as good as it ever will be.

AFTERMATH (2012)
aka REMNANTSDirected by Peter Engert
Written by Christian McDonald
Starring Edward Furlong, Monica Keena, William Baldwin, Andre Royo, C.J. Thomason, Luis Da Silva Jr., Bo Mitchell, Ross Britz, Randal Reeder, Christine Kelly
Reviewed by Ambush Bug

During the opening sequence of the film, a lone man named Hunter (C.J. Thomason) staggers across a deserted road while news plays in the background talking about heightened conflicts in the Middle East, American involvement, and an increase in terrorist activities and then a nuclear bomb drops in the background. Struggling to get to shelter with survivors from a nearby highway, Hunter leads a group to a farmhouse with a concrete basement where more survivors have congregated. Sealing themselves in, the group must work together to survive or die from the dangers both nuclear and human trying to enter their sanctuary.

What this film does offer is an info dump as Hunter appears to know quite a bit about nuclear survival and the aftereffects of the radiation. But instead of incorporating that into the story, Hunter just barks these facts at the other survivors the whole time. I really found this info fun and something I hadn’t really seen before in a film and had the script made it happen in the film, I think this would have been all the more successful. Instead the easy way of telling us this info results in the least interesting.

If you’ve seen any zombie/nuclear apocalypse/monster outside the house standoff film, you’re bound to get bored with the situation AFTERMATH plays out in the first hour fifteen. It’s people trapped and bouncing off of one another—the kind of conflict we’ve seen in everything from NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD to THE DIVIDE. But because so many films have been made about the apocalypse and life after, you have to do something pretty special and different in order to be worth seeing. AFTERMATH tells the story decently, but it’s the same thing with too little to make it distinct from the rest of the fallout.

SX_TAPE (2013)
aka SXTAPEDirected by Bernard Rose
Written by Eric Reese
Starring Caitlyn Folley, Julie Marcus, Chris Coy, Daniel Faraldo, Diana García, Eric Neil Gutierrez
Find out more about this film on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
I’ve heard a lot of harsh criticism of SX_TAPE, the latest in what seems to be an endless barrage of found footage films. For what seems like ages, first time and fledgling filmmakers have made attempts to make it big by cutting costs and filming in the first person. But it seems like even more seasoned filmmakers are firing that fancy cinematographer, dropping the steady cam, and shaking that lens. Last year, wizened filmmaker Barry Levinson took a stab at the subgenre with THE BAY and now CANDYMAN director Bernard Rose is dipping his toe into the POV pool.

As far as technical aspects of the found footage film, the whole thing is structured in a sound fashion. No cheat edits or cuts are made and pretty much everything looks and feels as if this were an authentic tape. Having this plus going for the film, in terms of keeping this viewer into the film, it was successful. The main problem is that there aren’t a lot of characters here worth following. Jill is vapid from the get go and leads Adam on as if she has him on a lease. At the same time, the only advantage or some semblance of control Adam has in the relationship comes when he actually binds her to a bed which doesn’t exactly paint him as a strong or likable character himself. Let’s not even go into the dickbag friend of Jill’s who bullies Adam and threatens to sleep with Jill as soon as Adam’s back is turned and another female; the only “good” person in the group, who barely has enough screen time to form an opinion about her. Because of this lack of likable characters, it’s hard to give a shit about them once they’re in peril. Sure Jill is sexy as all get out, but presents with an air that will most likely register as shallow and the worst type of product of Hollywood.

Director Rose, who was so effective in chilling and thrilling with CANDYMAN, doesn’t really show any of that intensity or creativity here. Sure SX-TAPE is a technically sound found footager, but the simple fact that I didn’t care whether or not this footage was found or about any of the characters makes the film one I’d prefer to remain lost. A few jumps and startles make it fun, but nothing more than run of the mill. Still the ire for this film confounds me, as it is simply middle of the road and not worth the effort or all the hatred.

OPEN GRAVE (2013)
Directed by Gonzalo Lopez-GallegoWritten by Eddie Borey & Chris Borey
Starring Sharlto Copley, Thomas Kretschmann, Josie Ho, Joseph Morgan, Erin Richards, Max Wrottesley
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
A man (Sharlto Copley) wakes up in a pit filled with dead bodies confused and without a shred of memory as to how he got there or even who he is. That’s how OPEN GRAVE begins and its one of those films which hits the ground running and never really lets up until the credits start to role.

While there are homicidal axe-wielding madmen and corpses hanging from trees in this film, for the most part this is a tension filled mystery with a clock ticking to see who can solve the riddle and make it out alive. While it may be difficult for some to deal with all of the ambiguity in the opening 45 minutes, the strong characters make it all the more enjoyable and will most likely entice you to ride this wave to the end, despite not knowing what the hell is going on.

OPEN GRAVE is thriller/chiller tighter than a Marine’s bunk sheets with Copley once again proving to be a fantastic actor in that he causes us to identify and hate him intermittently throughout the narrative. Though uncharacteristically expansive in scope, OPEN GRAVE feels like a mystery that Hitchcock himself might have cooked up.

UNDER THE SKIN (2013)
Directed by Jonathan GlazerWritten by Walter Campbell & Jonathan Glazer (screenplay), Michel Faber (novel)
Starring Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy McWilliams, Lynsey Taylor Mackay, Dougie McConnell, Kevin McAlinden, D. Meade, Andrew Gorman, Joe Szula, Krystof Hádek, Roy Armstrong, Alison Chand, Ben Mills, Oscar Mills, Lee Fanning, Paul Brannigan,
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
UNDER THE SKIN is an ambitious film unlike any I’ve seen in quite a while. The film is obtuse, open for interpretation, and utterly patient as far as storytelling, and while it is definitely a film I am glad I saw, I know it’s definitely not going to be a film for everyone.
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There’s more to UNDER THE SKIN. The film is actually quite nuanced, but for many, I think it’ll be hard for folks to stick with the film in order to see just what transpires. Moving at a snail’s pace, the alien picks up one person after the next, taking part in the same ritual over and over which entails the alien (Johansson) disrobing as she walks across a mirrored black floor. Behind her, follows her victim who, thinking he’s going to have him some sexy time, who disrobes as well one article of clothing at a time. What the victim doesn’t notice is that he is sinking into the floor and soon sinks completely into the mirrored surface and disappears. This scene is repeated numerous times through the movie, revealing a little more info about what’s going on every time it occurs. Still, even after we find out what happens to the victims under the surface, it’s still not completely clear.

Now storywise, I think the film comes up a bit lacking as it’s not until an hour in that we really see anything resembling a conflict in need of a resolution until Johansson starts feeling some kind of empathy for her victims. Those with little patience will definitely have tuned out by then. Johansson is amazing in the role, offering up an inscrutable façade for most of the film and shifting this look only slightly once she begins to realize what she is doing might be wrong when she picks up a man who is terribly deformed. Still, even when the emotions start to creep in, Johansson plays it pretty blank; emoting only in small ticks and quivers. Yes, there has been much said about her nakedness in this film and those scenes are bound to excite men and women alike, but her performance here is much more nuanced than sheer cheesecake and shows a talented actress under all of that sexy exterior. I was surprised at how much she says simply with her eyes alone as much of this film is following her silently pursuing her victims, while the other half is her running away from the chaos she has caused.

The ending, when it does arrive at just shy of the two hour mark, is pretty intense. Again, as Glazer did throughout, it is filled with shots I had never experienced before. Again, it’s a quiet, yet utterly deafening barrage of imagery and sensations. It takes things to a logical place, though the rest of the film feels highly foreign to logic and resolves things in a tragic and awful manner. UNDER THE SKIN got a lot of press because of Johansson’s nudity, but that’s the least interesting part of the film. What really makes it work is the unique eye of Glazer and the bizarre story by Michel Faber. At times, it’s so grotesque you’re going to want to turn away, but the inundation of sights and sounds are going to grip those who allow themselves to be engulfed by the film.
And finally…here’s a music video directed by Jeramiah Kipp who directed the short film CRESTFALLEN which I featured a while back. This video from Aaron David Gleason stars Chris Sarandon (FRIGHT NIGHT, THE PRINCESS BRIDE), Joanna Gleason (INTO THE WOODS, Dirk Diggler's mom from BOOGIE KNIGHTS) and Alice Ripley (The Who’s TOMMY). Not only do I dig the song, but the video is full of all types of spooky and cool imagery. Enjoy MASTERMIND!
See ya next week, folks!

Be sure to tell your comic shop to order his new comic PIROUETTE from July’s Diamond Previews (item code JUL14 0937) today!


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