
Greetings, all. Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. This week I’ve got two versions of the same Lovecraft tale, butt demons, post-apocalyptic love, post-life love, vampires, Vikings, ghosts, and torture! Just the way grandma likes it!
On with the horror reviews!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
Retro-Review: DIE MONSTER DIE! (1965)
DIE FARBE (2010)
DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL (2012)
AFTER DEATH (2012)
DEAD WEIGHT (2012)
BLACK WATER VAMPIRE (2014)
VIKINGDOM (2013)
BAD MILO (2013)
Advance Review: limp. (2013)
And finally…HP Lovecraft’s THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE!

DIE MONSTER DIE! (1965)
aka THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE, THE HOUSE AT THE END OF THE WORLD, MONSTER OF TERROR, DIE MONSTERDirected by Daniel Haller
Written by Jerry Sohl (screenplay), H.P. Lovecraft (from "The Colour Out of Space")
Starring Boris Karloff, Nick Adams, Freda Jackson, Suzan Farmer, Terence de Marney, Patrick Magee, Paul Farrell, Leslie Dwyer, Sydney Bromley
Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug

While it’s filled with moments that are kind of kitschy cool, you’re not likely to find indescribable terror from DIE MONSTER DIE. The hokey effects and overacting are sure to cause more laughs than shudders. Still, there are a lot of reasons to pick up this film. First and foremost, it’s the first time it’s on BluRay. Though the special features only include a trailer, the film itself is cleaner and more clear than I’ve ever seen this schlocker before--and most likely clearer than it ever should be.

Like a Hammer film, DIE MONSTER DIE is set in a gothic castle. Though a more modern tale, the film has that aged quality seen in most Hammer films as if it were filmed in a far-off land, with eloquently painted backgrounds instead of real landscapes and outdoor scenes set up looking more like stages because that’s where they were filmed. At the heart of the film, again like a Hammer film, is a passionate romance where the dashing hero must swoop in to rescue an otherwise-detained beauty.

There’s a lot of fun to be had at this oldie but goodie. While it might not exactly capture the menace of Lovecraft’s original story “The Colour Out of Space”, the offbeat effects and the appearance of Boris Karloff late in his career make this one worthwhile.

DIE FARBE (2010)
aka THE COLOUR, THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACEDirected by Huan Vu
Written by H.P. Lovecraft (short story), Huan Vu (screenplay)
Starring Paul Dorsch, Jürgen Heimüller, Ingo Heise, Philipp Jacobs, Michael Kausch, Olaf Krätke, Marco Leibnitz, Ralf Lichtenberg, Patrick Pierce, Erik Rastetter, Friedrich Schilha, Marah Schneider, Leon Schröder, Alexander Sebastian Curd Schuster
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug

Director Huan Vu makes every scene unique by utilizing the absence of color with vast landscapes and hardly noticeable computer effects in this black and white tale of nature driven mad by forces beyond the stars and imagination. Vu only uses color in the latter portion of the film as the effects of the meteorite are evident, but until those brightly colored patches set against the black and white backdrop, everything is in shadows and light which makes the effects much more seamless and realistic. There’s a scene with a giant animated hornet sitting on a woman’s head that will have you wincing. There’s just something about the lack of color in this film that makes it all feel more ominous and real.

Though it didn’t bother me much as I don’t mind reading subtitles, DIE FARBE feels as if it doesn’t know if it’s a film that wants to speak English or German or both or some kind of weird amalgam of both languages. At times, it felt odd having the subtitles on as there are parts all in English, then there are huge chunks in German. Again, not a big deal, but something that distracted me from the film itself.
But nothing deters from the fact that this is one of the most artistically beautiful adaptations of a Lovecraft work to date (Vu is set to direct another Lovecraft adaptation THE DREAMLANDS next, which looks to be even more expansive). At times some of the acting is a bit lacking, but the visuals in DIE FARBE make up for it. DIE FARBE aka THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE is definitely a film that shows that Lovecraft’s work is not unfilmable. Vu’s talented eye makes every scene sing, and I can’t wait to see what kind of otherworldly horror the director has in store for us next.

DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL (2012)
Directed by Chris SunWritten by Chris Sun
Starring Michael Thomson, Billi Baker, Allira Jaques, Holly Phillips, Sean Gannon, Darrell Plumridge, Christian Radford, Mirko Grillini
Find out more about this film on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Don’t get me wrong. If I had a daughter and she was kidnapped, raped, and murdered, I might fantasize about trapping the killer in my basement and torturing him for days. On paper, DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL might seem like a film with some kind of message or maybe some kind of cathartic experience for the filmmakers if they, heaven forbid, ever lost a child, but that doesn’t necessarily make for an entertaining movie or a movie I really would want to watch. But since this is a review column and DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL is being released this month, watch it I had to do.

In no way am I feeling sorry for the abductor. The torture he goes through in this film is pretty deserved by anyone who would destroy a young life. But just as I don’t want to see the heinous act against the child (it is not shown in the film, thank god), I don’t really feel the need to see the torture of the kidnapper either.

The torture porn subgenre seems to have run its course, but occasionally a film like DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL surfaces and reminds you that there was a time when every other film was like this. I wasn’t a huge fan of the genre then, as it attempted to explain itself by saying it was conveying a message when in fact it only highlighted the torture and gore. Seeing a torture porn film now is like having someone show up to a dance club and doing the macarena, expecting people to act like it’s something fresh and new. The film will make you wince and groan at the acts committed by both the torturer and criminal. In that sense, I guess it is an effective torture porn film. DADDY’S LITTLE GIRL is capably acted, well shot, and deftly made, but with the bulk of the film focusing on the decimation of a body piece by piece, no matter how valid the reason, it’s still torture porn to me.

AFTER DEATH (2012)
Directed by Martin GoochWritten by Martin Gooch
Starring Claira Watson Parr, Ben Shockley, David Wayman, Nicola Goodchild, Leslie Phillips, Michael McKell, Linal Haft, David Acton
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug

When their elderly father Jeremiah (Leslie Phillips) passes away, his two sons and two daughters return to their childhood home to say goodbye and try to find out the mysterious events leading up to his death. Jeremiah being somewhat of a tinkerer and mad scientist, the events around his death are murky. But upon returning to their childhood home, the siblings begin acting as if they’ve never left, with old rivalries and alliances forming as if they’d never left and grown up.

There are some nice twists throughout this film, and the fantastical elements definitely become more prominent as the story goes on, but never does writer/director Martin Gooch go overboard with the otherworldly stuff to the point of throwing it off of being a wonderfully-acted snippet of a family coping with loss in their own special way. Horrific elements like ghosts, spirits trapped in machinery, and even the Grim Reaper himself show up, making it ok in my book for this one to be covered in this AICN HORROR column, but the best part of this film by far is the strength of the acting and the heartwarming scenes they play in.

DEAD WEIGHT (2012)
Directed by Adam Bartlett & John PataWritten by Adam Bartlett & John Pata
Starring Joe Belknap, Mary Lindberg, Michelle Courvais, Aaron Christensen, Sam Lenz, Jess Ader, Matty Field, Jake Martin, Mark Muetzel, Steve Herson, Cheri Sandlin, Fran St. Andre, Jason Ryf, Reva Fox, Adam Loper
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Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Some films blast out of the gates with goodness, while others take the slow burn route. With patience being on the minimum these days, I’m sure there might be a few of you who are likely to turn off a film midway if it’s not ticking all the marks for you. Me, I’m more of the patient sort, especially when it comes to horror, and it’s a good thing. Had I been the type to walk away from a film because of a rather slow start I might have shuffled past a film like DEAD WEIGHT, but had I done so, I would have missed out on a true indie gem.

The film opens on Charlie (Joe Belknap) as he slowly starts his day, shuffling through his morning routine zombie-like and hardly awake. His girlfriend Samantha (Mary Lindberg) calls him and tells him to turn on the news, and this is the first indication that something is wrong. Apparently, there are outbreaks of some kind all across the Midwest and with Charlie being in Toledo and Samantha being in Minnesota doing an internship, the couple immediately make a plan to meet somewhere in between. Thus begins a journey for Charlie to find his girlfriend. The story takes place between the barren present and the vibrantly colored past, which tells the tale of these two lovers in reverse, from their last words on the phone to one another to the first time they met. In between these scenes is Charlie’s arduous trek across the county, encountering infected humans, ill mannered rednecks, horrible weather, abandoned houses, and the limits of his own sanity. Teaming up with some other survivors, Charlie does what it takes for him to get to his girlfriend, no matter what the cost to his humanity.

DEAD WEIGHT is a film that picks up momentum in the last half despite its slow beginning, culminating in a finale that really took me by surprise at how impactful it was. While most great zombie films serve as a metaphor for something else, this one is a twisted little take on how long-distance relationships are often a difficult journey to take. While low budget, the film really does have a strong script and story, and the filmmakers seem to go out of their way to focus on the characters themselves rather than the spectacle of the zombies--so much so that you really don’t even see the zombies until the very end, but by that time, I was wrapped up in this post-apocalyptic tale of lost and found love. If you can look past the low-budget trappings, you’re likely to be impressed at the high-quality emotion and character of DEAD WEIGHT.

BLACK WATER VAMPIRE (2014)
Directed by Evan TramelWritten by Evan Tramel
Starring Danielle Lozeau, Andrea Monier, Anthony Fanelli, Robin Steffen, Bill Oberst Jr., Brandon deSpain
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Reviewed by Ambush Bug
While most films try to distance themselves from BLAIR WITCH PROJECT by avoiding some of the more annoying parts of that film (which I actually liked quite a bit, though I will admit that there are parts that make me want to stab my eyes out), BLACK WATER VAMPIRE is going to hope its viewers forgot about or never saw the fifteen year old film, since it’s basically the exact same film except instead of a witch there’s a vampire…oh, and it’s also in the snow.

The story focuses on one student reporter’s desire to find out the truth behind a man accused of sucking every drop of blood out of numerous girls found naked in the Black Water forest. Raymond Banks, the man accused of the murders, is played by Bill Oberst Jr. who gives the only performance worth a damn in this film. Oberst does loony well, and really shines in his brief appearance when the camera crew visits the prison he is set to be executed in. But once the four person crew of reporters venture into the icy forests, everything goes BLAIR WITCH with lots of shaky cams wandering around the woods, lots of scenes of people looking at maps and getting lost, and lots of murky shots in the night where we are searching for something but only get darkness. And lots and lots of screaming names in the woods.
Now, one thing that sets this film apart from BLAIR WITCH PROJECT is that we actually do get to see the monster here. We actually get to see lots of the monster, in clean and clear shots. I have to admit, the design of the vampire itself is pretty damn scary and I did jump a few times as the camera panned through the darkness and focusing on the warped creature screaming at the camera.

Had the opening scenes of BLACK WATER VAMPIRE explained that this footage we were about to see was recovered by the police and after investigation Raymond Banks was released from incarceration with little or no explanation given to the public, it would have been both intriguing and telling a story about the footage instead of just plopping it in front of us with no semblance of context or real world weight…but there I go rewriting bad movies again.
Ending with a scene so shamefully stolen from not only PARANORMAL ACTIVITY by also ROSEMARY’S BABY if you can believe it, BLACK WATER VAMPIRE owes a lot to a lot of much better films. Lacking real direction, originality, and even an accurate depiction of a vampire, I recommend passing over BLACK WATER VAMPIRE if you cross its path some dark snowy night, because according to film, that’s where vampires like to hang.

VIKINGDOM (2013)
Directed by Yusry Abd HalimWritten by James Coyne
Starring Dominic Purcell, Natassia Malthe, Conan Stevens, Craig Fairbrass, Jon Foo, Ron Smoorenburg, Jesse Moss, Patrick Murray, Tegan Moss, Byron Gibson, Trevor Coppola, Geoffrey Giuliano, Anteo Quintavalle, John Reynolds
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug

The story follows a Viking named Eirick (PRISON BREAK’s Dominic Purcell) as he tracks down a magical horn to stop the tirade of a lost god who refuses to die as worship of the Norse Gods fades and Christianity spreads across the land. In the opening scene, Eirick falls in battle and names his brother the new king, but his lover, the goddess Freya (Tegan Moss), brings him back from the realm of the dead so that the world isn’t taken back into the old dark days. This is a story about a quest and a noble battle. The stakes are as high as the drama. If only this film lived up to all of that.


The second most unintentionally hilarious thing in VIKINGDOM is the horrid wig work. Everyone except Dominic Purcell, who seems to have grown his hair out for the role in an attempt at method acting, wears the worst wigs this side of a Tyler Perry film, making the entire Viking army who are supposed to be badasses look more like drag queens. The cosplay costuming doesn’t help much, either.

I think if the filmmakers were to have approached this as more of an intentional comedy, it would have been more successful. As is, VIKINGDOM wants to be so many other films (CONAN, THOR, 300, BRAVEHEART, LORD OF THE RINGS), but really fails to live up to any of them. Director Yusry Abd Halim seems to be shooting for the moon here, as the runtime is almost two hours bookended by a screeching metal soundtrack. So that’s two full hours for you and your friends to down booze and make sharp remarks at this film. Overly serious and utterly ridiculous, VIKINGDOM is good for some unintentional hilarity and a few fun and brutal battle scenes, but nothing much else.

BAD MILO (2013)
aka MILODirected by Jacob Vaughan
Written by Benjamin Hayes, Jacob Vaughan
Starring Ken Marino, Gillian Jacobs, Patrick Warburton, Peter Stormare, Stephen Root, Mary Kay Place, Toby Huss, Jonathan Daniel Brown, Kumail Nanjiani, Diana Toshiko
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
More reminiscent of the stylings of Frank Hennenlotter’s BASKET CASE and BRAIN DAMAGE than David Cronenberg’s more serious and disturbing body horrors, BAD MILO is surprising in a lot of ways in that it deals with a pretty gross and potentially hilarious subject while offering up a little heart as well.

Sorry, I had to say it.
As I said in the opening paragraph, BAD MILO surprised me in that, though it’s about a butt monster, it’s a surprisingly heartfelt tale with Marino and Jacobs actually giving some sincere performances playing a couple who love each other despite a physical ailment. It’s kind of a beautiful tale of tolerance and acceptance, two things I didn’t see coming from what I had heard about the film and the humor I often expect when THE STATE alum are involved. Milo himself is actually pretty damn cute and lovable, though I’m sure he smells pretty bad with the combination of puppetry and CG making the little guy look damn near alive.

While the humor is there, it’s not as over the top as I expected, either. I laughed quite a bit at the well-timed jokes and scenarios played out by the extremely talented cast--especially Patrick Warburton, Mary Kay Place, and Stephen Root, but also Peter Stormare as an open-minded psychologist and Toby Huss as a no nonsense-talking doctor. But as offbeat as the concept of the film is, things are pretty safely played as far as the poop humor is concerned. That’s not to say this film doesn’t go full-on with the gore and red stuff, but for the most part this film, which could have more than likely turned the stomach, instead surprisingly warmed my heart. So if you’re looking to go into this one to find a gross-out comedy, I think you’ll be shocked at how sweet this little stinker of a movie is.

limp. (2013)
Directed by Shaun RyanWritten by Shaun Ryan
Starring Eoin Quinn, Anne Gill, Jack Dean-Shepherd, Laura Canavan Hayes, Shane Lennon, Sinead O'Riordan,
Find out more about this film on Facebook here
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
I never thought I’d use the word “breathtaking” to describe a film about a necrophiliac, but never say never, I guess.

Eion Quinn plays Mr. Grot, an introverted man who has difficulty connecting with the real world. This is quite obvious when we first see him staring at a couple openly being affectionate in a restaurant. When his staring is noticed, the man threatens Grot, who cowers at the aggression. Little do they know that at home, the quiet man has a dead woman laying in his bed. Ryan takes us through mundane scenes of Grot dressing the dead woman in a gown he just purchased, dancing with her, setting her up at dinner, taking part in sparkling conversation, and, of course, making love to her. While this sounds disgusting, Ryan refuses to make it so as he switches between realities to show the woman in an animated state through Grot’s eyes and then back to the real world where he’s interacting with a corpse. But as the dead woman (played by Anne Gill) begins to rot, so does both Grot’s sanity and his relationship with her.

Despite its hour-long runtime, there may be some who get bored with the slow pace of limp. as the film really takes its time to develop. But through this patient filmmaking you are sucked into the life of Grot, and dammit if this film doesn’t make you feel sorry for this disgusting little man despite the laws and taboos he breaks. limp. is a film that will fill you with unease making such a heinous act so damn engrossing and, hell, I’ll say it--endearing. Filmmaker Shaun Ryan is a true find and I can’t wait to see where his patient eye for the beautiful and the uncanny will take me next.
And finally…one more time with THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE, this time it’s a reading from the original story by HP Lovecraft. Enjoy this Lovecraft Radio Drama of THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE!!!
See ya next week, folks!




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