You have all seen that trailer where Warren Beatty begins spouting the most politically incorrect political speech in history. Well here are two reviews of a test screening that occurred last night. These reviews came from Goldfinger and the Mighty Joe Hallenbeck. We are all familiar with Hallenbeck's foray's into the politically incorrect, so he shoulda loved the film, but didn't. Both reviews are negative, and the opinions of the following reviewers, not me. If you loved Bulworth, or even just liked it and want to 'retort', then please, by all means, send a strong review in. Till then here's Goldfinger...
So there I was, Auric Goldfinger, wandering around Marina Del Rey, where I parked my yacht. I happened upon an old man selling watches, and he asked me if I knew about the screening. "What screening?" I asked. He then informed me that a high-level screening was to take place later that evening in Marina Del Rey, and he had some extra passes.
I asked for the passes, and before my very eyes the old man revealed himself to be none other than Joe Hallenbeck, and his dog Flunky Sidekick. Impressed by my comerade's charade, we proceded to thwart the evil NRG henchment and work our way into the theater.
BULLWORTH stars Warren Beaty as a California Senator running for re-election, but he has a nervous breakdown two days before the primary, and starts being honest. See, he's been accepting money for legislation, and starts to reveal it. At the same time, for reasons unkown, he has taken out a large life insurance policy on himself - and then hires a hitman to have himself killed.
There were some very funny moments in this film, some of which had me rolling with laughter. Unfortunately, after the 20th time we see Warren Beaty rap, it's painful. The storyline was alright, although there were more questions than answers as to WHY Bullworth wanted himself killed, and why he suddenly embraces the African-American community in Los Angeles. (And it should be pointed out that in this film, LA is comprised of rich white people, and lower-class blacks.There are no other minorities or races represented - okay, maybe a few, but they practically don't exist.)
For a film essentially geared at blacks, this film does more to insult and segregate them than any other films I've seen in a while. So see Bullworth for the jokes, but do so on video - especially if someone ELSE rents it for you!
Goldfinger
and here's Hallenbeck's review. Now this will be a refreshing departure from Hallenbeck's usual run of 20 or 30 'swear' words in a paragraph. In the following review, he swears only once. Yes, the sky is falling, the world is ending and indeed Zsa Zsa is due for a comeback. This doesn't mean though that Hallenbeck is steering clear of controversy. Perish the thought, he has just learned how to review films in a fashion equal to the passion they inspire him to write. You will notice he toiled over this review and was kind enough to leave out spoilers.
Here's my review of BULWORTH. Please post it up in it's entirety:
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
FUCKIN' SUCKED!
T.T.F.N.,
Joe Hallenbeck
