Father Geek here with Euro-AICN's lucky 13th regular weekly column. And what a column it is with starstudded reports filed from Hungary, Yugoslavia, Ireland, Spain, Germany, France, and England. You know I am at a lost as to why we have gotten next to nothing in the way of reports out of Italy over the course of these 13 columns. I always considered Italy to have one of the world's strongest film industries, yet no one has reported from there on a regular basis. Come on, I know someone in the land of Fellini and Bava, of Leone and Fulci and Carlo Ponti is bound to know lots of interesting information they can share with our readers. Send it to our editors in Paris , the world wants to know what's happening in sunny Italy.

EURO AICN 13

by Darth Bond & Edgard

It's us again... lucky us in France because it was a long long week-end of four days... no work, no rain, no reason to worry... We hope things went also well in Austin for the Baby Shower... Darth Bond and I tried to steal a Concord to get there, and actually we did quite well, we had the plane and everything ready... but we just remembered that none of us could fly the super sonic jet... so we just... well, we didn't do it. So again, all the Euro-AICN office crew wishes the best to Sister Satan... As a coincidence ("coincidence ?? I think not !!") it's our 13th edition... let's hope it's a lucky sign for you !

As you will see this week we have a long long long section devoted to Ozymandias and his crazy news... that should make you happy (or pray that some of these projects are not for real). No Euro Pick or Quiz this time then...

FRANCE

* Gina Gershon will join Domenica Scorsese (Marty's daughter seen in CAPE FEAR and THE AGE OF INNOCENCE) , Anouk Aimée, Carmen Chaplin and Lydia Andrei ("Victor pendant qu'il est trop tard") in BLOOMING FLOWERS, a comedy about a porn director who falls in love with his main actress. Jonathan Zaccai directs. The film will be English-spoken.

* Composer Michel Legrand will adapt the "Dreyfus Case" for the theatre, director Claude Lelouch will direct.

* French producer Alain Goldman (VATEL) is preparing a film on Raspoutine and hopes to get Paul Verhoeven for it...Personally I would love to see Verhoeven work in Europe again.

* Check right here if you want to know more about a very cool heroic-fantasy film project... the crew behind this film is looking for a little help, so please if you're interested... just click !

* If you live in France and if you are interested to learn more about script writing, this is for you : on June 16th and 17th in Lyon, a two days workshop on scriptwriting is organised with movie professionals. To know more, please contact: Villa Gillet - Parc de la Cerisaie - 25, rue Chazière 69004 Lyon - Tel.: 04 72 98 08 98 - Fax: 04 72 98 08 99.

* You live in Paris and you're fan of Brian De Palma ? Then forget about MISSION TO MARS (I know, once you 've seen it, it's quite hard to forget about the end) and get to the Max Linder Panorama theatre on June 7th at 8.00 pm to see OBSESSION in presence of the director himself. DRESSED TO KILL and BLOW OUT will also be screened in this theatre next week.

* Edgard's hot tickets for the fall in France are : Christophe Gans'THE BROTHERHOOD OF WOLVES (we talked about it a lot already) and LES RIVIERES POURPRES ("The Purple Rivers"), a thriller from Matthieu Kassovitz (LA HAINE), with Jean Reno and Vincent Cassel (LA HAINE, DOBERMANN). A first teaser is proposed on the official website (not yet fully opened) at this Web address. Movie magazine Cine Live reports that an American remake of this film would already be in preparation, as a remake for Luc Besson's production TAXI (that's not really a surprise).

* Talking about Besson, a new film from his production company will open this wednesday in France. As always, we don't know much about THE DANCER (as Besson keeps everything secret) except it's a "music & dance" film in the tradition of FLASHDANCE or FOOTLOOSE... Hopefully we will know more next week.

* And to conclude these French news items, you can also check right here if you want to know more about the first "French SCREAM"... It'll be in French theatres on June 14th.... But the website is kinda cool...

UK

* Check the Empire website at this location if you want to know more (or see the trailer) about the new film GANGSTER N°1, coming out next week in UK.

* HONEST the over-hyped film from Dave Stewart which stars three of All Saints, has been a dismal failure at the box office. On its opening weekend the film only took £111,309, leaving it in 12th position, behind the likes of "Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo" and "Stir Of Echoes", both of which opened on the same day. Despite a wealth of publicity for the film, it has recieved a battering from critics and a lot of teenage All Saints fans are unable to see it because of its 18 certificate. A spokesperson for the film's distributor, Pathe, said they were, "very disappointed," with the result. HONEST, which cost £4.2 million to make, is unlikely to recoup even a quarter of its budget as it will only be showing on 60 screens from this week, a massive drop from its opening in 220 cinemas. So future profits are likely to be even less than on the dismal opening weekend. Director Stewart has railed against the film's 18 certificate and has criticised the press for their negative reviews. But then, they're some of the few who've actually seen it. (souce : EMPIRE)

* Schnorbitz here in Cambridge. Amazingly, there is one little scoop that came through to me. Stephen Fry had to withdraw from a dinner with the well-known student comedy company Footlights in a week's time, as he is involved with writing and directing an adaption of the Evelyn Waugh novel Vile Bodies. An e-mail from the producer, a Ms Miranda Davis at Wonderfilm, has also made its way around the University society. She writes that she is looking for "a young actress to play Nina, the female lead - and only Nina." I don't know anything about the novel, but it seems as though they're after a completely fresh face for this character. The poor old president of Footlights has now got a week to find a replacement celebrity in the East Anglian area.

YUGOSLAVIA

* Dima informs us that Sergej Trifunovic`s gig in the new Spike Lee joint is getting a precise shape.It is going to be a movie about a NYC cab driver and his experiences.In the first draft Trifunovic`s part was a role of an Albanian who is a refugee from Mostar and Mostar is in war-torn Bosnia where Albianians actually don`t live. So Trifunovic who was by the way born in Mostar, but never lived there, suggested that the character should be a Serb and the suggestion was accepted. The character will have a name of Trifunovic`s uncle. His co-star in this movie will be Danny Glover. Spike Lee will only be the producer and the movie will be directed by his longtime assistant James Lee Davis. (note from Edgard : I found out this movie's title : "Thr 3 A.M.", Pam Grier will also co-star).

HUNGARY

* Hungary's National Cultural Heritage Ministry has awarded a total of 150m forints ($535,000) to six feature projects which it has deemed representative of Hungarian life. The projects were chosen as part of a competition held to mark the end of the millennium. The first project, "Peter Kukac From Nagyapat Is Going To Heaven", is already completed and has been presented to a small audience at the Hungarian Film Festival. The film, co-directed by Zoltan Bicskei and Jozsef Nagy, is based on the life of painter Peter Kukac. The other projects to receive Heritage Ministry funding are either in pre-production or development. They include: "Hey, The Sorrow Of Loss", a love story written by Szabolcs Hajdu, "Pizza Man", written and to be directed by Gyorgy Balogh, about a pizza delivery man coming into contact with all stratas of Hungarian society. "Hungarian Trilogy", a series of three films to be directed by Gabor Dettre, Zoltan Kamondi and Tamas Toth. Dettre's project, "A Journey to Venice", is an experimental love story in the Dogme mould. Kamondi's film, "Honeycommand", is about the relationship between a rich Hungarian boy and a gypsy girl. Toth's "Gavril"o is about terrorism. An unnamed project from Csaba Kael based on the ballad of a girl who danced to death. The ballad will be performed by Hungarian folk singer Marta Sebestyen who featured on the soundtrack of The English Patient. "Grey Heron", to be directed by Szabolcs Tolnai and produced by Gyorgy Durst, which like Pizza Man aims to present a cross-section of Hungarian society. (source : Screendaily)

SPAIN

* The only good thing in ASTERIX was probably Laetitia Casta (not the way she was acting, just her), so Laetitia fans check this out. This is the website of her new film GITANO, directed by Manuel Palacios and with Joaquin Cortés.

GERMANY

* Brett gives us more information on the accident that happened on the set of ENEMY AT THE GATES : "I have contacted the newspaper which printed the article about an uncontrolled explosion on set and they told me the: the guy who had already handled all explosions on the set so far was supposed to destroy some left-over explosives, when they suddenly exploded. He was heavily injured on his left leg and could have died because of blood-loss. He's still at the hospital today. The accident happened on May 16th and NO actors have been injured".

OZYMANDIAS NEWS

* Steeeeeerange or what???? : "He was the son of America's most loved post-war president and a glamorous, intelligent raconteur in his own right. But John F Kennedy Jr was a flawed political gem and a playboy who had real problms keeping his hands off women - even if they were married. And Washington is preparing itself to be further stunned by fresh revelations in the £40 million biopic "Like Father, Like Son" suggesting that Kennedy Jr was executed last year by the lovechild of Lee Harvey Oswald.. Former ER heartthrob George Clooney who can now command up to £10 million a film is being lined up to take the lead role with new screen beauties Charlize Theron and Cameron Diaz in the running to play his wife Carolyn. The script of the adventure is currently in pre-production stage and reveals that Oswald had an affair with a waitress later leaving his illegitimate offspring hellbent on seeking revenge on the Kennedy clan and fanatical in his belief of his father's innocence in the killing. The film, being plotted by the giant Miramax company which scooped five Oscars for American Beauty and Paramount, builds to a climax in which the assassin's identity finally becomes known.. In a plot line reminiscent of The Day of the Jackal, crack CIA operatives race to a cliff-top house on Long Island where he is about to launch a heat-seeking missile with the aid of fanatical Arab terrorists. The film is scheduled to go into production next spring". (from the Press Association).

* This wouldn't have happened if they'd come to film here in Ireland..... Ah who am I kidding? It probably would.... : "Gypsy gangs are threatening to wreck STEVEN SPIELBERG's new war mini-series after illegally moving onto land adjoining the set of BAND OF BROTHERS in Hatfield. Just weeks after Spielberg met with British Prime Minister TONY BLAIR for secret talks about the development of the Hatfield studios, where he also filmed parts of Saving Private Ryan, travellers are ripping up hedgerows and using the area as a dumping ground for litter. Local authorities are desperately trying to find ways of moving the gypsies on before filming is disturbed. HATFIELD TOWN COUNCIL clerk PAUL WIDDECOMBE says, "The gypsies have been moving around the district for the last six weeks and now they've set up close to the Band of Brothers site. There will be action taken to move them on but it's a slow process. It has been used as a gypsy site before and they obviously want to be there, but we don't want potential developers and people looking to invest in the land to be put off by the travellers who are damaging..." (from WENN).

* Only saw Liz and Clift on a documentary the BBC were showing the other night - don't know quite if I can see this one..... : Catherine Zeta Jones has become the frontrunner to star as Elizabeth Taylor in the biopic of Montgomery Clift's life. The pair starred in 'A Place In The Sun' in 1951 and became great friends. Clift died back in 1966 at the early age of 45. As La Liz is very much alive and kicking she is playing consultant to the movie and is said to approve the choice of Zeta Jones. 'American Beauty' star Wes Bentley has already signed up to star as Clift. If Zeta Jones does come on board, filming will have to wait a while until after she gives birth to her first baby this summer." (from Popcorn).

* "Leading Hollywood stars including Gwyneth Paltrow and Winona Ryder are queuing up for parts in a film version of Frances Mayes's bestseller Under the Tuscan Sun which is being made by the same company that created Shakespeare in Love. Miramax has bought the rights to the deeply poignant, romantic factual book which figured in the New York Times bestseller list for two years and has already given rise to two spin-offs. The same team that made The Talented Mr Ripley and Il Postino is being assembled to launch the project and observers predict much cat-fighting to secure the two female lead parts".

* Neil Jordan is to write and direct 'Lucrezia', the story of the powerful and infamous Borgia family who lived the high life in Renaissance Italy. The writer-director, who was nominated at this year's Oscars for his adaptation of the Graham Greene novel 'The End Of The Affair', will pen the original script for the project which will centre on Lucrezia Borgia (1480-1519), widely considered the most glamorous but vindictive of the clan. She was the daughter of a Borgia Pope and lived a colourful life, complete with three marriages, accusations of incest and an orgy thrown at the Vatican. Jordan won an Oscar for best original screenplay for his movie 'The Crying Game' and went on to write and direct 'Michael Collins' and 'Interview With A Vampire'.

* Unfortunately this one won't mean much to anyone outside of the UK or Ireland but I can't wait!! : "Irish Comic Graham Norton has been slated to star in a gay version of the movie Green Card. Channel 4 has commissioned a 90-minute TV film, provisionally titled Pink Card, from Eurotrash producer Rapido TV. The film will be based on Norton's own experiences with his American boyfriend. A script, by Gimme Gimme Gimme writer Jonathan Harvey, is expected this summer. Norton surprised pundits by winning the Bafta award for best entertainment performance last month for his Channel 4 chat show So Graham Norton.

* You can see it now can't you? "My horse, my horse, my kingdom for uh..... uhhhhhhh........... Line!" : Action film superstar Sylvester Stallone wants to appear in a West End play according to reports. The star of Rocky and Rambo is said to have been in touch with one of London's top theatrical agents asking him to keep a look-out for parts, reports the Daily Express. The unnamed agent said: "We've been asked to find out if there are any suitable projects floating around for him. "Its a credibility thing and he wants to do a British stage play." Theatre critic Sheridan Morley said: "Let's not knock him. There are a lot of things he could do wonderfully. I grant you it's probably not going to be in Shakespeare, Shaw or Wilde."

* From Popcorn : "Kristin Scott Thomas as a downtrodden Glaswegian housewife who avoids her abusive husband with the help of an expert in cybernetics addicted to violent pornography? Well, anything is possible. The Paris-based actress has just optioned the rights to Scottish author AL Kennedy's acclaimed novel, 'Original Bliss'. Scott Thomas could be lining herself up for the lead role of Helen Brindle, a woman who has lost her 'original bliss' - the ability to pray and have her prayers answered. After seeing confident cybernetics expert Edward E. Gluck on the television, Helen arranges an impulse trip to Stuttgart where he is participating in a conference. There she discovers not only that he enjoys violent pornography, but also that they are kindred spirits. The film will be made by the actress' production outfit, Kristin Scott Thomas Productions. But pregnant Scott Thomas will have to have her baby before she can go into production on the film. Which will also give the star of The English Patient plenty of time to work on getting rid of that cut-glass accent...

* Ah, now this one will have to go down in the great "close but no cigar" files.... Charlotte C on E..... "Singing star Charlotte Church was offered the chance of a major Hollywood film role - as a teenage junkie. But the 14-year-old soprano, who has made around £10 million through her music, decided it would be a bad career move. She told the July edition of Q magazine: "It wasn't quite the image we were going for." Church was offered the role as a 15-year-old drug user alongside two major stars after signing up with the respected William Morris Agency in Los Angeles. However, the canny teenager, who hates even alcohol except for a measure of Bailey's at Christmas, said: "I'm sure I could have done it but it wasn't right. "We don't want to rush into anything and make a bad choice - we're quite happy to wait until the right project comes along. And we're sure it will." The singer became an international hit through her two albums Voice Of An Angel and Charlotte Church. She even conquered the US - an achievement neither Oasis nor Robbie Williams has managed".

* The latest for all our British chums about the casting goings on for the movie of the (highly overrated I might add!!) book Bridget Jones Diary: "Rumblings over American starlet Renee Zellweger being handed the role of Bridget Jones in a new movie version of Helen Fielding's best-selling novel have subsided now True Brits have been called into action. The makers of the movie, Working Title - who created Four Weddings and a Funeral and Notting Hill, have gone for a home-grown line-up to accompany Jim Carrey's blonde girlfriend on her perplexing journey. Senior sources at the actors union Equity expressed dismay that Renee had been cast in the role of the weight obsessed, lovelorn heroine to appease Americans backers. She spent three weeks researching the role at a publishing house but expressed her quiet amazement at being offered the job. She said: "It's a dream opportunity and I'm genuinely sorry if I have put any noses out of joint." Now, apart from dashing co-star Hugh Grant being cast as Daniel Cleaver, her mumbling object of desire, the cream of stage and screen are also in the line-up. Darcy is literally back as Darcy, in this case Mark Darcy. Colin Firth, late of Pride and Prejudice, will play the not so sparky lad Bridget's mum sets her up with. Sally Phillips from the Channel 4 comedy series Smack the Pony plays her best friend Shazzer and Gemma Jones and Jim Broadbent are in pole position as her parents. Also on board the project are Scottish starlet Shirley Henderson as her high-flying pal Jude, Celia Imrie as her posh neighbour and James Callis, recently seen in Sex, Chips and Rock 'n' Roll as her gay, bitchy male chum. A source on the movie said: "We suffered a lot of flak, especially from casting agents and producers, over our choice of lead lady but there were certain financial considerations and Renee is just excellent."

* Robert Carlyle is set to take the lead role in a film about an Irish soldier who spent most of the First World War confined to a cupboard in a French farmhouse. Close Quarters is the remarkable true story of Dublin-born Private Patrick Fowler who separated from the 11th Hussars light cavalry regiment after a battle in 1914. He survived for months in a wood near the town of Cambrai, on the Belgian border. The £3m film will be made by Bill Shepherd productions, the company that made Mrs Galloway in 1998. "We've met and had lunch and talked about it and he (Carlyle) wants to do it," Bill Shepherd told Ananova. The movie begins shooting in the autumn at Shepperton Studios in Middlesex and on location in France. Private Fowler was found in the woods by a man who took him to the relative safety of his mother-in-law's home nearby. For the next three-and-a-half years he hid in the cupboard off the sitting room from where he was able to observe the German troops who'd taken over the property. It was only at night, as the Germans slept, that Private Fowler was able to move from the cupboard to eat with Angele Belmont Gobert and her daughter. Just before the defeat of Germany Fowler, who died in Scotland in 1964 - aged 90, was moved to the safety of a barn where he was later freed by British soldiers.

* Josh Hartnett ('The Faculty', 'The Virgin Suicides') is in talks to star in the celibate comedy '40 Days And 40 Nights'.If he signs up he would play a man who after a serious relationship failure, decides to give up the fairer sex for Lent. The trouble is halfway through he meets the girl of his dreams but cannot do anything about it. Ashton Kutcher ('Down To You') had been originally lined up for the role, but he had to pull out due to commitments on the television programme 'That 70's Show'. Hartnett became available while the script was going through a touch-up session. It remains to be seen whether Katie Holmes is to play his dream girl. She is due to star but, like Kutcher, may find her ties with 'Dawson's Creek' getting in the way of the schedule.

* Today's Star here reports that an Irish couple are furious that a studio movie in development bares a resemblance to their lives and that they aren't involved. A couple of years ago when Julia Roberts was on the run after she ditched Keifer Sutherland she turned up here and was trying to avoid the world's press at the Shelbourne Hotel and was picked up by chauffeur Mick Devine and hidden in his house in Tallaght. Since then Devine and his wife have become friends with the actress (once visiting her in the US). Limo Man is set to star Melanie Griffith as a Hollywood star who falls in love with a Walkinstown cabbie to be played by Brendan Gleeson (The General, Braveheart, Mission: Impossible 2) and Devine and his wife aren't too happy about the co-incidences in the two stories. Barry Devlin is set to direct with Bono being approached to play a cameo role as a nightclub singer that serenades the couple...

The same paper reports that Ewan McGregor is the frontrunner to play JFK Jnr in Fox's upcoming biopic with Freddie Prinze Jnr., Patrick Dempsey and Billy Crudup also in contention...

Also Jim Sheridan is trying to land Salma Hayek, Ed Norton and Ashley Judd for his adaptation of Nicholas Sparks novel The Notebook. He's also trying to convince Paul Newman to join the cast as the great man says he'd like to play one more role before retirement...

Thanks a million to everyone who's been mailing me from my part of the world with goss, production info, suggestions and even one guy who's mailed me his screenplay and asked me for an opinion!!!! As usual for any of our friends working in the Irish or UK film industries who have anything to pass on I'd love to hear from them here at my Dublin Penthouse Offices .

MEA CULPA

No, as you probably guessed it, this is not the name of a new European country (but again, you never know), this is just to apologize to the distributors of "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." We made a mistake concerning the distributors in Europe, so here's the truth : Warner only has the rights in France and they did not produce the film. Sony Pictures Classics is releasing the film in the U.S. and Columbia Pictures Film Production Asia is handling the Asian release.

Well that's it for this week folks... don't forget to send us A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G (news, reviews, ideas, pictures, scripts, jokes, money... whatever) at our Euro-AICN offices here in the heart of France.

See you next week !!