Greetings, all. Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. Let’s get right on with the scary!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
SNOW SHARK: ANCIENT SNOW BEAST (2011)
COME & GET ME (2011)
CROCZILLA (2012)
VAMP U (2013)
SMILEY (2012)
MIMESIS: NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (2011)
WOULD YOU RATHER? (2012)
And finally…Patrick Rea’s COPY!

SNOW SHARK: ANCIENT SNOW BEAST (2011)
Directed by Sam QualianaWritten by Sam Qualiana
Starring Andrew Elias, Michael O'Hear, Sam Qualiana, Jackey Hall, Bob Bozek, John Renna
Find out more about this film on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Right off the bat, the one thing you need to know is that SNOW SHARK: ANCIENT SNOW BEAST is a very low budget movie. Though some nice CGI were integrated into the film in post, it definitely looks and feels like something shot and made on a micro-budget. That said, if you’re willing to look past that, it ain’t all that bad.


The fact that there were so many parts also might have to do with the low budget as well as it feels people just wanted a line or two just to get to say they were in a movie, which kind of endears me to low budget films like this.

SNOW SHARK may be on the budgetary low, but there is a lot of fun to be had if you look past the miniscule budget. With an obvious love for JAWS oozing out of its pores, those with an open mind will be able to agree with this film’s admiration for that inspirational film and find themselves attracted to it.

COME & GET ME (2011)
Directed by Chris SunWritten by Chris Sun
Starring Christian Radford, Shaun Trainer, Alexis Fernandez, Kelsie Mcdonald, Christopher Price, Allira Jaques, Sarah Jane Blair, Jess Taylor, Chris Thomas
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
This is just an ugly little movie. If the goal of COME & GET ME was to make me feel queasy at the amount of mistreatment that occurs in this film toward women, then it succeeded in spades. But though this film may want to pay homage to such rape-sploitation films as I SPIT ON YOUR GRAVE and LAST HOUSE ON THE LEFT, it feels as if the attention to the violence is somewhat misguided.

In COME & GET ME, there’s none of that creativity when it comes to the redemption of the victims. Here it is just utter brutality towards a group of women who happen to make the wrong call to the wrong group of guys. Sure, this may ring as more realistic and less poetic, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s more entertaining.

The main thing that bothered me with this film is the lack of effort put into the script. I lost count of the amount of times the single words “Bitch!” or “Slag!” or “Cunt!” was used. Sure, there are times when a single exclamation is appropriate and necessary, but when the latter 40 minutes of the film consist mainly of these three words shouted over and over, it gets ponderous.
COME & GET ME is the type of film that is unflinching in its brutality. It offers up an ugly look at some ugly-thinking men who just happen to be pretty ugly, coincidentally. But whereas other films in this subgenre attempt at least to include some story, theme, and nuance into the mix, this one settles on sticking to the violence, which ultimately makes it less interesting.

CROCZILLA (2012)
aka MILLION DOLLAR CROCODILEDirected by Li Sheng Lin
Written by Li Sheng Lin
Starring Barbie Hsu, Guo Tao, Lin Xue, Shi Zhaoqi, Xiong Xinxin, Ding Jiali
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
I loved this little Chinese ode to B movies. Sure it’s got a goofy little kid who loves a giant crocodile, but how is that any different than keeping two little fairies in a cage singing to a giant monster? In CROCZILLA aka MILLION DOLLAR CROCODILE, at least this film knows it is a goofy B movie, and that’s the reason I liked it so much.

There’s nothing original about this story, but director Li Sheng Lin injects just the right amount of goofy humor (with accompanying goofy music) and just the right amount of effects and thrills to make it all entertaining. As the original LAKE PLACID did a few years ago, CROCZILLA knows that the audience has come to see a giant croc, and that’s what the story delivers for most of the film. There’s an especially effective scene where the croc-loving kid and an Olive Oyl-type annoying woman are bound upside down as bait for the croc that is actually quite thrilling in the way it is all set up, and this is just one of the numerous well-directed scenes of croc tension.

I have definitely seen worse croc horror films with much worse special effects. Though the title CROCZILLA isn’t the type that instills a lot of confidence and there is an annoying kid who likes to scream “AMAO! AMAO!” over and over, some clever direction and a damn convincing croc make CROCZILLA one of the better B movies I’ve seen in a while.

VAMP U (2013)
Directed by Matt Jespersen, Maclain NelsonWritten by Matt Jespersen, Maclain Nelson
Starring Adam Johnson, Julie Gonzalo, Gary Cole, Maclain Nelson, Alexis Knapp, Matt Mattson
Find out more about these films here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
There are a few vampire comedies that I actually like. LOVE AT FIRST BITE, ONCE BITTEN…I’m probably blanking on a few. But more often than not, when someone wants to splice horror with vamps, one ends up with DRACULA: DEAD AND LOVING IT rather than anything worthwhile. That’s why I wasn’t really looking forward to checking out VAMP U, but after seeing it, I’d definitely lump this one in with the former films I mentioned rather than the latter.

The comedy mainly comes from the blasé way the actors deliver their lines and how nonchalant they are about the fact that their girlfriends are being turned into vampires. It’s as if these guys are so jaded from oversaturation of pop culture vampires that it’s not really a surprise that they exist. The would-be student vamp hunters played by Matt Mattson and Maclain Nelson were hilarious throughout this film, though they weren’t the stars of the film. Seeing these two bumble through Van Helsing territory had me chuckling throughout.

While the ending is a bit heavy-handed, the tone of the film keeps it light and snarky throughout. Now, I don’t guarantee a lot of gore and blood in this film, though there is some. And I don’t guarantee a lot of scares…because there aren’t. But I do think that the humor in VAMP U drives a stake into the heart of your funny bone about 75% of the time, and with shitty parody films like A HAUNTED HOUSE and SCARY MOVIE 345 striking out over and over every time they step to the plate, when it comes to horror comedies, I think 75% ain’t half bad. I was surprised at how funny this film is, and I think you might too.

SMILEY (2011)
Directed by Michael GallagherWritten by Michael Gallagher and Glasgow Phillips
Starring Caitlin Gerard, Melanie Papalia, Shane Dawson, Toby Turner, Roger Bart, & Keith David
Find out more about this film here! Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Seems trying to cash in on a new serial killer franchise will never go out of style. The problem is, the formula is so over-done that by following it, one automatically shoots oneself in the foot. That’s pretty much the case with SMILEY.

The main problem with SMILEY is that by being so up to the minute with technology, it is almost assured that it will be out of touch and obsolete by the time the film is made and seen by the public. Seeing the chatrooms and old timey cell phones (I say “old timey” facetiously, since the phones used aren’t iPhones) used by the characters is bound to date this film and make it seem like a relic despite the fact that it was only made last year.

A techno CANDYMAN, Smiley appears to members in a chatroom after someone types “I did it for the lulz!” three times. Yes, I know, seems dumb--just as dumb as Bloody Mary and Candyman, I guess. Still, director/writer Michael Gallagher is able to throw in a few decent jump scares along the way. Sure most are predictable, but there are some capably orchestrated scenes of our final girl encountering this fiend on the interwebbies.

In the end, I doubt SMILEY is the start of a franchise it desperately wants to be. With a couple of decent kills and a pair of strong leads, that still wasn’t enough to make the smiley-faced murderer stand out. With an ambiguous ending which really doesn’t answer anything and even betrays its own logic for the sake of shock, SMILEY left me with more of a than a .

MIMESIS: NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD (2011)
aka MIMESIS, MIMESIS: PLAY DEADDirected by Douglas Schulze
Written by Douglas Schulze & Josh Wagner
Starring Allen Maldonado, Sid Haig, Lauren Mae Shafer, Courtney Gains, Taylor Piedmonte, David G.B. Brown, Jana Thompson, Gavin Grazer
Find out more about this film here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
So you don’t have to look it up, the mimesis in the title of this film refers to “life imitating art”, an interesting subject, and this film touches on this weighty theme throughout. In this day and age where films are labeled as the cause of tragedies and bad decisions made by flawed human beings, the scenario that plays out in MIMESIS: NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD doesn’t really seem that crazy.

As with SCREAM and CABIN IN THE WOODS, which goes pretty meta with horror movie tropes, MIMESIS is actually a pretty smart little film. Though some of the acting isn’t top tier, the film makes up for it with a solid idea of “what if someone went to painful measures to recreate all of the factors to make a real life horror movie”. The result has the group questioning what is real and what is horror movie makeup as they seem to be cast as characters from the movie and are being picked off in a way very similar to the Romero film.

There’s some thinkin’ that went into MIMESIS: NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD, something more horror needs to do, I feel. It’s not just a zombie movie or a serial killer film. It’s got a few more layers than that and a smart horror film is worth checking out in my book.

WOULD YOU RATHER? (2012)
Directed by David Guy LevyWritten by Steffen Schlachtenhaufen
Starring Brittany Snow, Jeffrey Combs, Jonny Coyne, Lawrence Gilliard Jr., Enver Gjokaj, Sasha Grey, John Heard, Logan Miller
Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
While basically this is yet another version of the SAW franchise set to the game Would You Rather?, where participants are forced to choose to do one of two suggested horrible or heinous acts, this new film from IFC Midnight (a company who usually offers up some of the more top tier horror these days) is actually a decent little morality tale.

Though the challenges aren’t that original or shocking, what makes this film interesting are the characters established and how Combs pushes them to choose who they inflict torture on in the group. Forced at gunpoint, the participants must either hurt themselves or others, and while the challenges get a bit repetitive as the same one goes around the table, the choices the characters make is where the intrigue lies.

Though the ending is abrupt as all get out, the trip there is a decent one full of nice bits of acting, Jeffrey Combs chewing the scenery as the host, and some interesting moral conundrums. WOULD YOU RATHER? surprised me, and though there are whiffs of torture porn, the moral challenges make it an interesting trip.
And finally…here’s a quirky little scare from the director of NAILBITER, Patrick Rea, teaching us: if your copy machine tells you something…you’d better listen. Enjoy!
Copy from Patrick Rea on Vimeo.
See ya next week, folks!




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