Greetings, all. Ambush Bug here with another AICN HORROR: ZOMBIES & SHARKS column. This week we have another load of new scares for you to enjoy, plus some frights of yesteryear.
But before we do that…there’s this!
I DIDN’T COME HERE TO DIE is coming to select theaters in October via Tugg. I plan on reviewing this outstandingly awesome flick in the coming weeks and believe me, it is definitely Tugg-worthy. Here’s the official synopsis: the film tells the story of six young volunteers working on a humanitarian project in the woods where horrific accidents, rash decisions and the unpredictability of human nature leads them all to the same disturbing conclusion: that volunteer work can be a killer.
Tugg the film to a theater near you by clicking on this link!

I’ll be covering this further on AICN HORROR closer to the release date, but I just wanted to give you all a heads up on it!
If you enjoyed the Don Glut article we ran a few weeks ago, here’s parts two and three of that article posted by William Wilson. It’s not exactly horror, but this continues the story Wilson began a while back. Part 2 and Part 3!
Another film I gave an advance review to, GARDEN OF HEDON (reviewed here) will be playing at the Terror Film Festival in Philadelphia on October 20th. You can find more info on this very cool noir-laden horror film and the other films playing there by clicking here.
That was a lotta news. Now, on with the reviews!
(Click title to go directly to the feature)
HATCHET FOR THE HONEYMOON (1970)
THE HEARSE (1980)/BLOOD OF DRACULA (1969)
BUCKS COUNTY MASSACRE (2010)
AFTER THE DAWN (2012)
FDR: AMERICAN BADASS! (2012)
THE TALL MAN (2012)
And finally…Spoonfeedas with ATTACK OF THE HADEDAS!

HATCHET FOR THE HONEYMOON (1970)
aka BLOOD BRIDES and AN AXE FOR THE HONEYMOONDirected by Mario Bava
Written by Santiago Cano
Starring Stephen Forsyth, Laura Betti, Dagmar Lassander, Jesus Puente
Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug
Bava’s BAY OF BLOOD is one of my favorite films, mainly because of how influential it was to the FRIDAY THE 13TH series. It’s funny watching some of Bava’s films and realizing how much modern filmmakers “borrow” from this Italian horror maestro. I hadn’t seen HATCHET FOR THE HONEYMOON before watching this re-release by Redemption/Kino Lorber (which released three Bava greats—BLACK SUNDAY, which I reviewed last week, and LISA & THE DEVIL, which will be reviewed next week), but after doing so I can name a number of films it reminded me of, while all the while maintaining a fresh and exciting feel to it.


Though relatively bloodless, Bava’s horror here leans more psychological as we see an in control John begin to lose it. The closer he gets to uncovering the dark spots in his memory, the less in control he is. As his dead wife begins appearing all over the place, I began to wonder if this was an actual ghost or if it was indeed all in John’s mind. But from the get-go, John tells us he is a paranoid, so right off the bat, Bava lets us know that what we are seeing may not be completely accurate.

With lush and extravagant music, some fantastic set pieces filled with mannequins dressed in bridal gowns, a talking handbag full of ashes and a shiny, glistening meat cleaver on a plate, HATCHET FOR THE HONEYMOON is definitely going to please those with an eye for classic, yet devious Italian horror.

Double Feature: THE HEARSE/BLOOD OF DRACULA’S CASTLE
THE HEARSE (1980)Directed by George Bowers
Written by William Bleich & Mark Tenser
Starring Trish Van Devere, Joseph Cotton, David Gautreaux, Donald Hotton, Med Flory, Donald Petrie, Christopher McDonald, Perry Lang, Fred Franklyn, Olive Dunbar, Al Hansen
BLOOD OF DRACULA’S CASTLE (1969)
aka CASTLE OF DRACULA, DRACULA’S CASTLE
Directed by Al Adamson & Jean Hewitt
Written by Rex Carlton
Starring John Carradine, Paula Raymond, Alexander D'Arcy, Robert Dix, Gene Otis Shayne, Jennifer Bishop, Ray Young
Find out more about these films here!
Retro-reviewed by Ambush Bug
I’m not exactly sure why these two films were paired up in this double feature disk. Both are about people inheriting homes that aren’t what they seem, but beyond that they couldn’t be more dissimilar. But by watching both films, you get a nice variety of horrors, genuine and hokey, to enjoy.

Trish Van Devere heads an all star cast as Judy, the newcomer to a small town who is more than unwelcome once they find out she’s moving into that old creepy house. As usual, she is oblivious to obvious signs of haunting and pays no mind to seeing her dead aunt in the mirror and out of the window. Slamming doors…must be the wind. And she seems to only find it peculiar at first to see a hearse driving by with more frequency. At the same time a suave stranger shows up who ends up seducing her, but Judy pays no mind to the fact that she reads that the same thing happens to her aunt as she reads her diary. Any sane person would leave the house and most likely be leery of strangers, but not Judy. Van Devere was much better in the highly superior film THE CHANGELING. It’s interesting to see the cast pop in and out of the scene with the guy from PORKEY’S showing up as well as familiar faces of Joseph Cotton and especially a young Shooter McGavin himself, Christopher McDonald. But this is Van Devere’s show as the quivering woman in peril.

There is a nice ethereal feel to the dream and haunting sequences to this film. The director of this film also had the teen romp MY TUDOR to his credit list, so scares didn’t seem to be this guy’s forte. Seeing younger versions of Christopher McDonald was fun, but though this film was high on mood, THE HEARSE was pretty low on scares. I prefer the much more campy, but all the more fun, THE CAR, to this one.

The story is sluggish at times, with much camera time dedicated to scenes set to music as a young couple take photos at Sea World, then receive a letter to let them know that they have inherited a castle. Upon arriving, they find that it is occupied by a creepy couple played by Alexander D'Arcy (who many will recognize from HOW TO MARRY A MILLIONAIRE as one of Marilyn Monroe’s boyfriends) and THE BEAST FROM 20,000 FATHOMS’ Paula Raymond who sleep all day, a creepy butler named George (John Carradine), and a hulking man-monster named Mango!
Yeah, that’s right…MANGO!!!

Dix is in a completely different movie entirely. His is filled with gory death, impulsive killing, and lots of running away from hunters in rivers. His rampage is the highlight of the film as even without the hairy mask, he seems to be a complete psychopath.
With the wooden acting, hokey scares, and goofy dialog, I would not recommend this film if not for Dix’s werewolf portrayal. Any scene with the actor is gold as he struggles between being a howling monster and a hairless homicidal maniac. Check out BLOOD OF DRACULA’S CASTLE simply for his scenes alone.

BUCKS COUNTY MASSACRE (2010)
Directed by Jason ShermanWritten by Jason Sherman, Dan Kellmer, Jimm Scannell, Jason Sherman
Starring Brian Affleck, Megan Beck, Nikki Bell, Leighann Brokaw, Chris Christian, Adam Chylinski, Barrie Creedon, Brandon Ebron, Michael Galliano, Brittany Geiger, Lee Grimanis, Lee Grimanis, Tereza Hakobyan, Jason Gruber, Alexander Adrock
Find out more about this film here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
This film had me for a while. Though I know by now that any film can claim to be actual footage and that everything you are seeing is real evidence, I suspended my disbelief for the sake of the film in hopes of it living up to the ominous set up it types out for all to read in the opening seconds. Basically, there was a birthday party with a lot of guests. Late in the night a 911 call was made to report a missing person. The next morning when the police followed up, they found a gory crime scene. The premise is vague enough to suggest anything and I eagerly anticipated, hoping to be shocked as I found out what happened.

I won’t reveal what exactly it is that slaughters the rest of the partygoers, but while I will say I admire the fact that the appearance of the thing/things is pretty random and helps the viewer empathize with the surprise and shock the partygoers have upon the thing/things’ arrival, when the thing/things do arrive, the film devolves into every found footage film you’ve ever seen with almost completely blurred shots of motion, action drowned out by too much dark, and a whole lot of screaming. There is no reason to keep the camera rolling and the film ends so abruptly, you don’t know who was killed when or where.


AFTER THE DAWN (2012)
Directed by Mitchel A. JonesWritten by Nicole Kruex & Mitchel A. Jones
Starring Nicole Kruex, Tommy Propson, Shane McCaffrey, Aaron Courteau
Find out more about this film here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Another zombie film that isn’t really about zombies. In fact, the undead show up in only a few key scenes. But what sets AFTER THE DAWN apart from the rest is a heartfelt performance from its lead and some nice mood set by the director.


More reminiscent of THE ROAD than DAWN OF THE DEAD, director Mitchel A. Jones is very conservative when it comes to doling out the zombie mayhem. When the zombies do appear, they are pretty menacing, drooling and grumbling monstrosities of the 28 DAYS LATER variety. The scarcity of their appearances actually make them more frightening when they do show.
As I said above, apart from Kreux, the other actors just don’t have the chops to carry the weight and emotion the script requires. But some effective scenes of zombie menace and the central focus on its gorgeous star makes this zombie film more watchable than most.

FDR: AMERICAN BADASS! (2012)
Directed by Garrett BrawithWritten by Ross Patterson
Starring Barry Bostwick, Lin Shaye, Bruce McGill, Ray Wise Find out more about this film here and on Facebook here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
Abraham Lincoln apparently wasn’t the only president to tangle with the unknown. Oh no. Seems the most important job in America has always had monster fighting as one of their responsibilities. Just as the 60’s BATMAN television series compliments Nolan’s THE DARK KNIGHT as its goofy inbred cousin one can’t help but love, FDR: AMERICAN BADASS! does the same for ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER.

On a routine hunting trip with his friends, a pre-Presidential FDR happens upon a werewolf. Adding a bit of their own twist to the lycan mythology, it’s a little known fact that a werewolf bite causes “the polio”. While crippling his body, the werewolf bite motivates FDR to seek the highest responsibility in the country. But as FDR ascends to the White House, evil forces are plotting as Werewolf Hitler, Werewolf Mussolini, and Werewolf Hirohito three-way call one another to spread the werewolf curse across the globe. Of course, FDR is not going to take this sitting down…I mean, he’s not going to stand for this…I mean…dammit. He decides to take the fight to the werewolves and win WWII.

The film is filled with other actors who give it their all, from Lin Shaye (THERE’SOEMTHING ABOUT MARY) whose portrayal of Eleanor Roosevelt is hilariously tragic as she is disgusted by FDR’s tiny little polio legs to Bruce McGill’s performance as Louis, FDR’s earnest right hand man. Ray Wise plays Douglas Macarthur, while Ross Petterson gives an inspired comedic performance as the awkward and dense Cleavon Buford (Jimmy Carter’s uncle). Perhaps the most inspired casting is Kevin Sorbo as Abe Lincoln, who FDR has an otherworldly conversation with while high. And the trio of character actors playing Hitler (Jesse Merlin), Mussolini (Paul Ben-Victor), and Hirohito (Jameson Yang) provide quite a bit of laughs as well.

The film is most like the first AIRPLANE! film mixed with a little of TEAM AMERICA WORLD POLICE, so if you loved those films, you’re the right candidate to get in line for this one. Go in expecting a raunchy and goofy time, and you’re definitely going to get it from FDR: AMERICAN BADASS!

THE TALL MAN (2012)
Directed by Pascal LaugierWritten by Pascal Laugier
Starring Jessica Biel, Jodelle Ferland, Stephen McHattie, Jakob Davies, William B. Davis, Samantha Ferris, Katherine Ramdeen
Find out more about this film here!
Reviewed by Ambush Bug
I think a lot of people in the world today don’t like it when they don’t know what’s going on when it comes to film. When a director gets the better of a viewer and is successfully able to pull the wool over the eyes of them, more often than not, I think the most common reaction is that of anger and frustration. Shortly thereafter, the words “this sucks!” bellows out from that person’s lips, mostly because if they discredit the film, then they can’t admit that it got the better of them. I go to films because I want so desperately to see things I have never seen before. When a film comes along and I can honestly say while watching it that I have absolutely no idea how it’s going to end up…man, there is no better feeling in the world for me than that feeling. This feeling is so cherished for me mostly because I’ve seen so many films (particularly horror films) in which I can call the story beat for beat, that when a horror film comes along and truly challenges my expectations, I instantly fall in love with it. THE TALL MAN is such a film.

On top of that, Pascal is playing with one of cinema’s taboo subjects--that is, the importance of family. Much of horror is about returning to the status quo. The monster is ultimately defeated. The serial killer is destroyed. Whatever beast or baddie has come in and mussed up the ant hill is gone and the dust settles, giving the audience a sense that despite the horrific events, things are going to be ok. The TALL MAN is not that movie. While family has always been a constant, rock solid concept in film, here it challenges that notion. Without getting too far into spoiler territory (a previous review here on AICN did that, if you’re looking for spoilers), Laugier suggests that maybe being with one’s family isn’t the best case scenario and again, that is going to be a tough pill for some to swallow.
THE TALL MAN is about an urban legend made real. The children of a poor mining town are going missing without a trace. Police are baffled. Townsfolk are scared. And the local vet Julia (Jessica Biel) seems to be the only strong person left among them, as shown in the opening scene as she is the only person qualified in the town to oversee a young girl giving birth in secret. Fearing scrutiny from the townsfolk and possibly another abduction by the Tall Man (which the more superstitious of the townies have dubbed the abductor), Julia agrees to keep the info about the baby to herself. Soon, Julia returns to her own home to visit with her own child. The two share a loving relationship as seen through some endearing moments of play between Biel and the young actor David (played by DIARY OF A WIMPY KID’s Jakob Davies). But when the lights go out, Julia is awakened by a crash in the night and encounters the Tall Man in her house with David in tow about to disappear into the night.

Jessica Biel with her performance in this film has leapt from just another beautiful actress to one with definite balls after her brave portrayal of Julia in this film. Not only is she put through hell physically in this film, but her arc is complex and shatters all expectations one might have of her going in. Additional strong performances are offered up by PONTYPOOL’s Stephen McHattie, X-FILES Smoking Man William B. Davis, and SILENT HILL’s little girl Jodelle Ferdland. In a film which requires so many emotions being shredded and toyed with, the whole cast does a fantastic job at conveying them.
As with MARTYRS before it, which was without a doubt one of the most shocking films in the last twenty years, THE TALL MAN opens with an extremely close viewpoint then gradually throughout the film pulls back revealing a much bigger world than what one first expects. Just as MARTYRS evolved before your eyes from a film about madness and inner demons to one of existential torture and transcending beyond what the sane mind can truly withstand, THE TALL MAN morphs and evolves as the running time speeds by. Though I won’t reveal the twists and turns here, I will say that the multiple times the story pulled the rug from under me got me big time. I’m not afraid to admit this film got the better of me and I love it for doing so. If you’re the type of person who gets pissed at being surprised, I know right now that THE TALL MAN just won’t be for you. But if you go to a film to be shocked, to be manipulated, to be surprised, THE TALL MAN delivers all of that in spades.
And finally…here’s a fun video from the South African band the Spoonfeedas. Check out this homage to giant monster movies in ATTACK OF THE HADEDAS!!!
See ya next week, folks!




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