28 DAYS review

I walked into the Highland 10 theater here in Austin on Monday night begrudgingly. I hadn’t slept in about 36 hours. Since 11am that morning, I had been on the set of Robert Rodriguez’s SPY KIDS watching Danny Trejo... well be the bad ass that he is.

It involved standing on a hot street a lot... and though I had a lot of fun (to be detailed later) I was beat by the time I entered the theater.

There are limits.... even to Headgeek, and I was pressing them. Father Geek and Quint insisted that we go see 28 DAYS.

28 DAYS?

What the fuck for? First off it’s PG-13... so right off the bat you know this isn’t going to have any gratuitous Sandra Bullock nudity. (You have to understand... I had gone 36 hours with no sleep... my mind was nearing neanderthal levels of intelligence!) Sure... Viggo Mortensen was in it... but it’s not likely that he’ll pick up a friggin broken sword and waylay into some awesome looking orcs.

So... Why on earth should I go?

“Harry, they’ve been advertising on your site, you owe it to your readers to tell them it’s the piece of shit that you think it is,” quoted Father Geek.

Great... Fucking duty. Duty was going to make me sit through a friggin weepy Sandra Bullock Alcohol rehibilitation feature.

Sigh. I was thirsty, so I went up and bought myself a Diet Pepsi, is there really a more rank soda on the market? We head in, take our seats. The people throwing the screening... some Radio station... hand Father Geek, Quint and I a champagne bottle filled with candy.

While waiting for the film to start, I called Moriarty on my Dick Tracy and tell him about the champagne bottle and the SPY KIDS set. The dear Professor sounded aghast at the idea of handing out champagne bottles filled with candy at a screening of a film about drug and alcohol rehibilitation. His parallel was, “Wouldn’t that be like handing out little plastic ovens with chocolate at SCHINDLER’S LIST?”

My God, he’s going to hell for that... but he did have a point. Well, I sat there... nearly dozing, waiting for this piece of shit to get started.

I’ll be damned. In reality this is a pretty damn charming movie. Perhaps it is because I was near hallucinatingly tired, but more likely it is because I saw a film (which will go unmentioned) during SXSW that was basically the exact same plot, but was a complete piece of shit and this was near brilliant by comparison.

You see... the drug and alcohol treatment movie is often times the ‘After School Movie of the Week’ or possibly that Tuesday Night Film on the Network of your choice. Or it is that movie that you simply steer way clear of.

This film, quite honestly because of the deft direction of Betty Thomas... managed to steer clear of all those regular potholes and trite gutterballs.

The film does not feel preachy because Betty carefully dodges the pitfalls. Usually in this genre of film, we end up, like the characters.... listening to long loooong loooooooooooong monologues about how ______ is bad. It is real BAD. And pretty soon the film is trapped in what I call the broken record refrain.

But the fact is that we know _____ is bad. What has to happen is the character on screen has to see this, not me. We need to watch the character go from denying the problem, refusing the treatment, having that moment of clarity, that moment of self betrayal... all the way through till we get the... wait for it... Successful release of the reformed born again human being.

We know the formula. That is how the arc of this type of film HAS to go to work. But we know that, so if a filmmaker just takes us on that path and makes it all about curling up in a fetal position vomiting on oneself in the shower stall floor... Well... I’m sorry, but I’ll just walk out the theater and sneak into READY TO RUMBLE to oogle Rose McGowan’s talents.

BUT... thankfully, Betty Thomas added the flavor of human comedy to the mixture. It’s not this deep dark exploration of addiction. Instead it shows how ridiculous these addictions are, how childlike the treatments are... She throws us a fun group of characters that all have problems.... ranging from sex addicts to heroin addicts to alcohol and cokeheads.

And in the center of it all, there’s good ol Sandra Bullock. You know, she’s just radiant sometimes. Here... when she’s in her alcoholic maelstorm of activity... she is a human magnet. She’s sexy, likable, loose and available. Her body language is perfect as a drunk. Not overly exaggerated like most people play it. Sandra has either a great memory for what it’s like to be drunk... or is an astute study of drunks, because she nailed it.

My mother was a bigtime Alcoholic. When they found her body after the fire, her blood alcohol level was at .5, when she died... she was in an alcoholic coma. But I still remember the way she’d stumble... the way she would slide her hips weird while standing... that blank unfocused stare with the ever moving jaw and gutteral sounds. The cruel things she’d say, that were wonderfully funny to her, but the next day’s realization would just force the bottle back to her mouth.

I don’t think alcoholism is particularly funny. It’s not something to aspire to. But you also don’t combat it by being preachy. This film has the right tact. It has the right mix. The various characters are fun. The in film Soap Opera is downright hysterical. And ultimately the movie is quite heartwarming.

My only complaints about the film is that the ending is rather arbitrary and from out of left field. Didn’t really care for it. And the bizarre German Gay Alcoholic Sex Addict.... he’s just a bit... too.... too... whatever. I kept thinking he was straight out of a Saturday Night Live sketch... and a bad one at that, but... admittedly the audience really loved him. Maybe it was just me.

Now I’m off to review WHERE THE MONEY IS, the film I saw tonight. Enjoy...