Old Tom Joad has been busy lately digging thru a pile of scripts we needed read over here at Geek World Headquarters. Here's the 1st of several he promises Father Geek he'll review for us here on the site in the next few days...
BOOKS OF BLOOD script review by Tom Joad
What has happened to the MODERN HORROR FILM?
Why does every horror movie have to be soooo BAD? Aside from the awfully infrequent scares of a BLAIR WITCH or even a SIXTH SENSE for those who consider it to be a true "horror" film, the market is void of well-made, quality, kick-ass bloody HORROR.
I consider myself to be the ultimate genre fan, starting back in junior high I began my steady diet of horror, and I did not discriminate. I wanted it all and I found it: I saw every gorehound, stalk and slash, mad doctor, demonic possession, pseudo-snuff, cannibal gut-muncher I could get my hands on. and I developed a deep love for all things red and wet.
Sure, 80% of pretty much everything out in the market blows goats. But there is still a lot to love in that 80 percentile: the goofy dialogue, convenient plot twists, & terrible character decisions are all things loved and looked forward to by millions, not to mention the thick arterial sprays many of us like as our main course of horror. With horror flix (most of the time) you pretty much know what you're gonna get, and you give your brain a break once you enter the theatre or hit play on your VCR.
Personally, I believe that the most consistent way to tell horror is in short story, or anthology form. Consistent in the sense that for thirty minutes, it is easier to keep our attention, to keep us scared, for the filmmakers to keep their edge. You've got to admit there are many features that turn out mediocre, yet would kick ass if whittled down to a thirty minute tale!
The CREEPSHOW films rank high on my list of fun horror flix, as does TWO EVIL EYES, BODY BAGS, the TALES FROM THE CRYPT series, and many, many others. My love of horror on the screen eventually bled over into my reading material as I devoured every King, Barker, Koontz, Campbell book I could find. Not surprisingly, I found some of the best reading in short story form. Clive Barker's BOOKS OF BLOOD have been among by favorites for complete originality and fantastical storytelling, as well as blatant disregard for sugar-coating anything he covered. He regularly shocked me and made me laugh. Needless to say, I was high with anxiety when Harry handed me this script. My drooling began. An hour and a half later, I held the just-read, spit-soaked manuscript in my hands. with an evil grin plastered across my face & a three foot long stream of saliva stretching toward the ground from my frozen smile, I began to read it again. And again.
Three reads later and I'm more stoked than ever. This baby delivers! Sure sure, yeah, yeah - this'll get cut and that'll get toned down. be damned! On the written page, this one provides the goods missing from many a Hollywood release. Three short stories: HUMAN REMAINS, PIG BLOOD BLUES & DREAD, have all been adapted into a feature length script by Keith Clark, Bill Condon, Christopher Landon & Jack Morrissey. These are good men who know where they tread.
The first, HUMAN REMAINS, concerns a young man, GAVIN PARKER, a gorgeous midnight cowboy who pays his rent by satisfying many a woman. or man. GAVIN is obsessed with his own beauty, his immaculate face, his chiseled abs, his life is one big show put on for any and all potential customers. One customer has a secret in store for GAVIN that is more incredible, flattering and fatal than anything he ever imagined.
The second, DREAD, is my personal favorite. I loved this story back in the eighties when I first read it and it remains the one I've reread the most often. We're all familiar with the gnawing inside us when we're faced with something we either don't want to do or are slightly apprehensive about. Whether it's getting up in the morning for the three thousandth time for that job you're sick of, or when you're faced with one of those unmentionable situations when you just wish you could become invisible to avoid it altogether. It is this very moment of dread, this very moment of pain - that we're most open to change, that we're vulnerable. In this tale, a university teaching assistant, QUAID, has such an interest in the human condition. More specifically: dread. QUAID befriends a couple of students in efforts to further his research and experiments on the subject. they just don't know it yet.
Embarking on one of the most unorthodox experiments ever, we're allowed a little light into QUAID'S twisted mind as his thoughts and actions darken everything and everyone around him. Very twisted, very fun.
Lastly, we're introduced to NEIL REDMAN, a man looking for a change, has accepted a job as a teacher at a school for boys in East L.A. The job appears normal at first and then descends gradually into madness, I promise you won't have any idea where this one goes.
All three stories are tied together, given reason and motivated by a fourth story which has been added, fully explaining a the back story of the BOOKS OF BLOOD that is as compelling as it is original, and very satisfying. Reading this has been a pleasure. I do apologize for such a short review, but I hate spoilers, and don't want to ruin anything for anybody!
Believe me, if you like horror films with attitude that make you jump, fill you with terror, keep you twisting on the edge of your seat AND spit blood in your face, you will NOT BE DISAPPOINTED. Everything that needs to be is here.
Everybody is a book of blood; wherever we're opened, we're red.
Tom Joad signing out.
