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Details of the upcoming BRUCE WAYNE TV series!

So, the world moves along... everything is contingent, and there is chaos. Here and there, a blurb goes about, it speaks... there's a new series in the works called "Bruce Wayne" - or is it "They Call Me Bruce"? (Kidding, you damn paranoid talkbackers!) Nobody else had any details, so I figured I would go into a trance-state, and commune with... Huitzilopochtli. Taking a bit more than the prescribed dosage, I found myself in contact with the dreaded left-handed warrior, and a hoary visage of a... a person who knows. An intern? A copy clerk? A trapped air-conditioner duct cleaner? Perhaps even "the demon who makes trophies of men."

"Huitzilopochtli! I beseech you! I must have speaks with the muddled form of WBtv!"

After running outside to grab a neighbor for a quick blood-sacrifice, with images of hummingbirds flittering about, my request was granted. Of course, I then passed out, in a wild fit of tears and joy. Waking up, I cleaned the blood off of my mouth and hands, and here's what I remember. To be sure, this is truth of the universe, and my neighbor was not sacrificed in vain.

As you know it has been a dark time for comic book characters in Hollywood. Many of us toiling under the yoke of insanity have prayed to the gods for deliverance, or at least some small ray of hope. It may have arrived, thanks to the very finest of screenwriters, Tim McCanlies, who wrote the most excellent screenplay for "The Iron Giant," and wrote and directed last year's wonderful little "Dancer, TX Pop. 81" (rent it), is the man behind "Bruce." In other words, if there are any problems with the series, they won't be coming from the script. (FYI, apparently McCanlies loves "Buffy the Vampire Slayer," and is a big Frank Miller fan; "Bruce" backtracks from "Year One.") The production company? Tollin-Robbins, aka Marquee/Tollin-Robbins, who have produced TONS of TV, from HBO's "Arli$$" to one of my favorites, "Kenan and Kel" on Nickelodeon. They also produced "Varsity Blues", which incidentally was also directed by Brian Robbins. Where's it at right now? WBtv is thrilled, yea, THRILLED with the pilot script, and the muckety-mucks are mulling a network location for the show. Probably either the WB or Fox.


Bruce, well, Bruce is having problems. You all know the history already, the guy's parents were SHOT right in front of him...he feels guilty about it, on the other hand, Bruce has always had a lot of things...come too easy. The fellow...without any challenges, well, what do you do with your day when you...don't need to do anything, and you're chronically depressed? Bruce is abroad, up to no good, and a certain butler who has always been much more than a butler intends an end to a life without direction for him. He's coming a Gotham with...problems, 18 years old, returning for the first time since the death of his parents. Persons of questionable character running his family's company, police corruption rampant, and all of the fun that comes along with living in a city that's going to hell.

A good fun lot of the usual suspects is around, everyone moving through their lives on their way to their dreams and nightmares. A certain police detective by the name of Gordon might just be the only good cop around. Oh, and there are also a lot of women in Bruce's life. It's all about how everyone got to be who they got to be...but mostly, of course, how the hell does a rich kid get to the point where he dresses up like a bat and spends his time running around town whipping ass on evil? We all, every last one of us, ends up where life takes us. We become, in the end, what we MUST become, what it is MOST NATURAL to become. In some people's lives, that means dressing up like a bat. Bruce has to go from not giving a damn, to giving more of a damn than ANYONE else. In other words, when this mofo hits the air, AND IT WILL (Fall, 2000), it's going to be a keeper. This is all especially nice in light of what appears to be an upcoming season of anally-raped comic book legends on the silver screen. We will have a refuge on our beloved glowing wacky-boxes. VIVA COAXIAL!

Did the demon say anything else? The demon had to run, lest a WB exec spy it playing with the hotmail, but MORE WILL COME!!! After all, my neighbor only had so much blood to spill, I must find another...PRAISE HUITZILOPOCHTLI! YEA, PRAISE HIM, YOU FILTHY WORMS!!!

Hasta Mas Sangre,

El Cosmico

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