And The Next Stop On Our Descent Into Hell Will Be: BARBIE: THE MOVIE!!

Merrick here...
Universal has allied with Mattel to bring us a live-action BARBIE movie.

The studio has made a deal with Mattel to build a live action film around its signature toy line.

In regards to producer Laurence Mark:

Mark said he felt fortunate to get the job and said there is no shortage of plot possibilities, since Barbie has held more than 120 jobs over the years.

All per THIS write-up in Variety, which goes on to discuss the canvassing of writers for the project. As long as the movie empowers women, marginalizes men, deals with a hairstyling crisis every fifteen minutes, and is really fucking pink? It'll be awesome.