Word to the “Stargate Universe” showrunners: THIS is how you put on a funny panel, you assholes!
My live Twitter report from the “Lost” panel Saturday morning, ultragonzo-style with most typos and horrible punctuation fully intact:
In my first real line of the con, if you don't count Starbucks.
Got in line for 11am LOST panel at 10am Looooooooooong fucking line. At least itls overcast so the geekstink does not yet overwhelm.
now in LOST
Hilarious youtube parodies being shown, including an OC takeoff and a jack/sawyer brokeback
Cuse pulls the final page of the series finale out of his ankle holster!
Lindelof: there could be many characters in season six we haven't seen since the first season.
Gaptoothed guy from Human Giant hilarous pretending to have waited in line six months to give darlton velvet painting i'll describe later
POST-PANEL UPDATE: It was a mammoth painting of Cuse and Lindelof posing with their arms around a polar bear.
daniel will be back
now playing hilarious macgruberish title sequence
POST-PANEL UPDATE: If this is not on the DVD I will be most sad.
Now a commercial with hurley as owner of Mr. Cluck.
America’s most wanted guy featuring story on Katherine Austen
This panel already worth the hour in line
Jorge’s in question line claiming darlton not returning his calls
The last time I trusted you guys you said niki and paulo would be awesome, says Jorge.
Michael emerson ushers jorge away from mike for asking too manny questions
Emerson to Garcia: Oh, I forgot about the huge gap between you and the character you play.
Now footage of emerson auditioning for hurley! Doing great impression of garcia
Look for the alpert flashback next season
Elizabeth mitchell confirmed for final season
POST-PANEL UPDATE: Mitchell will also be in “V” just as Dominic Monaghan will also be in “FlashForward,” all ABC shows.
Bob Stencil, superfan, feigns nosebleed during his question
He steadies himself with his "constant": a Dharma Beer
Clip: “Richard Alpert's not immortal, you are,” says Carbonell to mirror while applying eyeliner.
POST-PANEL UPDATE: Nestor Carbonnell doesn’t really use eyeliner, he just has naturally awesome lashes.
Source of swan station groceries will be addressed this season
Not a lot of dharma stuff in the final season
Josh halloway tasers lindelof (thinking he's jj abrams) then makes lurch/frankenstein jokes at cuse's expense
Emerson reads ' final page,' which turns out to be the last page of HEROES
POST-PANEL UPDATE: Things not looking good for Peter Petrelli!
Now Oscar-style tribute to the lost dead. BIG cheers for Eko!
POST-PANEL UPDATE: Unlike the Oscars, the “Lost” panel gave us footage of everybody actual (usually super-violent) demise.
Monahan just took the stage
End
Footage:
Fakery: