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Presenting AICN's First Review Of DRAGONBALL...

Beaks here...

Ever since they announced the bargain-basement casting of James Marsters and Emmy Rossum, I've been getting a strong WING COMMANDER vibe from James Wong's DRAGONBALL. Turns out, it might be a little bit better than WING COMMANDER. Praise Jesus.
Hello to all of you, I am a huge fan of your site and constantly visit here but this will be my first time emailing you about something. I love geek movies because there is nothing better than a well made geek movie. Well after watching the 95-100 minutes (excluding credits) of the movie i say this movie was solid. Ya you heard that right. I simply love the anime but I was very very nervous about it being made by fox. After all the studio has been making nothing but shit lately. Another reason why I was worried about this movie is that the director is James Wong who made final destination 1 & 3 and The one starring Jet Li. What I watched had unfinished sfx and with no scoring done yet. Also... they will be adding one or two scenes which will be shot sometime end of october. Now let me list the positives of this movie 1) Action - I wasn't expecting the action scenes to be as awesome as they were. Simply put the best thing about this movie. The last action scene of Goku vs. Picollo are simply amazing and when picollo takes out his huge fucking ass sword with weird rectangle shape tablet attached it at the tip of sword and slamming it on goku was fucking awesome. Lot of blowing shit up, super cool flying scenes, awesome ki blasts. This fight scene was around 13-15 minutes long. There are other small action scenes that are fun and entertaining with slo mo but nowhere as good as the picollo vs. goku scene. 2) James Marsters as Picollo was awesome. He was perfect as picollo. Very mean and a villain that makes you say fuck ya kick all their asses. Oh and Picollo transforms into a light greenish color picollo towards the end of the movie. 3) Justin Chatwin as Goku. This guy surprised me a lot. I really didn't like him when they casted him as goku but he did a damn good job in the acting department and he nailed the KAMEHAMEHA line. 4) Oozaru - the giant monkey is in the movie. Goku turns into a 8-9 feet tall giant baboon when he looks at the moon. It was awesome looking though a bit CGI. Maybe they will fix it later. 5) Emmy Rossum as Bulma- She was really really good in this role. I liked how she never acted like a wimpy girl and eventhough she knows she can't win against the evil forces yet she kicks ass. A strong female role I will say. 6) Fullum Assasins - I thought adding these monsters were bad idea but they were pretty damn cool and there was an enitre scene where Goku and his friends fight these monsters and that fight scene was pretty damn good. 7) Joon Park as Yamcha was pretty cool. His acting was spot on like the character and they showed some cool fighting techniques of his. The fight scene between him and goku was good. Negatives 1) Story - Dragonball fans will be dissapointed with some of the changes they have made with stories and characters etc. Krillin isn't in the movie, Tien isn't in the movie too. High school setting for the first 22-23 minutes was so not needed but ah well typical hollywood garbage of adding bullshit like that. 2) Jamie Chung as Chi Chi - Ya this was another casting i didn't like and my worst fears came true. Her acting is as bad as Jessica Alba's in F4 movies but thankfully her screentime isn't that big. I really wished they could have tried harded to find someone else. I hope for sequel she can improve if there is one of course. 3) Chow Yun Fat as Master Roshi - I was dissapointed with this. I wanted the fucking perverted roshi who fucking grabs breasts and asses like in the anime but alas all of that is fucking gone. Also he acted like Mr. Kesuke Miyagi. You know what I mean. The lines he spoke were fine but I felt he was uncomfortable in the movie. Very dissapointed. 4) Shenron the dragon - Ah another huge dissapointment. This is like sentinel in X3 all over again. FUCK FUCK FUCK you fox. So ya they get all the dragonballs and the dragon appears but the dragon is hiding behind fucking clouds and you only see his shadow. The voice of the dragon was provided by none other than Christopher Sabat who provided the voice for the dragon in the american version of the anime. When the dragon spoke it was chilling but damnit it was hiding behind clouds. One can hope they will fix this but chances of that are very slim. 5) Eriko Tamura as Mai was underused character and frankly speaking if that is what their intention was to underuse her then they might as well have not added this character and just added more picollo. Her moments were cool and she basically was there to show her nice boobies but ya she was kinda wasted. Overall, I would give the movie a 6.5/10 simply because i was expecting disaster but it turned out better. The positives I mentioned coupled with some cool funny goku moments like eating a massive turkey etc. were hilarious. If only Master Roshi was perverted and Shenron was visible I would have given this 9 but ah well they messed up there. Hopefully they will fix shenron as they still have 5 months to movie's release but if not then well fuck you to fox and james wong. But in all seriousness I am glad it aint the disaster I thought it would be. Hopefully you guys will post this. Thank You. Call me DON

Hard to believe that Chow Yun-Fat could be perceived as a "negative" in dreck like this. But, hey, light-greenish Picollo!

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