I had a happy/downer day this Father’s Day. Now some of you readers out there know that I treat a lot of the writing on this site, as though you are my best friend...
There’s a reason for that. When I’m writing it’s usually 3am. I’m alone. The phone doesn’t ring and it’s just me and my keyboard. I’m introspective and I’m talking to you.
In a way, it’s like a diary that I share with other people, and whether the response is hateful or happy... Well, in a way those arguments about me rage in me from day to day.
But tonight I’m going to discuss why I came home and put ROCKY 1-4 on my television tonight... This Father’s Day night. If it’s objective criticism... go elsewhere... This piece is me.
I awoke at 8:00 this morning, Dad and I had to pick up my sister and head to San Antonio to visit my grandparents.
I’m often told by people I know that they are jealous of the friendship I have with my father... But really... this began with my Gramps. He’s the strongest man I have, and will, ever (know) known.
Gramps taught me to take the words of the Scout Law seriously. He taught me to stand up for what I believe in, to speak my mind... And he taught me to never give up.
I’ve spent my entire life trying to live the life I’ve wanted, while at the same time earning the respect of my Gramps. I entered into Boy Scouts to better understand him. And once I was a member of that organization, I knew I had to reach Eagle. I remember during my parent’s divorce, I had to travel across the state just to earn the merit badges, I had to be a member of a troop over 5 hours from where I was living. I didn’t let anything stand in my way.
God I love my grandfather. And today it really settled in on me. He’s going to die sooner rather than later. And ya know... I’m not afraid of death, and really I don’t think he is either. But... the fear I see in him is what is going to happen to the woman he took as wife after he’s gone, my grandmother. With every breath he takes I see a man bravely facing what is coming, and his only fears lay with those he leaves behind. He doesn’t want to leave her side. And that... It’s that aspect of him that touches me.
He’s hooked up to all these hoses, has to fight a rapidy failing immune system... And it’s Granny he’s thinking of. And when he looks at me, he fills me with pride and a sense that I have so far to go to be half the man he is.
I’ve always thought of him as being invincible. The Energizer Bunny of men. He’s been paralyzed and told he’d never walk again. He walked. It was my memory of each of his steps I’ve seen in my life that inspired my legs to walk when I was paralyzed. He’s seen his own heart more than once. He’s died more than once and he’s come back. But this time, when he goes... I don’t imagine any miraculous comebacks... But I hope for them all the same.
So it was with those feeling that I came home and watched the ROCKY films (#5 doesn’t count).
I just bought ROCKY 1,2 and 4 on DVD (where’s 3) and so I began with 1.
ROCKY
I am one of those people that feel that ROCKY is a perfect film. In no way, in no fashion could it be any more perfect.
I put this film and this series on to see the story of a man who could beat the odds, who could protect and care for and love the woman he chose. I put this on to see a real life human being throw his arms up in triumph... even in defeat. A man who sets his own goals for success, even if it doesn’t mean ‘winning’ according to everyone’s standards.
He just wants to over-leap everyone’s expectations for who and what he appears to be on an exterior package level.
While re-watching ROCKY tonight, I said a little prayer for the Stallone in this film to return. This character isn’t some run of the mill hack performance. It’s brilliant. The look in his eyes, his body language, his voice, that accent. Over the coarse of the series he fell back a bit on self-parody, but here... In this film... This perfect movie, Stallone delivers a performance that statues should be erected for.
And then there is everybody else in this movie. Each and everyone of them a perfect character... Drawn not in broadstrokes, but in tiny brushstrokes paying attention to all the fine hairs of details.
Talia Shire’s Adrian. What I love is... when you first see her character you can’t see the attraction between her and Rocky. Not because one lives at a different class from the other. No, they both exist in the down and out area of the universe. However, the attraction is based out of Rocky not wanting or willing to be alone in life.
He’s failed as a boxer, as a student... He’s a two-bit thug bending arms for a 20 spot here and there. Sucking up to some loan shark that’d break his thumbs if he ever got out of line. And... he’s dumb. He has all the heart in the world, but... a B student he ain’t. But being lonely... he can change that.
It’s really funny to me... what people think or ask some times. I get asked a lot if being on Siskel & Ebert was my dream come true. Or they ask me if I have succeeded yet.
And in all honesty the answer is no. Because I don’t dream of those things. I dream of my Adrian. She needn’t be a Heather Graham or a Denise Richards... Because whoever she is... She’s far more glamorous to me than anyone else on the planet. And it’s that aspect of Rocky I love.
He just went the distance, he’s on top of his world... and all he wants is to have her there with him. THAT... That is what I dream of.
It’s funny, this theme is shared in THEY DIED WITH THEIR BOOTS ON, an old Errol Flynn/Olivia De Havilland flick I saw at the Union Theater last Tuesday. And it kills me.
Sharing a lifetime with someone is the most precious of jewels I covet and desire. And watching my grandparents today... they reenforced this belief a thousand fold.
Granny switching out his oxygen tanks, helping to cover him up.... Caring for him. And if positions were reversed... the result would be the same. Two halves of the same coin flipping through time together. It’s beautiful.
Being that I was in a particularly strange set of mind tonight, I saw the fights not as action scenes, but as a metaphor for any and all dangers that might possibly bar one from their pursuit of happiness.
ROCKY II
All the subtlety of the first film is gone, and instead you have merely the characters. And in this series... that’s enough. Of course watching Adrian in her coma... Rocky by her side, in the chapel every spare second. A million other things needing to be taken care of, but the dedication of spending all your thoughts and energies towards the loved one.... Well, it got me something fierce tonight.
One of the aspects I love of these films is Philadelphia. I’ve been there only once, and it was my Gramps that took me. I ran up them stairs... Drove through the area of town Rocky was from. And as I saw those buildings, that elevated train and those steps... I thought of every word my grandfather spoke to me that trip.
I don’t know if I’ll ever feel this way about this series of films on any other night of my life. But on this night... Everything was tying into my Gramps.
ROCKY III and IV...
Here... Here was my distraction. The point where my mind wandered from the troubles and trevails I have been pondering this day.
Instead of thinking about directions in life and placement in the scheme of things... I was able to just enjoy Clubber Lang and ThunderLips and Pauly and...
When Mickey dies... I had to leave the room tonight.
This may seem like a depressing downer sort of thing to write about, but quite the contrary... Tonight and today was a great Father’s Day. My grandfather shared in laughter at the misc. adventures I’ve gone on, he beamed in pride over my sister’s graduation. He shared stories that I’ll treasure.
And to top it all off, it motivated me to watch one of my favorite 4 film series around. (though the Weismuller TARZANs and Rathbone SHERLOCK HOLMES’ shine mighty brightly for me)
I’m such a lucky person to have such great people that I’ve shared life with thus far. And I love film’s ability to give me distance and perspective I need to reflect upon it all.
So, here I am.... A dawn on a new day edging nearer and nearer to it’s birth. My eyes getting heavier and I’m feeling better. Thanks for putting up with my little melodramatic swings I go on from time to time. Perhaps on some other day I might right a more cohesive piece on the Rocky films... But for now and on this evening this is what poured out of me.
But if you made it this far... Hug the nearest loved one you have... they’re precious.
