Midol Girl says THE GOLDEN COMPASS made her a 10 year old girl again!

After seeing The Golden Compass a couple of days ago I walked out grinning the kind of grin that could only be attributed to something far greater then special effects; mind blowing production design and a riveting adventure story. No, there was no oiled-up hunk rubbing my shoulders and feeding me popcorn kernel by kernel. And you can't count Quint offering to buy me a bag before the show or Harry (drooling over the Speed Racer trailer spectacle) as any substitute. Directed and adapted by Chris Weitz (nominated for best writing, adapted screenplay academy award in 2003 for About a Boy) and debuting Dakota Blue Richards as the lead Lyra, The Golden Compass is based on the Phillip Pullman novel. To be honest, I hadn’t read the book and walked into the theatre knowing little about the story. After seeing a Comic Con display of a few of the production props, wardrobe pieces and art department samples, I knew was in for a production design orgasm. I also watched the trailers a few times getting me giddy. I felt my little girl excitement for this type of fantasy adaptation. However, the movie previews left a bitter taste in my mouth when it came to the CG. I winced at the sight of the cartoony movements of the realistically designed side-kick animals or “Demons”. After the movie finished I felt that a few more hours of rendering lighting effects on the furry friends wouldn’t have hurt. A few Demons were created well enough that you forgot they were nothing but moving blobs of pixels; others didn’t keep that secret so well. But, her best friend’s little puppy daemon, even as cute as he was, was the worst. With so many other computer born animals flying, crawling and slithering in and out of the frame the hit-and-miss animation became distracting and took away from the lead animals that were really well done. The thing with this type of CG that irks me is that we are not watching them in their natural computer made environments. Poorly rendered digital characters are easier to forgive when the rest of their environment is also made of poorly rendered CG. Cough- Shrek, ahem. But by placing fake animals in live action settings requires the audience to have a large propensity to suspend their disbelief. I understand, from a technical stand-point, that the task of dropping CG into a previously shot film scene is hugely difficult in comparison to just animating everything from the get-go, but still it’s hard to see past the special effect’s jarring presence. It wouldn’t have been so bad if the animals moved like animals, because they looked like animals- but they looked like animals and moved like cartoons. That sort of thing works in a film with a more playful vibe, like Babe but The Golden Compass was a dark fanciful epic tale. This “not being one thing or another” and the blending of story-telling methods seemed to be the main downfall of The Golden Compass that transcended beyond the CG. The overall treatment of the subject matter made it hard to pinpoint for whom exactly the movie was made. It’s largely marketed at children and families but the slow pace and predominantly talking-head expository dialog won’t likely hold this young generation's short attention span. On the other hand, the dialog, as heavy as the subject matter was, wasn’t complex or intellectual enough for grown-ups. So, there was this kind-of wishy-washy feel to the tale. There were some scenes that were fairly graphic like this full-on violent polar bear battle (there for shock value?) that seemed to come out of nowhere. That had the movie geekoids around me laughing. It’s no secret I am a child of the 80's, as is evident by the nostalgic movie memorabilia I have around my apartment. Star Wars ships, TMNT action figures and a Cabbage Patch Kid sized Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man looming over my keyboard. I practically popped out a movie geek, As a baby, I’m sure if I was offered baby food made from mashed popcorn I would have opted for that instead of split pea. I hate split pea anything now but have regular hankerings for that over-priced buttery evil of all carbs in a bag. The trouble with being born a celluloid geekette isn’t the cellulite you incur from hours spent sitting and stuffing your face mindlessly, but the chip on your shoulder that grows larger every time you watch yet another amazing family adventure flick starring a courageous outlandishly imaginative little boy. As a little girl, I loved going to the silver screen. I loved almost every part of it. The part I didn't love was that I seldom saw myself being reflected back from the silver screen. Are we as family fantasy film lovers supposed to see the adventurous little boy-rascals fighting dragons and saving their friends as “the little boy” in all of us? If we were not, then we would sure be SOL wouldn’t we? The box office would be down a few numbers too, because despite 80’s and 90’s family adventure flicks most often starring my male counterparts, it wasn’t just the boys watching these flicks. Most of my girlfriends have the same type of nostalgia associated with The Goonies as any of the boys in school, despite the fact that the only two girl characters in this film were whiny little hanger-ons love-interest sidelines. We girls loved these movies just as deeply as the next guy. Why? Because we didn’t have much of a choice and the adventures that these little heroes had captured our imaginations far beyond any My Little Pony could. Does that mean that the void of adventure seeking little girls went unnoticed for us, or that it didn’t have any sort of long lasting impact? Not for me. Just because you love movies starring little boys doesn’t mean that you aren’t perturbed there are too few girls majestically riding an animal into war, fighting pirates, searching for treasure, or befriending robots. The time has come when a little girl should be able to go to a movie with her Mom, Dad and bratty brothers and go “Woh coooooOOOooool” from the heart. Bottom line is despite it’s CG shortfalls and atmosphere made for a 10 year old with the attention span of 20 year old, I was extraordinarily happy with the film. Maybe it’s because I watched it with the movie-loving eyes of a ten year old set in my 20-something year old body. Maybe it’s because seeing little Lyra rescue her best friend while staring down scary gypsies and asserting “What are you looking at?” or “Don’t ever call me a lady!” was nothing short of therapeutic for me. After years and years of studio neglect, lack of acknowledgement of my adventurous spirit and visual torment of having to sit and watch another little heroic boy have all the fun while the girls duck and waddle behind him whining, crying, acting pissy and pouting, Finally I say, finally. -Midol Girl Remember these childhood adventure classics? I do – they are my favorites! I don’t see a single girl story here though. Does this year’s The Golden Compass mean times are changing? I sure hope so. Luke Skywalker, Star Wars 1977 Jen - The Last of Gelflings, The Dark Crystal 1982 Bastian, The Never Ending Story 1984 Elliot, E.T. 1982 Pony Boy, The Outsiders 1983 Billy, The Gremlins 1985 Michael, The Peanut Butter Solution 1985 Marty McFly, Back to The Future 1985 Mikey, The Goonies 1986 Sean, Monster Squad 1987 The Grandson (Fred Savage), The Princess Bride 1987 Willow, Willow 1988 Luke Eveshin, The Witches 1990 Kevin, Home Alone 1990 Andy, Toy Story 1994 Hogarth, The Iron Giant 1999