Hey, everyone. Capone in Chicago here. If all goes according to plan, over he next few days, I'm going to bitch slap you with interview with three major players in the film THE TEN. In my estimation, they are the three most important people creatively, which is saying a lot considering the talent on display here. Until that time, here are my thoughts on this blessed event. Although various combinations of the former cast of "The State" have been working together in the years since that show left the MTV airwaves about 12 years ago, in just the last year, that seems to be happening more and more often, and I couldn't be more pleased. I believe all or nearly all of the cast appeared in RENO 911: MIAMI earlier this year, and now every last one of them shows up again in THE TEN, a film that proves once and for all that the Ten Commandments can be damn funny as is absolutely filled with more homo-erotic subtext than you probably realized. THE TEN essentially pulls together all of the adult actors for WET HOT AMERICAN SUMMER (including non-"State" players Paul Rudd and Janeane Garofalo) as well as an impressive ensemble cast, including Adam Brody, Winona Ryder, Ron Silver, Liev Schreiber, Oliver Platt, Famke Janssen, Gretchen Moll, Jessica Alba, Justin Theroux, Rob Corddry, and Bobby Cannavale. Rudd acts as our narrator, who stands before oversize commandment tablets to introduce 10 short, interconnecting tales illustrating (often in quite rude ways) each of the sinful rules of the road of life. Mol goes to Mexico and has a passionate love affair with Jesus H. Christ; a doctor (played by the film's co-writer Ken Marino) leaves a pair of scissors in a patient during an operation as a goof; Ryder falls in love with a ventriloquist's dummy, steals it, and makes passionate love (this would be your "price of admission" moment); a group of men hang out naked every Sunday to get out of going to church; the aforementioned doctor goes to prison and falls in love (in one of the films most touching segments, complete with ass rape!); there's even an animated sequence about a lyin' Rhino (voiced by Jon Benjamin). Although THE TEN would never be mistaken for a "religious" film, Marino and co-writer David Wain (who also directed) do tackle just about every sacred cow under the sun. Some of the sequences (such as the one involving Rudd's dissolving marriage in the wake of an affair) are more based in reality than others (such as a silly tale involving two neighbors trying to outdo each other's purchasing power by buying up all the CAT scan machines they can find), but they are all varying degrees of wildly funny and totally taboo. I was actually kind of moved by a couple of the stories, in particular one about a pair of black teen twins who finally get to meet their real father. And while it's hard to single out individual standout performances, Ryder's fearless take on a woman obsessed with a piece of wood is scarily convincing. She might give the performance of her career here. And her sex scene is smokin' hot. THE TEN is not for the weak of heart or for those who like their bible verses a little more on this side of Narnia. According to the press notes, the idea for this film was somewhat inspired by Krzysztof Kieslowski's DECALOGUE project, and you know what? I have no trouble believing that. The writing here is as smart as it is shocking, and the film knows no bounds in its attempts to make you laugh, even as you squirm in your seat. Did I mention the male ass rape? Essentially the film is what it creates: a profile (or 10 hysterical profiles) of bad behavior, and it would be pure sacrilege to miss this one. Capone capone@aintitcool.com
