I am – Hercules!! It’s a laughtrack-happy sitcom, from longtime laughtrack-happy sitcom writer Tom Hertz (“Less Than Perfect,” “Married To The Kellys,” “The King of Queens,” “Freddie”), about a long-married couple, a newly engaged couple and a dirtball bachelor. It stars David Spade (“Just Shoot Me,” “Eight Simple Rules”) and Patrick Warburton (“Seinfeld,” “The Tick,” “The Venture Bros.”) - who previously worked together on the big screen’s “Emperor’s New Groove” - as well as Oliver Hudson (“The Mountain”), Bianca Kajlich (“Boston Public,” “Rock Me, Baby”) and the great Megyn Price (“Lateline,” “Grounded For Life”). If you think the writing will be on par with “King of Queens” or “Freddie,” you’d be right. If you think Warburton and Spade will squeeze every drop of comedy out of spotty material, you’d be right there too. If you think Kate Hudson’s brother Oliver will be very handsome, we’re all still on the same page my friend. Longtime AICN spy “MiraJeff” likes “Rules” (and, perhaps, sitcoms generally). “The real reason Rules of Engagement works isn't it's invigorating mix of fresh and familiar faces,” writes he, “but because it's writing staff is genuinely funny.”

Greetings AICN, MiraJeff here with a look at the Rules of Engagement, the new CBS comedy premiering tonight. The show stars David Spade, Patrick "Puddy" Warburton and Oliver "Son of Goldie, Brother of Kate" Hudson. Now normally, this is the type of show that TV critics take a collective dump on. It's generic, in that it's like just about every other relationship comedy on the air ('Til Death comes to mind), however, it's generic in a good way, and by that, I'm mainly referring to Senor Spade. I'm not sure whether or not I've revealed my obsession with all things Spade-related on AICN in the three years I've been writing for the site, but here goes nothing. David Spade is the world's least recognized comedic genius. His 1998 HBO special, Take the Hit, is the single funniest thing I have ever seen. Ever. As in, for all time. And I was 14 in 1998, so I guess you could say my comedic sensibilities haven't evolved much. In fact, if you check out Amazon.com, I have the privilege of being its first customer review. So basically, David Spade can do no wrong in my book, although The Benchwarmers certainly wasn't right. Now many of you might choose to just write-off this review because I'm genetically inclined to adore David Spade, but there's a little bit more to it than that. To begin with, I think one of the hardest things to review is the television sitcom, mainly because it is so inherently obvious. Setup, punchline, move on to the next joke while advancing the recycled plot. It's hard distinguishing between what's good and bad writing, and what's good and bad delivery. Of course, there are exceptions to this. Currently, The Office and the charming Knights of Prosperity don't really adhere to this transparent format. But the real reason Rules of Engagement works isn't it's invigorating mix of fresh and familiar faces, but because it's writing staff is genuinely funny. I don't really know who to credit these first three episodes to, but I will say they were above-average in the laughs department. In fact, dare I say this show seems like it could have actual sticking power, and be a viable replacement for the Eye's departing king of sitcoms, King of Queens. The set-up is pretty mucb been there, done that, especially if you've had the misfortune of watching 'Til Death, a show I half-heartedly reccomended which has since grown as stale as decade-old bread. Since Warburton will forever be known as Puddy, that's what we'll call him here. Puddy basically plays the Brad Garrett role of deep-voiced man's man who has been married for 12 years and knows what to expect from his better half. Sample line when they're in bed together: "Wanna do it again?" "Ha! Again? Remember that?" For some inexplicable reason, Puddy is friends with Adam, who is significantly younger than him. Adam has just gotten engaged to Jennifer, who is played by a smokin' hot Bianca Kajlich, who I learned from IMDB, is engaged to Landon Donovan and unable to physically scream. I guess that means I'm safe if she ever catches me lurking outside her apartment building. As ridiculously attractive as Kajlich is, I suspect she'll connect with audiences because she feels attainable, which might also explain how we went along with the notion that Kevin James could ever be married to someone as gorgeous as Leah Remini while living in Queens, no less. Warburton is equally impressive, getting the most out of his baritone voice and imposing barrel-chested physique. Jeff is less of a caricature than Puddy was, and his blunt delivery could win him some new young fans who weren't around to witness The Golden Age of Seinfeld. Megyn Price is another unheralded TV star, being a veteran of the underrated Donal Logue-starrer Grounded For Life. She doesn't really get the chance to shine, and you can certainly see her being the smallest focus of the show, but the point is, she doesn't get in the way. So often, these sitcoms are plagued by one bad casting decision where an actor or actress goes over the top in an attempt to stand out from the rest of the group. Yes, I'm talking about everyone in The Class. But Price lets the men do their thing and steals scenes where she can. Hudson is the weakest acting link in the cast, but every now and then, he shows glimpses of why producers seem to have made him the series' main character. He's obviously the best looking guy on the show, and he manages to have a personality, which sets him apart from most bland pretty-boys who wind up on shows like these. He's not as charming as his half-sister Kate, but the guy's not half-bad, and he'll grow into the role and adjust to sharing the screen with a couple of sitcom veterans. Maybe the problem is that these guys are 40 and he looks about 25, so he doesn't really fit in or make their friendship seem believable, but like I said, the chemistry will continue to improve, and for now, I like his back and forth with Kajlich. Both of them have Dawson's Creek on their resumes, which gets them each a gold star in my book. Spade's enthusiasm is infectious. He brings a unique energy to every scene that his co-stars are unable to match. Spade holds the copyright on sarcasm, and his devilish "Did I just say that?" delivery is one of a kind, not to mention, he gets the best lines. Seinfeld vet Andy Ackerman directs and this being a Happy Madison production, Sandler's right-hand-man Jack Giarraputo produces alongside Tom Hertz and Doug Robinson. The IMDB lists the Sandman as an executive producer but his name wasn't on any of the three episodes I previewed. The bottom line is that this show has the potential to be really good. My only complaint is that there wasn't enough Spade. If his character doesn't exist, this show becomes a 'Til Death clone about how simultaneously lame and wonderful marriage is. Throwing a wise-cracking single guy in the mix is not only a smart idea, its a necessity to the success of the show, and if I were Giarraputo, I'd make sure Spade gets a few more minutes of screentime in each episode. It's hard when there are two sturdy couples and Spade's mixing it up with a new chick each week, but I think more of the guys-only stuff would benefit the show. Anyways, regardless of what you think of Spade, Puddy, or Goldie Hawn's offspring, you should check out the Rules of Engagement pilot when it airs Monday at 9:30. Because if anyone can post good numbers against a fading (yes, fading) Jack Bauer, it's David Wayne Spade. That'll do it for me, folks. And fellow Spade fans, don't be shy. Feel free to email me at mirajeff@aintitcool.com. 'Til next time, this is MiraJeff signing off...

Entertainment Weekly gives it a “C-minus” and says:

… one duo still has lots of sex and the other, less. It's funny because it's true! Or it's not that funny at all. Rules is similar to Fox's grimly unamusing comedy 'Til Death, but it has one major advantage: deadpan, rubbery Patrick Warburton. In Rules, he plays his married version of Puddy on Seinfeld, which enables him to get laughs out of used-up jokes like, Men don't like foreplay but they really like football. …

USA Today gives it one and a half stars (out of four) and says:

… virtually comedy-free … Rules is one of those sitcoms that makes people who hate sitcoms hate sitcoms. Nothing lands, nothing makes sense, nothing remotely reminds you of life on this planet as most of us know it. … Rules does boast one first-class comic actor in Warburton, a consistently funny, usually deadpan performer who can switch to high-pitched fluster with equal effect. …

TV Guide says:

… delivers few sparks in either the comic or amorous arenas. … Rules would be more engaging if it weren't so familiar, but there is at least one consistently hilarious performance: Patrick Warburton (Puddy from Seinfeld) as Jeff, a miserly sourpuss of a Neanderthal guy's guy — Russell calls him "Magilla" — who delivers his wisecracks with a droll, heavy-lidded deadpan. He's well matched by Megyn Price (Grounded for Life) as his long-suffering but secretly amused spouse. As the less experienced lovebirds, Oliver Hudson and Bianca Kajlich are pretty but bland, a condition that permeates this sluggish show. …

The Los Angeles Times says:

… nothing especially new or brilliant here … The jokes are typical War of the Sexes stuff, with the men, as usual, coming off as the dumber, weaker party — ruled, as they are, by their genitals. … But it is, for all that, a sweet-tempered show, well made and well played, and in addition to Price it has the benefit of Patrick Warburton (still most famously Puddy on "Seinfeld") as Price's husband. The aggressively deadpan Warburton is an actor who as much as any may be accounted a matter of taste, but he is not quite the Johnny One Note his parts can make him seem. The writers have constructed a more or less real person around his particular gifts, and he locks well with Price. His ongoing comic effect is rooted in the fact that he's got the body and the voice of an old-school superhero in a post-superhero world: John Wayne with nothing more to worry about than how much money his wife spends on face cream. …

The Washington Post says:

… There are funny moments here and there, and the cast is very likable. However, the jokes tend to play off stereotypes and are predictable. Unless there's more variety in the writing, viewers may not find this comedy very engaging.

The Chicago Sun-Times says:

… "Rules" and "'Til Death" bear exactly the same ups and downs. The ups: essentially a good cast, plus sporadic funny lines. The downs: many un-funny lines, plus rehashed storylines from a thousand episodes of married-life sitcoms dating all the way back to "The Honeymooners." Why are "'Til Death" and "Rules" similarly troubled? Probably because they aim for middle America and successfully strike that watered-down target.” …

The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel says:

… a depressing new sitcom that's so much like any number of depressing old sitcoms it should be stamped: "Made from 100 percent recycled materials." … Warburton, who played the hilariously odd Puddy on "Seinfeld," still has that half-stoned, half-John-Wayne thing going on, but he has very little to work with. …

The Hollywood Reporter says:

… This is the world built by the traditional primetime broadcast network comedy, and it's perhaps why the form itself is in crisis. It needs a new hook, and "Rules" ain't it. On the other hand, it does have some clever lines, and any show that co-stars Patrick Warburton ("The Tick," "Seinfeld's" Puddy) and David Spade ("The Showbiz Show," "Just Shoot Me") is nothing if not well cast. So kudos to casting directors Leslie Litt and Suzanne Goddard Smythe for having the good sense to get these guys. Warburton in particular is a comic gold mine, based on his bone-dry monotone delivery alone. I'd pay to hear him read a wine list, and would no doubt laugh heartily at it.…

Variety says:

… Providing further evidence that execution trumps premise every time, "Rules of Engagement" covers virtually the same territory as Fox's dreary "'Til Death" in a far livelier and funnier manner, buoyed by Patrick Warburton's dry-to-the-bone turn as the 12-years-married guy to Oliver Hudson's just-engaged neighbor. David Spade triangulates the stages-of-romance field as a bar-trawling sleazebag, and even he's less annoying than usual, with two of the first three episodes revealing an assured, risque, semi-cynical air that should dovetail nicely with "Two and a Half Men" …

Season Sets Under $20!!