Here's another look at ANALYZE THIS....
**I recently caught a Sneak Preview of ANALYZE THIS and this is what I had to say about it**
ANALYZE THIS
THE MATRIX!!!!!!!!!! That's all I gotta say. Even though Keanu Reeves and Laurence Fishburne bug the living bejesus out of me, every clip they showed in the trailer for the upcoming futuristic thriller THE MATRIX will make up for it. Oh no. Wait a minute, Folks, I smell another DARK CITY amongst Hollywood hype. What do I mean? I'll tell you! When I first saw the trailer for DARK CITY, you can imagine how stained my jeans were, but after THE MATRIX trailer... OH G O D! Okay, anyway, that just about put a reservation sticker on every seat in every cinema in America with my name on it the day that THE MATRIX hits general release.
And another thing... what in Edgar Allen Poe's holy name is up with two of the most inane films out in theatres right now battling for No. 1 at the Box Office this weekend? Okay, I can possibly see how PAYBACK's making out pretty well, cuz that Mel Gibson's a bad mutha...
SHUT YO MOUTH!
I'm just talkin about Blue Mel! Anyway, but MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE? Is this a joke? Pardon me, Mr. Costner, but you suck! What did you do? SLEEP through that performance? You know, I can kinda realize why so many people are piling into the theatre to see MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE. Truthfully, I can. IT'S BECAUSE KEVIN COSTNER DOESN'T LIVE THROUGH THE END! Yeah, sure, every so often there's an old, fat woman sitting in the back row, munchin' down on those goobers and hot dogs that actually cares about the picture, but otherwise they're just going because SHE'S ALL THAT was sold out.
ANALYZE THIS
Let me get this out of the way first...
Lisa Kudrow sucked. Chazz Palminteri sucked.
Okay, now that THAT'S out of the way, I can get on to reviewing the funniest film since THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY.
My favorite experience in probably all my life is to be able to sit in a packed theatre with fellow subUrbians and watch a Sneak Preview of a film. The reason I pick a Sneak Preview is because NO ONE knows what to expect. Or atleast very little. Like with THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY, I had NO idea what to expect. There was no possible way anyone was able to ruin the whole hair gel bit for me. And that's why I had so much fun. With ANALYZE THIS, I did know a little, but not enough to take away the humour.
Robert DeNiro is funny. Now, this shouldn't be any surprise, but Robert DeNiro is damn funny. And I'm pretty sure that most of his funniest lines in ANALYZE THIS were ad-libbed. After seeing this film, it's gonna be kinda hard to take Bob DeNiro seriously. All I'm gonna be able to think about is that great, great line after he tells Billy Crystal about all the "wierd" problems he's having and how he broke down crying after seeing a commercial with a kid playing with a coupla puppies... "Slap a pair of tits on me, and I'm a woman!" That got me. I was laughing into the credits.
Billy Crystal is funny. Of course this is no surprise to anyone, but Billy hasn't been too funny in awhile. He's gonna make a semi-comeback with this film. He's so believable as a psychiatrist, it's scary. But you just can't help but love him.
Once again, Harold Ramis and his ability to direct, splits the sides of the public. If one guy can get out of college and write his first screenplay with ANIMAL HOUSE printed on the cover page, he's got my seven bucks no matter what! Seriously, Harold Ramis knows exactly what he's doing. It really shows when we see Robert DeNiro break down crying after seeing a Packard Bell-esque commercial.
ANALYZE THIS will scoop up what's left of the broken bottle that the 'message' was left in and 'payback' the studio all the money that it needs to qualify this movie as a big hit. Look for it at the box office. You'll see it up there with the next mind-numbing piece of garbage that the people are all drooling over.
Go see ANALYZE THIS. Stay away from all the crap that's out there. You'll, for once, feel that your money was actually spent on something that's worth two hours.
Mango
