Our evil genius in Los Angeles has been at it again, this time turning his evil eyes (both of em) on New Line's DESPERATION. Here's a project that I would love to take a gander at, as I'm a fan of Stephen King flicks. I can't help myself, I'm just drawn to them all, but I only buy the good ones for my home collection like SLEEPWALKERS, MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE, THINNER.... oh wait... NOOOOO I don't have those.... I was just foolin' Ha Ha... right? I have better taste than that.... don't I? Well, Moriarty is a man of real taste, so here he is to fill you in...
Hey, Head Geek...
“Moriarty” here.
It’s a New Year... 1999... and that means two things. First, we’re working frantically to hone our final draft of the 1998 Year In Review, with our choices of the Best and the Worst the year had to offer. Other critics are already speaking up, and as I read my favorites, it’s intimidating; our list is bound to be eccentric, although maybe not as weird as Roger Ebert’s exhaustive 10 Best. Our list is bound to be wordy, although maybe not as ridiculously long as Franknseuss’s masterful Usenet Spectacuganza. The pressure’s on, and we hope to have everything taken care of by next Friday.
In the meantime, we’re also polishing up our 1999 Revision of My Evil Master Plan To Save The World (copyright, trademark, all rights reserved, etcetera, ad infinitum). The document as a whole totals over 73,000 single-spaced pages -- no surprise to those of you who think I’m a wordy bastard.
As I reviewed Section XXIII, Paragraph 22, Sub-section b, I discovered that my research into the military uses of adrenochrome combined with advanced hypnotherapy are starting to yield some profound results. Maybe that private army of conscience-less killers is closer than I thought. The toughest thing about doing the research is obtaining the pure adrenochrome. Since the only source is a live human adrenal gland, I’ve been forced to mine my own henchmen, in effect milking them. To guarantee maximum production, I’ve been running them through a specially-designed funhouse, jacking their fear levels through the roof, then “getting while the getting’s good,” so to speak. It’s a lot of hassle, though, and I’ve been looking for a new way to accomplish the same effect.
I may have found it in one of New Line’s upcoming projects, provided they follow through and make the film. Right now, what they have on their hands is a great isolated group under attack movie like DAWN OF THE DEAD or ALIENS or Carpenter’s classic THE THING. It’s nice to be able to report, too, since so often Stephen King adaptations are painful to witness.
The film I’m referring to, of course, is DESPERATION, based on one of two novels King released together two years ago. Both novels were connected, but in strange, tangential ways, and of the two, DESPERATION was the more obvious choice for film adaptation. In fact, I’d say that this and THE MIST are the last two great King horror stories awaiting adaptation. Frank Darabont has long been attached to THE MIST, and it would be great to see Frank make an old-fashioned ‘50s horror film with ‘90s technology. King has chosen to adapt DESPERATION himself, working with one of his personal favorite directors, Mick Garris.
The script for the film is excellent, showing that King has finally gotten the hang of compressing and reshaping his own material. There’s still a few novelistic touches to the script that make it read a little long, but the story really hustles. The nature of the film’s main evil is kept secret long enough to make it truly mysterious, but is revealed early enough to really set the stakes for the film’s conclusion. The ensemble cast is written well, and they’re made genuinely human, something that’s very important in a film like this.
Think back to when you first saw NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD. Those characters weren’t movie stars... they were just poor luckless sods who ended up trapped in the same house. They behaved like any of us would, emotions swinging wildly. EVIL DEAD 2 is the same way... and DAWN OF THE DEAD... and THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE... the best fright films work because we identify with the people onscreen.
I bring this up because New Line is trying to monkey with this movie, pushing movie stars into it that don’t belong. This isn’t a movie star movie. Dimension has the right idea. Cast a smart, well-respected cast and trust them to inject some class into the picture. The difference is the talent relationships you have at New Line. Cast this like a P.T. Anderson movie... indie actors with real credibility. I know Christopher Walken is interested in the role of Collie, the cop whose menacing presence kicks the film off. CAST HIM! You don’t need bigger names than this. Besides, he’s given one of the best King-based performances on record already in Cronenberg’s outstanding THE DEAD ZONE. If we believe in the people we’re watching, word of mouth will be far bigger than if you force big names into roles that they overpower.
Fans of this King novel will be pleased with his adaptation, and Mick Garris is definitely the man for the job. Here’s a guy who genuinely seems to get better every time out. He’s got a real understanding of King’s sensibilities, and his work with actors, the key to this film’s success, has gotten more confident with each film he makes. Steven Weber was a genuine surprise in Garris’s flawed but fascinating THE SHINING from a few years back. Garris has an eye for the unlikely casting that pays off in unexpected ways, and the studio should trust him to deliver the right group to make DESPERATION come to life.
Unfortunately, with the studio stalling, it looks like I’m going to be forced to run more funhouse experiments. You can stop the suffering, New Line. Give this film the go, and let’s get some real scares in theaters soon. Until then...
“Moriarty” out.
