You know what?
I thought it was supposed to be easy to pick out the 10 megaton bombs of cinematic excrement 2000 miles away.
I thought there was no way in hell that BRIDE OF CHUCKY could be anything more than a little piece of interesting filmic couch lent.
Well so much for me thinking.
This movie is fun. You may hear from 200 critics that it is dung. They are all wrong. BRIDE OF CHUCKY is why series should go on. Every once in a while, someone comes along and says.... “Hey, you know what would be a lot of fun!?” and BAM you get a movie like this.
Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a four star film in that Merchant Ivory sort of way, but I guarantee you I’ll watch this film 50% more than I will SCREAM. Why? Because they don’t kill Rose McGowan. Of course Rose McGowan isn’t in the film.
Why will I watch this more than SCREAM. Cause I think this is just a ton of damn fun. I went and saw it with Father Geek, Tom Joad and Quint (who was seeing it for his third time in as many days).
Went and saw it at the Highland 10. Didn’t really see any trailers that stuck in my head. Instead I’ll just get straight into the flick. (wow Harry, that’s awfully kind of ya) Think nothing of it kid.
I’m kinda rendered a bit mute on this one. I just want to type GO SEE IT GO SEE IT GO SEE IT over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again again again again.
But I ain’t gonna go and do that. Wait... I did. Dammit brain I told you not to do that.
Anyway I guess a ton of credit goes to the technical people and the folks that wrote and directed.
I’ll start with what came first... The script.
Don Mancini wrote this Chucky film. But ya know what, he wrote all the others too. What the hell man. Ya know this is almost the sort of thing that causes psychotic breakdowns. He really nailed this movie. The perfect amount homage, the perfect amount of popcorniness, the perfect amount of parmesian cheese, the perfect grandeur of death scenes and really snappy dialogue. In short I was geeking consistently through the film.
Now you have to be a horror film fan. If you often times have a furled brow and a rolling of eyes problem. Stay away. This is a movie for people that buy FANGORIA. For the people that love FREDDIE KRUEGER, MICHAEL MYERS, JASON VORHEES, LEATHERFACE, The TALL MAN, PIN HEAD and yes even CHUCKY.
And it pays tribute to all of em. It celebrates in it’s own perversity. When Jennifer Tilly and Chucky do the thing you did with your sisters Barbie and Ken dolls, what you did with your Luke and Leia 12 inch dolls, that you were then horrified by RETURN OF THE JEDI for doing. I mean, that was just wrong. I’m sorry. All of a sudden thousands of perverted elementary and junior high and high school kids felt pangs of guilt for that plastic forced incest thing. There should have been some hints. I mean... sheesh... Luke wanted Leia for two films. And not in that sisterly way. The dude never USED THE FORCE dagdammit.
Whoa, I got distracted. But anyway back to BRIDE OF CHUCKY. This is the sort of movie for which the world created Jennifer Tilly. Silly temptress stuff. When she’s making goo goo eyes at Chucky... well you just get the idea that she would tire of the standard goth-dudes and would seek a little vinyl loving.
The real moments of the movie for me are the scenes where Chucky looks at the Tiffany doll and does something. Like when he does the ‘air masturbation’ move to lampoon the ‘oh so goody two shoes’ kids in the front seats.
The plot line is simplicity in motion. Dolls need to get to cemetary, dolls trick kids into it. Dolls kill tons of people.
BUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTT....
It gets way frigging cool.
When the kids get confused about what happened... well it is great. I love the dolls trying to one ups each other in the glorius method of killing. Oh sure the Christian Science Monitor probably starts twitching like a nun finding Playboys in the confession booth.
Dang it, I forgot I was gonna run down the talent listings.
RONNY YU. Now for 99.9% of the public, he don’t mean a damn thing. But for those of us that saw THE BRIDE WITH WHITE HAIR... well we saw Ronny Yu at his super-coolest best. And then our hearts were broken by that damn kangaroo flick that had action figures sitting on shelves forever. But here, his stylish and lovely story treatment works perfectly. He doesn’t lose fact that he has 4 main characters, and two of them are just plan plastic as can be. But he managed to get performances out of them suckers.
And the two kids didn’t suck. That’s really an accomplishment, because my problem with all the extra people in the prior Chucky films... well I just wanted Chucky to win. Here... I still wanted Chucky to win... no... I wanted Tiffany to win. Noooo... I wanted them to wander off in the graveyard mist happily ever after and the moon set in the distance. Yeah.... yeah...
PETER PAU.... His cinematography is legendary in Hong Kong cinema. THE KILLER, BRIDE WITH WHITE HAIR, and well this film looks as good as those. Amazing how nice his shooting looks when he isn’t filming plastic dummies like VAN DAMME. I can’t wait to see more of his work.
KEVIN YAGHER. Ya know... Frank Oz has Yoda and Miss Piggy. Kevin has Chucky. Chucky just kicks ass in this film. That little fart is just so damn cool. His facial expressions during his dialogue... which is very snappy. and the reactions from TIFFANY... wow... fun fun fun fun fun...
I want to see more CHUCKY and TIFFANY movies. I want them to do a series of ROAD TO flicks. They are a classic comedy team. Of course it’s just for a segment of society that many feel should be wiped off the face of the planet, but just let em try. We’ve been watching movies like this while you’ve been watching REMAINS OF THE DAY. You think you can take us?!?!?!?!
Do you know how to kill two assholes in a bridal suite with one throw of a champagne bottle?
Do you know how to use your air conditioner, a fan blower, a buncha nails and a doll to kill a Sheriff?
I do. and dammit these survival films will keep me alive whenever I’m stuck in a horror film. I won’t make a mistake. I’ll see the tell tale signs.
And if ya knew what was good for ya, you would too.
