Wow, Quint can read. Amazing what you find out about these sailors these days. I've heard rumors about him and a yellow rubber duck, but I'm gonna be nice and not bring it up. Well folks I'm gonna check to see what else I can get up real quick here cause I want to write three reviews tonight.
All right, all right. Y'all know me. Quint back once again, this time with some hope for the upcoming Steve Martin flick, Bowfinger's Big Thing.
After returning home from an interesting night watching Nosferatu, accompanied by an ensemble of musicians, at the reigning place of coolness better known as the Alamo Drafthouse, I decided to check out the site. Well, my eye was instantly drawn to the Bowfinger's Big Thing review. You see, I have the script for this flick, I've had it for a few months now, but didn't want to read it. Over the summer when I was in the City of Angels (yeah, right), the same trip where my interview with Mr. Wood was completed, I decided I needed to journey to Universal Studios. I had a dream. I had a goal. I was gonna get past security and find my way to the Jaws attraction. I needed to face that shark again and I'll be damned if I was gonna be caught helpless on that stupid tram. Anyway, as I was slinking my way around the backlot (wrong turn) I bumped smack dab into Steve Martin himself. I had to introduce myself. I told him I was Quint. He said, "The Quint from that website?" I was so flabbergasted that he knew of me. I told him I was. Steve smirked, turned around and started ruffling around the back of his little golf cart and pulled out a stack of papers. It was the script. He told me it was only the second draft, but that I'd get the gist of the story. He then told me he needed to get back onto the set. By the way, I believe he was in costume. He was wearing this bright orange shirt. It looked like something a "wild and crazy guy" would wear.
Anyway, I wanted to read the script so bad, but I was worried it would suck. I think Steve knew that I would write up a review of the script and I figured that if I didn't read it, then I couldn't write a bad review. Well, when I saw that there was already a bad review (of the actual film, no less) I said told myself screw it and said, "All right!!! I WILL!"
So, I feverishly read through the script. The only thing I can think of is that the version of Bowfinger that this guy saw was so rough that none of the hilarious moments in the script were realized on film yet. Either that or he just doesn't have a sense of humor, but I kinda doubt that. I had a hell of a lot of fun with the script. From what I read, I believe that Bowfinger and Mr. Navin "I was born a poor, black child" Johnson are the only two characters to come from Steve Martin's mind that are just plain perfect roles for Martin to play. I mean, while reading the script, I couldn't imagine anyone else besides Steve Martin playing Bowfinger. With lines like, "I'm tired of being screwed by the rich!!!" and "This major movie tells about the joy, the sadness, the grief and the... joy and sadness of being alive in this area at this time which is now." Those were probably some of the lesser lines in the flick, but I didn't want to ruin the really great jokes before they had their chance to attack the audience's (namely, you) funny bones.
I had no idea that Eddie Murphy was playing the part of Kit Ramsey. I had envisioned somebody like Viggo Mortison (really bastardized that last name, sorry) as the Rational Positivist who gets thrills from... well let's just say showing something to the L.A. Lakers. I guess Murphy could play the part and not fuck it up, but I'd have to see him do it just to make sure.
The fun of the script wasn't just Bowfinger and group chasing Kit around with a camera. The fun part was that Kit had just gotten over his paranoia of being followed by aliens and then having Bowfinger and company trying to make a sci- fi movie starring Kit, but without his knowledge. Of course they can't just film Kit walking around, they have to get some of the other actors in the same shot, with dialogue to boot. Example that will hopefully help clarify the last part: Kit is sitting in a restaurant and one of the actresses (Carol in the script) walks up to him and says, "You left your briefcase, Jane gave it to me and I opened it. I saw the photos of the aliens. Why? (Screams) WHY!!!!!!!" She goes on about how he loves the aliens more than her. "You preferred alien love!!!!" Of course he has no clue what's going on and his reality starts to break. It was really funny as the script got on and you see his reality start to crack, then splinter, then bust wide open.
Anyway, that's just one example, I won't give anymore away right now. I just wanted to let you Steve Martin fans out there know that the movie might not suck after all. That's it from me for today. Until next time, Constant Readers.
-Quint
