Hey folks, Harry here... boy - people are just being vicious to SON OF THE MASK. I'm kinda morbidly curious at this point. At least I can claim that my father pushed me into seeing it, and I had no way of stopping him, being that I'm stuck in a wheelchair. Heh. Here ya go...
Harry, or whoever reads this,
I just caught Son of the Mask, and I feel obligated to warn people about this turd. I don't care how much you liked the original movie or if you like Jamie Kennedy or whatever, just please trust that instinct you got when you first saw the trailer and thought to yourself, "I do say, that looks mighty fucking horrible." The Razzie people are going to have a field day with this one. (Actually, they're probably going to have fun with all of 2005. It's perplexing how we've only hit February and we've already seen some of the worst movies ever made.)
I'll try to keep this brief because I fear I'll get a tumor if it occupies my mind much longer. Although I was fan of the comic and was disappointed that they abandoned its dark tone and turned it into a Jim Carrey vehicle, I enjoyed the original Mask movie. But this, Christ, I don't know where to begin. First off, it's sickening how much it tries to be a light-hearted kiddy movie. The original had that perfect tone which went over well with both kids and adults, but this crap is aimed right at junior. I could go on for hours about the abysmal CGI; I understand this thing is supposed to be cartoonish (and therefore somewhat unrealistic), but it ends up looking like a Tom & Jerry cartoon.
As for the actors, I kind of like Jamie Kennedy when he's not being Annoying Jamie Kennedy (i.e., the Scream movies) - I thought he was funny in Malibu's Most Wanted and his TV show - but in Son of the Mask, the director seems to have forced him to act like a whiny douchebag when "normal" (this guy should not be doing family comedies) and to do his best Jim Carrey impression when under the mask's possession. I think when Dumb & Dumberer was released, the studio folks heard all the people complimenting the guy playing Lloyd and just thought that was the way to go about things in the next Jim Carrey-less sequel to a Jim Carrey movie. Problem is, unlike Dumberer, Kennedy isn't playing the same character, so there's no reason to be doing a Carrey impression. I feel I would've liked him a lot more if he'd put his own spin on it, but unfortunately that's not the case.
Then there's Alan Cumming; seriously, if you ever want to piss me off, just cast this guy in a movie I'm seeing. In his never-ending quest to give gay people a bad name, he gives yet another performance as an annoying, over-the-top, trying-so-hard-to-be-funny-and-completely-failing jackass. Bob Hoskins, who shouldn't be doing a cartoonish comedy unless it's Roger Rabbit 2, shows up and makes us wonder how the hell he's allowed himself to sink this low. Nothing gets on my nerves more than seeing a bona fide actor taking embarrassing roles like this, but I guess I should be used to that after watching DeNiro sleepwalk through every role he's taken since Heat. The rest of the cast, like the starring actors, seem like they just showed up for the paycheck then went home and hoped their families wouldn't find out they were a part of this trainwreck.
I could go on, but I've already wasted two hours of my life and four paragraphs on this festering movie that can only be described as sewage. After watching White Noise, Alone in the Dark, Hide & Seek, and now Son of the Mask, I think I'm going to stay the hell away from the theatre until May or June.
Call me NoFancyNetAlias.
