Hi, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab...
I’m not normally a fan of internet petitions. They carry very little weight with most companies, but in a case like this, I can see how this might help demonstrate genuine interest in something. See what you think:
Hey Harry,
As you might have heard, Lloyd Kaufman is hard at work on a Toxic Avenger novelization. As Lloyd says "Most novelizations come out when the movie is released, but we’ve brilliantly waited twenty years for this one!"
But there's a problem...nobody wants to publish the damn thing! I had the chance to talk to the man himself recently and he said the book publishers only want non-fiction books (in the vein of Lloyds previous two) and apparently don’t think a fiction book based a twenty year old horror/gore/slapstick movie about a hideously deformed creature of superhuman size and strength is a good idea (idiots).
It’s time for the fans to rally together and say “We want the friggin’ book!” If you’ve ever read any of Lloyd’s other works, you’ll know that they’re just as insane as his movies (“The Erotic Components of Colostomy Bags,” yikes). Toxie deserves to join the great literary icons of our time!
All the Tromites out there need to write to their favorite book publisher and show support for the Toxic Avenger book! Also, sign the brand new online petition RIGHT HERE!!
Troma depends on its fans, so let’s get out there and show ‘em how much we love Toxie!
- Toxie’s Illegitimate Love Child
Lloyd Kaufman is one of God’s most beautiful freaks. Do the right thing, people. Sign that petition now.
"Moriarty" out.
