Big Lebowski review
Published at: Aug. 5, 1998, 4:16 a.m. CST by headgeek
Saw BIG LEBOWSKI tonight. Pure joy. Let me set you up on how today was, where
my head was at that this completely out there in left field film happened to be in the exact
same field I was in.
I didn't sleep last night, I stayed up all day, and was fired up. Probably has something to
do with these vitamins. The ol body isn't used to getting healthy stuff placed into it. I
straightened up my room, because... well... Ronald Reagan Jr was coming to interview me
for C-NET. Wow, this was pretty cool. I realized at about 4am that there was no way I
was going to get 'useful sleep'. So I did what all good insane people would do, and just
continued writing reviews and getting them ready to post. So began my review writing
orgy. The night turned into day, and everything was going good.
At 0900 hours the crew of C-NET arrived. The producer gal was waaaay cute. In fact
she was too cute to be interviewing me. Where was Ron? He was asleep in the hotel,
catching some extra Z's, apparently he had a bumpy flight and his flight out of Dallas was
canceled, leaving him with a sleepless night. HAHAHAA we were even.
They had me take the camera on a tour of the house. Problem was, I was continually
making the camera dude and sound dude crack up. Plus a tree had been killed by a
lightning bolt sent from Hollywood to kill me, so the city's tree recycling machine was
grinding it up LOUDLY. After the tour, they just wanted to get a whole lot of pick up
shots of every little bitty thing in my house, so I could continue working on the site. I had
to do something, or I'd fall asleep.
After a while I hear a familiar voice in the living room. I think it is Reagan. It is it is it is a
Reagan! He's really a pretty damn cool guy. We begin chatting about film, his dad, his
past gigs, etc etc etc... We do this interview thing on sleepy couch, while Victor
MacLagen is pointing at me from the one sheet of THE INFORMER (really good movie).
He and I hit it off on camera pretty well. Nice flowing answers, clever dialogue, etc...
Problem is the Sound dude keeps messing up the sound. (we blame him, actually he was
faultless, but heck, that's no fun) Finally we get done with that and Ronny has to shoot
little teaser spots all around the house.
After that, he had to shoot an intro piece in front of my house. While the camera dude
and sound dude moved vehicles, Ronny, Cute producer chick and I stood around goofing.
We started talking about great journalists, and Charles Kuralt comes up. Well, I do an
excellent impression of him, so I start that. Well Ronny begins doing his version of .
Then we both compliment each other, and I go into Mickey Mouse, which he also does,
so I do Goofy, which he can't do. Then I bemoan the fact that I've been trying since I was
about 6 years old to do Donald Duck, but all I can do is the tantrum Donald does when he
gets frustrated. Then Ronny does his intro.
So we pack up and head to THREADGILLS where I have a... salad. And they have a
fantastic meal, a meal that only a week ago I could have. (notice the anguish as I write)
Ohhh to have the sweat buttery cornbread fall apart with the mere pressure of my tongue.
The fried animal flesh drenched in delicious cream gravy... ahhhhhhh. Actually to tell the
truth, this doesn't bother me at all, because I just don't think in those terms anymore. I
love going out with people that will eat a great meal, cause I can smell it. And as I eat my
salad, I can taste it too. Thereby satiating my hunger for delicious well prepared meals.
We leave there to go to Glen's. As we get to his home, I see Glen coming down the stair
gripping his crotch and making nasty suggestive tongue motions at me. This is the typical
Glen and Harry greeting (no, we're not gay, just hopelessly sophomoric and immature). Luckily the cameras were off, so noone will ever know...
D'OH!!! I just told you. Darn. Wish my delete and backspace keys worked! As Ronny
and the crew enter Glen's sparkling abode, they instantly notice the difference between he
and myself. Sparkling clean white walls bare of decoration and a spartan existence -
GLEN. Dusty dank dark house with scarcely a square inch of wall space to spare,
covered completely with coolness, floors dusty, an asthmatic's nightmare! Then Glen
spies the cute producer chick. His eyes do that... 'I've got a bed upstairs honeybun!' thing.
She doesn't notice, but Ronny seems awfully tired.
Ronny and crew head for the horse stables (we are in Texas ya know) to film the 'Texas'
shot, and we watch as Reagan is attacked by Glen's killer Arabian Assassin Horse that
feeds upon the live bodies of ex-president's children. Robogeek arrives to watch the
carnival, as everyone concerned is now in a goofy mood, I have infected all. Heh heh heh.
The rest of the filming was pretty uneventful except when they wanted to have me do a
character voice as a tease on the 'upcoming segment', so I did it in Mickey Mouse voice.
It gave everyone a strange look to see Mickey coming out of me, of course I have plenty
of space for characters to live in me. Producer lady says, "My boss told me to just be
completely uninhibited down here with y'all." Glen and I instantly look at each other and I
say in Mickey voice, "huhuhuhuh Gee whilikers"
After that, we were ready to go out to the Arbor. So Glen, Robogeek and I all pile into
the Robomobile and head out on the highway. Glen and I begin singing the theme to the
Gil Gerard Buck Rogers show, the Facts of Life theme, Greatest American Hero theme.
Robo begins driving eratically, almost killing all on the highway. It was quite frightening.
Finally we arrive at the Arbor, where Glen and I get out and kiss the ground for being
safely delivered from the deathchariot of RoboMasala. Ronny and crew arrive, and decide
to film us all.interacting with THE LINE PEOPLE!!! That's right THE LINE PEOPLE.
Those noble souls that attend all films, wait two hours in line, and never ever pay. The
glorious fraternity of men and women dedicated to the proliferation of free entertainment.
This was going to be a blast... problem was, none of the line people were in attendance.
They were all at the Richard Dreyfus dreck. Instead we had an empty line to film. Joy.
Now, being the observant type I am, I had been watching how the chain-smoking ushers
were opening the unopenable doors by kicking the bottom inside corner with their foot
then grabbing the door as it popped open and entering. This was mighty cool. In fact I
even practiced several times. Just in case. Sure enough they wanted a shot of me and me
merry band plus Ronny entering the theater. As we approached I was hanging out in
back.Glen and Robo and Ronny couldn't open the doors. Without breaking stride and
while reading the Dell comic adaptation of THE DIRTY DOZEN, I kicked the door open
and walked in. Man... I was friggin' James Dean, I was the coolest cat in town. And they
still couldn't get in. hahahaha.
When it was all done, we had to say goodbye to the cute producer babe, Ronny, and the
two dudes. Then it became important to kill an hour. So we went to Barnes and Noble
and flipped through every CD they had. Finally I settled on a CD of the 1937 radio
broadcast version of CAPTAIN BLOOD with the original cast reprising their roles. Being
a Flynn and Rathbone nut, this was nirvana.
We settle back into the line, which is now there. Whereas before, they didn't exist. Soon
they let us in, and.. well we awaited THE BIG LEBOWSKI.
First of all, I've been dying to see this film. All those people that reviewed the film for the
site that said things like that it was a great film, but mass audiences won't GET it, and the
review from Hallenbeck about it being one of the 'overrated Coen films' had me eager to
see which it was.
I LOVE THIS FILM. You know how PULP FICTION is a movie that creates a feeling
of cool, that leaves with you. The conversations you have are better, you walk cooler,
everything becomes an adventure, and it's a thrill to be alive and not dead on a toilet seat?
Well, THE BIG LEBOWSKI is a movie that creates a feeling of joy that left with me.
This movie starts off like that off all legends and tall tales.
This is a film of Pecos Bill and Paul Bunyon and John Henry. However, this time that
faithful teller of tales THE STRANGER is weaving a story of the city of Los Angeles.
This really is a Tall Tale about THE DUDE. Some of you may hate THE STRANGER, but
for me, he is a welcome campfire buddy. That voice that used to tell ya of those thrilling days of
cowboys and indians, but now... now he is telling us about THE DUDE. Now, I have to say that THE DUDE is one
helluva cool character. And I have to completely disagree with Hallenbeck. You see
these characters all belong in this film, this story, because it is all as absurd as these
characters are.
As for Hallenbeck's statement of there being no plot, well I can only figure he wasn't
paying much attention because... well, the plot was fairly obvious to me, and made perfect
sense IF you buy the fact that in some parallel universe (or maybe our own) there exists a
character of the DUDE. Once you buy that character, then everything else is perfect. We
have all known characters that remind us of these. I like to think of THE DUDE being a
grown up and burnt out Spicoli. You know, after the party he had from saving Brooke Shields, he
has moved on. He was obviously leveled by a massive wave, and took up the next most challenging sport
that real men play... bowling. But if you thought Spicoli was cool, just wait till you meet THE DUDE. He's so cool, there is an air of insanity that follows him everywhere.
Then there is the John Goodman character. Boy. I tell you. Between this and THE
BORROWERS, John Goodman is on my sweet list this year. He is a god in this film.
You know Fred Williamson's character in FROM DUSK TILL DAWN? Well imagine if
Fred was fat, white and tall as hell. Imagine he'd never been to Nam, but told ol Nam
stories anyway. Imagine if he was wholly filled of hot air. What a wonderful character.
As Hallenbeck stated, there are many classic moments given by this character. The line,
"That's what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!" will stay with me forever. Just
like, "Son of a bitch must pay" and "You are one ugly motherfucker" and "Hell I like you,
you can come over and fuck my daughter". You know, it's one of them lines that is just an
instant.. put it on your computer sound files for when you have an error. It's great. This
character is fantastic. Can't rave enough.
Then there are the other characters. This film is so rich with them. I won't even go into
spoiling the ensemble, or who is gonna pop outta what corner when. This is a blind film.
A movie you should go into, knowing only you are going to meet a character named THE
DUDE and his Nam storytelling bud. It's their adventure. And it's glorious. The plot is a
sweet simplistically complicated mess, which is absolutedly dead perfect for these
characters.
This isn't an elitist film. One of them, "Have you seen the new film at the Art House?"
kinda flicks. This is a movie that after you see it, I was in the lobby with my group, all of
whom had big ass smiles. We were all laughing and giggling and cheery. 'Everyone has a
laughing place, a laughing place to gooo ooo ooooooo,' mann, Uncle Remus had it right
and on this night, THE BIG LEBOWSKI was our own laughing place. It contains
elements from my smiley world.
What is Harry's Smiley World?
Well, you know, it contains elements of HEAVY METAL, FAST TIMES AT
RIDGEMONT HIGH, FOOTLIGHT PARADE, MURDER MY SWEET, THE
HONEYMOONERS, DISNEY'S PECOS BILL CARTOON, BODY HEAT and on and
on and on. This film has these elements, uses these elements and at no time seems
contrived, for in this celluloid world, these things exist. This is the way it is. No need to
check your brain at the door. This film produced the same endorphines that short circuit
the brain after a mass binge of chocolate, jogging and/or sex. It's gooooooooooooood.
Soooo gooooooooooooooood. I'm seeing it again in about 3 days. And when it hits
theaters I'll see it again and again.
This film caused joy in me. The same sort of joy ya get when you open up a can of
peanuts and strange exploding tube things come sproinging out and you are genuinely
surprised. Or when you shake a hand and a joy buzzer is in it, and you weren't expecting
it. Or when you have bought that perfect present, and have to remain quiet about it till
you give it. It's that giggling joyful feeling you get in your chest. That thing that causes
the ends of your mouth to pull up. It's a good thing. This was my experience, it had the
things in a film to cause this feeling in me. I hope it has the same affection for you as well.
But who knows, maybe it's your briar patch, but for me... it's my laughing place.