Hey folks, Harry here... well, you clicked on the story, so I imagine you know what to expect in reading a story about John Waters. If after reading this - you're vaguely curious about the world of John Waters, there is an excellent boxset of his films available. John Waters Collection (Hairspray / Pecker / Polyester / Desperate Living / Pink Flamingos / Female Trouble) After that -- I imagine you'll either love the man for always like me, or despise him with a hatred that burns like napalm in the morning. I've been lucky enough to see John Waters talk a couple of times in person and he is everything a fan of his would hope. Here ya go...
Hi Harry,
This is Paragonian, I'm sorry I haven't been reading your site as much anymore but hey that's what having a social life will do to your net time. The last and only time I've written to you was when I sent in my brief set visit on A Leonard Cohen Afterworld, later shittily renamed Highway. Matter of fact, after finally seeing Highway I don't think they used any of that fucking footage they were shooting that day. The only thing I even remember from the movie is the sequence they gorgeously shot in Pioneer Square which was wasted on their crappy, uninteresting story. Jake Gyllenhall's still a kickass actor and a truly nice guy though, fuck you Jared Leto. That was a long time ago and you put it on your site so I thought I'd send this in too.
Earlier today I attended a John Waters retrospective at the Paramount Theater here in Seattle by the man himself. I don't claim to be a genius on all things John Waters since I've only seen a few of his movies but I love what I've seen and I've heard good things about what I haven't gotten to yet. I got my ticket mainly because I've never been to the Paramount Theater before and I saw his hilarious opening to the Independent Spirit Awards. But Mr. Waters is interesting to me because he's a down to earth idosyncratic voice who has a true love and understanding of the outsider. He seems to be the type of celebrity that you could have a fun conversation with about the latest current events and pop culture. That's kind of the way his 'retrospective' was. I use ' because he didn't really delve into the work too much, he mostly told jokes and anecdotes about his life. At first it felt like a stand up comedy act but later felt like he was telling us stuff he only discusses with friends and family. For 27.00 I would've liked to have seen a cut of A Dirty Shame, but hey what am I bitching about, I got the cheapest seat and got to move up to the expensive seats with no one giving a shit.
Now, I'm gonna attempt to share some of the snippets of what was said but I'm known for being a good fuck, not for having a great memory so if someone else writes in with better information feel free to use their's instead. I didn't have a tape recorder with me since I'm a courier and not a reporter so if you want professionalism than you can start paying us you cheap bastards, what I'm giving you is GOLD, BABY, GOLD!
Anyway here's some of the interesting stuff I can remember right now.
Mr. Waters once signed a womans tampon that she pulled out in front of him and when asked by someone in the audience how the hell he managed to sign it he motioned with his hand and said 'John Waters'.
Mr. Waters wants it to be cool for poor kids to hate the rich again since him and his friends used to pull scams on the welfare system to get food stamps which they'd use to buy a bunch of crab meat and have big crab meat parties, he and Divine also used to shoplift a lot and he was always amazed that Divine could just walk out of a store carrying a stolen TV on one arm and a stolen chainsaw in the other while everyone wondered what was going on.
Mr. Waters loves Dogville and Kill Bill because they're not afraid to take their time and he wishes audiences were more militant like the one's in Cecil B. Demented with the Dogville audience going over and fighting The Alamo audience.
Mr. Waters likes to go to court hearings advertised in the paper and once went to one where a nurse was accused of sticking turds in sleeping patients mouths.
Divine died one week after the opening of one of my favorite movies, Hairspray but was able to read the first positive reviews of his life and I think should have been nominated for best supporting actor/actress/whatever. Mr. Waters still visits his grave from time to time to see what weird stuff is being left there.
Mr. Waters also thanked Seattle for being instrumental in Hairspray the Musical getting it's first taste of success. He said that when it first opened Harvey Fierstein's mom came over to John Waters' mom and said half jokingly 'Didn't we raise good boys'.They're also planning a Cry Baby The Musical to come out soon.
Mr. Waters said he first became interested in art because it could make people so angry and he used to have to steal the books he wanted from behind the counter of the library while the librarian was off with the 'normal' kids and he believes that if a kid is old enough to know of Naked Lunch and ask for it than he should be allowed to read it too.
Mr. Waters is a big believer in books and the library system as am I and he said that if you go over to someones house and they only have DVD's and no books than don't fuck them.
He recently filmed his segments for his A&E Biography which should air soon. A Dirty Shame comes out in September with a kickass cast in it, should be good.
He's a huge fan of William Castle and showmanship. Mr. Waters tried the scratch and sniff patches for his movies with one of the sniffs being fart. Lawyers made him make sure people could eat their scratch and sniff cards without dying before using the gimmick. When he was young and went to William Castle movies and had to sign the release in case he died he'd take it seriously and look around the theater wondering with glee who would be the one to die. He also thinks, as do I that people should be allowed to masturbate in theaters again.
Afterwards people stood around waiting to meet him but since I had nothing for him to sign and I didn't want to be another schmoe trying to impress him with my wit and intelligence I departed having been assured that no matter how sick or twisted or weird I may be there will always be people like John Waters to prove you can still make it no matter what.
Anyway, I'm sick of typing and you didn't pay $27.00 so everything else Mr. Waters said dies with me including how he used to kidnap homeless people to use as extras, how he used to teach a class of murderers in prison who thought he was 'fucked up' and his surefire advice on how to CHANGE THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT!
I now open myself up to being critized by assholes in the talkback section although I cannot respond as I have long ago forgotten my password.
Paragonian out.
