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Hi, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab...

Okay, so I was working on my enemies list earlier tonight. Of course Harry’s at the top of it. Bastard. Just when I’ve finally gotten over my enormous jealousy over the Beijing KILL BILL trip, he’s gearing up for Prague, where he’s got ridiculous amounts of coolness planned.

And now I have to add Quint to the list. Why? Well, I’ll let him tell you himself in what should be the first of several reports he files from... grrrrrr... New Zealand.

Ahoy, squirts! Everyone's favorite crusty ol' seaman, Quint, here. Sorry for my long absence from the site... I'm going to more than make up for it now.

While my family and friends welter in the Texas heat I rest comfortably in this chilly early winter time in the southern hemisphere. I am currently typing this beginning at almost 1am on July 4th in a very nice rented house in a suburb of Wellington, New Zealand. I'm writing this prologue as a means of getting a jump on the massive first report I will write and send in sometime this weekend.

Sometime tomorrow (tomorrow being 8 or 9 hours from now) I am promised an introduction to one of the true great (and woefully under-appreciated outside the geek community) actors living today, Mr. Christopher Lee as he does his only full day of pick-up shots playing the fallen Wizard Saruman in Peter Jackson's RETURN OF THE KING.

I've been in New Zealand for over a month now. I know most of you cynical bastards out there will have a hard time believing this, but this whole trip was financed 100% by me myself. Around $1500 of plane tickets, my share of the house rental (split 3 ways between me and my good friends Kraken and Mrs. Kraken) and food money for a month.

I'm a poor writer and $1500 is a massive sum of money for me to come up with, but when this opportunity came up I did what any self respecting geek would do... Get a job? Hell no! I sold pieces of my precious geek collection that I have slowly been amassing for the last 10 years or so. A rare 35mm print that I treasured... A prop from one of my favorite movies (The Dude's white jumpsuit from the dream sequence in THE BIG LEBOWSKI)... All to get myself out here to witness history being made. To be in Rivendell before it exists no longer. To touch the White Tree of Gondor. To stand in Shelob's creepy lair, inches from a shriveled dead orc hanging by webbing from the ceiling. In essence, to live the geek's dream.

Like many of you I read Harry's LOTR set reports with a great mixture of anticipation and barely controlled jealousy. Every movie geek has the longing, that immeasurable desire to have seen their favorite films being made, whether it's JAWS or KING KONG or THE MATRIX or DEEP THROAT. It was a pleasant torture that Knowles put us through then.

I can't top what Knowles did 3 years ago as I came to visit the set as guest of Peter Jackson not as press, thus there won't be many "live" reports. I assumed I was here as a movie geek and film fan... one lucky enough to share friends with Peter Jackson. It wasn't until a few days ago that I found out I was cool to write up my adventures... It should be interesting to hear the reaction out of New Line as they didn't even know I was out here until a week or so ago. hehe

So... I have slept and awoken again. It's a bright, beautiful day outside and I'm an hour away from seeing Christopher Lee do his thing. I still can't believe I'm out here... can't believe I can live a life that intersects with something as amazingly awesome as Christopher Lee performing Saruman. How did I get so lucky?

I'm not quite sure, but I'll do my best to spread the wealth and write up some nice reports to whet your appetites... I don't know if I can sustain you folks until December, but these reports will at least help you to get to that first trailer.

Before I leave, I want to give you a small teaser of what you'll see in these reports. I've seen Legolas kill lots of Orcs from a perspective I never imagined I would. Then there's chatting with Hobbits as they get their hair teased and feet checked. I saw special effects history being made a couple weeks ago... The Great Eye has been upon me. I totally conquered the embarrassing geek inside me by not asking Hugo Weaving to say "Mr. Anderson." There are fights, killings and horse play to be told about. Sets... everything from Minis Tirith to Mordor to Rivendell to Shelob's impressive Lair.

Lots to come, squirties. I must now depart. The call of Dracula has reached my ears. Time to partake in the festivities of May Day... Shall I be the Fool or the horse-man? Only time will tell.

I wish all you American friends the best on our country's Birthday. I will return shortly with my first full report. 'Til that day this is Quint bidding you all a fond farewell and adieu.

-Quint email:

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