Hey, everyone. "Moriarty" here with some Rumblings From The Lab.
Here’s a brand-new reviewer from the UK with two peeks at upcoming films. I pity the fool who don’t read these reviews!!
Hi Harry,
This is the first time I've ever attempted to review a film in words so please be gentle. I'm crap with remembering character names and film crew members so I'm sorry.
I have just got back from a screening at London's Empire theatre of Bond's latest outing "Die Another Day" and Joel "Let's pretend I never made Batman and Robin" Schumacher's "Phone Booth" courtesy of 20th Century Fox. They also showed us a bunch of trailers for forthcoming movies including X-Men 2 (X2), Just Married, Daredevil and some other shit. Non were particularly exciting so I won't talk about them except to say that Down With Love, with Renee Zellwegger and Ewan McGregor, looks like it could be a sleeper hit (it is a kind of Austin Powers spy-sex comedy without the spy stuff). Now unfortunately despite my best efforts to get to London on time by leaving my house at 5:45am for a 10:30am start I, alas, managed to still be late by 1hr and 15 minutes due to some very heavy traffic on the M1. My entire journey one way was about 130 miles of which three hours of the journey were spent doing the last 25 miles.
So road rage fuelled and bladder explodingly fucked off, I and my friend trotted up to Empire 1 (their big, big screen) and watched the remainder of "Die Another Day". Now what I discovered was how easy it was to pick up what had actually taken place for the previous hour or so of the movie which, to me, suggests a distinct lack of plot. From what I could gather, Mr. Brosnan was tortured in Korea for a long, long time after being betrayed by a mysterious person who blew his cover. Of course as he is Bond, he escapes and sets about exacting his revenge whilst also dealing with some plot involving gene therapy gone slightly wrong, a dastardly Dr. Evil type plan involving a large frickin' space mirror to bring extra sunlight to the world but which could be manipulated into one giant mother of a weapon, and also some guy with Diamonds embedded into his face. Of course, as I missed all the scenes which established all this, I didn't really care about anything other than what the action sequences were going to be like. And to sum it up, they were excellent....for a Bond film..
Perhaps I'm being unfair, after all, this is a Bond film like no other. Forty years in the business and it looks like this time they've spent a few extra quid and used it wisely on explosives, ice machines, more explosives, and Halle Berry's tight-fitting wardrobe (By the way, she's very tasty in this movie and I was gutted that I missed the "what a magnificent view" scene. At least I have my dreams). There is loads and loads of action in the hour which I saw. I was most impressed with a scene involving Pierce Brosnan having to save poor Miss. Berry from a bunch of deadly lazers only to have the machine go berserk and start firing lazers all over the place whilst a fight ensues between Bond and a baddy.
Also, the finale which is (minor spoiler ahead) set on an airplane which is plummeting down to earth with our super spies on board is quite exciting and most violent when it comes to the welcome disposal of the bad guy (the British one). But as an action film (which it could be argued that it is not and is more of an espionage thriller) it falls flat as the sequences are no where near as memorable as if James Cameron got his hands on the movie. The sequences are loud, inventive, but ultimately dull. When they do actually get REALLY good, they are let down by some dodgy special effects work (check out the scene where Brosnan is surfing to see what I mean) which still surpass any other Bond film in terms of quality, yet are still below par for a blockbuster.
Going back to what I said about violence, this is probably the most violent Bond pic made yet. The director seemed to like disposing of people with knives and swords throughout the course of the film, as well as occasionally having severed hands and the usual gunshot victims. Don't get me wrong, this ain't Reservoir Dogs, but it also ain't for the kiddie’s. It's also filled with dirty one liners which the crowd loved ("At least we'll go down together") but which Bond film isn't?
Acting was top notch with the exception of the British bad guy (whose name I can't remember) who simply got on my tits from the start (well, from the point I started watching) and never quite got off them. He was smarmy, arrogant, ugly, and worst of all British. Now don't kill me, I'm British and what I hate about him is the "Queen's English" way he speaks. I hate hearing that shit in movies. When I watched "The Others" I wanted to smother the two children with a pillow - lucky for them their mother beat me to it.
To sum up, I'd give this movie 4/5 which could possibly go higher or lower once I've checked out the first hour. I doubt very much that the score could go higher (I rarely give anything a 5) but it will most likely remain a "4" which is tremendous as despite it flaws, it was hugely entertaining for a "non-Bond fan" like myself. Plus, it's a damn site better than xXx which was simply shit.
The other movie which I watched today was Phone Booth. Most of you have probably heard of this film by now but in case you don't, the story revolves around Colin "Minority Report" Farrell being trapped in a phone booth by a sniper who'll blow his brains out if he hangs up the phone. With recent events in the US, it is understandable that Fox have pulled it's release date out of sensitivity for the victims families, but once it is released BOY YOU ARE IN FOR A TREAT!
Now bear in mind, the director of the film directed the awful Batman Forever and the diabolical follow-up (and possibly worst film ever) Batman and Robin which had the Dark Knight's fans fuming with murderous rage after he completely shit on the series. However, whilst in exile, Mr. Schumacher made himself a small war film called Tigerland in which he cast a unknown actor Colin Farrell as one of the troops. The film was critically acclaimed and put Mr. Schumacher back on the road to directorial greatness. And obviously, it introduced him to his leading actor for Phone Booth.
Colin Farrell excels in his performance as a busy PR Manager who lies his way through life in order to convey "a good image" to his clients. What works so well in this film is that practically everything you learn about him comes from the conversations he has with the psycho sniper (Kiether Sutherland) over the phone. His character is put under the microscope by the sniper who seems to know everything about his victim, taking great pleasure in playing mind games and getting him to expose things about himself that he didn't want to. Kiether Sutherland is brilliantly funny and twisted as the sniper and gives a great VOCAL performance. If you're expecting to see him much, you'll be very disappointed.
As for the story itself, there's only an initial five minutes of "set-up" and then Farrell is stuck in that Phone Booth for the next 80 or so minutes. And we don't cut away from him neither. It sounds crap don't it? Trust me, it's not. I was amazed at how the movie held mine (and audiences') complete attention throughout. Never was there a dull moment. The revelations come fast and thick as do the witty one liners from both Farrell and Sutherland. This is the kind of movie which doesn't have a big plot as it doesn't need one. Like "Speed", the set-up up is simple and the rest is character and action driven. The action unfolds via "picture in picture" style so that are focus remains with Farrell, yet allows us to see other events such as the arrival of the police and the snipers malicious calls to Farrells girlfriends (yes, girlfriendsss).
The violence level in this movie was surprisingly low but it made up for a lack of blood by a generous use of the "f-word". And no, I don't mean "fart". According to the guys at 20th Century Fox, this movie was shot in only 10 days which I'm sure the crew of Lord Of The Rings would have had wet dreams about. However, after watching the movie you can see how they would have achieved this as the movie is practically in real time after the point he picks up that phone and, as I've said, concentrates on him and his emotions.
Anyway, that's all I can say about this movie as I will spoil it for you otherwise. Let's hope it gets released soon as I want to see if it can stand up to repeat viewing.
My rating 4.5/5 (damn good)
Overall, my day was worth the 300 mile round trip (I got a little lost on the way back) and the early morning start to the day. It's nice to actually be one of the first people to see a film rather than one of the last which happens o-so-often for us UK folk.
Anyway, that's me done.
Mr. T.
Nice first time at bat, Mr. T! Thanks!
"Moriarty" out.
