Harry here... I decided to stay at home and rewatch NIGHTBREED on DVD and play with my SideShowToys DARK CRYSTAL toys and talk about the future of digital cinema for hours on the phone. Why? Because the alternative was watching MURDER BY NUMBER... And life is too short, ya know? I just couldn't motivate to see this. Instead I went shopping, ate a decent meal and recorded my Radio Show. MURDER BY NUMBER. Here's Massawyrm.... take pity on him... he took one for the team.
Hola all. Everyone's favorite Chain-smoking, indie schilling, Dr. Pepper swilling madman here with a look at two movies showing at exactly the same time, in the exact same theater with the exact same name. I'm of course talking about the new thriller "Murder by Number"; and don't worry folks, this one really is a thriller.
So what's with there being 2 Murder by numbers? Well, it's like this:
One film is a genuinely creepy look at two teenagers who become obsessed with a perverted version of Nietzsche's theory of the Will to Power and feel that to truly be free they must commit crimes, freeing themselves from the constraints of society and living by their own urges. Between these two exists a deeply complex relationship driven by the rich performances of Ryan Gosling (Remember the Titans) and Michael Pitt (Hedwig and the Angry Inch) who both prove that they are well on their way to fine careers in their own right. There's a strong undercurrent of dysfunction and subtle homoeroticism covered by varying degrees of overconfidence illustrating very succinctly their adherence to Nietzsche. When a romantic interest enters the picture things begin to unravel as the police slowly start to catch on to their game.
The second film, which is intercut with the first, is a completely trite, contrived, done to death cop film starring Sandra Bullock as an omniscient anti-social cop who can't seem to keep a partner, can't seem to maintain a healthy relationship and can't seem to convince her captain that despite all the evidence pointing the opposite way, the killers are really these two high school kids. All the while Sandra has to juggle hanging out on her houseboat, breaking in a new rookie partner and harboring a dark secret past that won't leave her alone. Yeah, it's the houseboat that made me sigh too. This film has no complexity, is composed entirely cardboard characters and genuinely bores you to tears while you wait to get back to the first movie.
The problem is that these two films actually intersect and we can't watch one without being subjected to the other. Damn Sandra Bullock and her characters omniscience! Why can't she just let it go? Why can't she look at the evidence like all of the other police and be satisfied with the findings? Where do these sudden bursts of inspiration come from? Certainly not from clues. It comes from her gut and that makes her annoying. It's like she said "Well, I read the script and I am after all one of the producers so why can't I know what happened on page twelve? It's obviously those punk kids and that meddling dog." Damn her "I don't care what the evidence says, I'm going to construct a circumstantial case against these kids despite what my boss says"!
You see, there is this beautiful relationship constructed between the two boys. It's enthralling, absolutely captivating. You don't want to take your eyes off these guys for a moment. Something bad is brewing, something that will force them to betray one another. A woman comes between them and things begin to crumble. This carefully crafted relationship is slowly tearing away at the seams. One of them, it seems at the time, will not survive the outcome.
But then the cop has to show up again and spoil things, trying desperately to prove that she's read the script and she's the star of this freaking movie! So on she trots, a lifeless Ben Chaplin in tow as her partner, juggling that dark secret and trying as hard as she can to ruin our enjoyment of the good movie that keeps popping up between bouts of her crappy one. It's just impossible to really care about Sandra Bullocks character. It's not that Sandra is bad, it's that the script for her segments is. There is almost nothing but convention to this portion of the film. Ben Chaplin has absolutely nothing to do except act as Bullocks conscience, slowly revealing her dark MYSTEEEEEEERRRREEEEEEEOOOOUUUSSSSS secret that's supposed to give her depth and explain her burst of omniscience for the crime.
Here's the real problem. Sandra plays what is supposed to be a tough woman. Perceived as a bitch and obviously compensating for this dark secret, she is rough around the edges and is clearly her own women. Only, she's written as if she's actually a man. She doesn't come across as strong. She's just comes across as if Sandra Bullock was actually just supposed to be a man. And we simply don't care. Don't get me wrong, I love solid, strong woman characters; it's just that Bullock's performance in Miss Congeniality was a much more potent version of feminism than this lame mockery of woman's lib.
However, I must say the films best moment comes at the hands of all of Bullock's interference when Ben Chaplin and Ryan Gosling are battling it out during an interrogation. Ryan Gosling shows this perfect moment of weakness that is just perfect. This is one of those great "Oh fuck" moment that kicks the movies tension up a notch and makes a betrayal seem all the more likely. I don't want to reveal too much, but that moment is well worth enduring all of the cop movie rehash to see.
The movie moves along to a nicely planned climax that really leaves you wondering who's going to screw who over first and while some people may find it predictable, it will leave most on the edge of their seats. All in all I enjoyed the film for all the segments of Gosling, Pitt and the "God why can't she be legal?" Girl of the week Agnes Bruckner. My only wish is that someone had read this script and said "Hey, lets lose the cops as primary characters and have them be minor shadows who pop up to spook the murderous little fucks and construct an ending that focuses on the boys rather than the cop." Man that would have been a fantastic freaking film.
If you're the type of person who loves standard (here we go with the obvious slung catch phrase for bombing this movie you'll no doubt hear half a dozen more times this week) paint by numbers thrillers, then you'll probably really like this. Otherwise, wait for the DVD on this one to check out Pitt and Gosling's performances.
Until next time friends, smoke 'em if ya got 'em. I know I will.
