Father Geek here with our African reporting crew for the latest edition of the regular Africa-AICN Friday column. SOTHA's got his TOP 10 List for you and Rigobert Song has another of his wonderful, thoughtful reviews, so we'll get right to it...

DR.SOTHA back at the labs after a 10-day lay-off.

It’s not often a person like Doctor Sherobi calls, and offers up his 20-acre pad in Zimbabwe for a week and a half of psycho-sexual experimentation. So when it happens you don’t say no. ‘Grateful’ is not the right word, but it’s the first word that comes to mind. Sherobi left a castle full of penetratory and exitory gadgets that I could use for the good of mankind, and of-course myself. The full report of findings, breakthroughs, and blow by blow climaxes will be published along with my memoirs 40 years after my death (a stupid clause my rat lawyer put in.)

But enough about that, here are my top 10 films of 2001:

1. Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings (I know I know, a real shocker, but this truly was the total filmgoing experience, and one that I will cherish long after my memoir clause runs out. Raises the bar for filmmakers everywhere.)

2. Apocalypse Now: Redux (Watching this on the beach in Cannes with close to 5000 patrons sprawled on the sand mesmerized by Coppola’s madness and brilliance was awesome…After watching this magnum opus, I’m just going to pretend Coppola never made ‘Jack’ or ‘Peggy Sue Got Married’ and instead has been gearing up all this time to make ‘Megalopolis’.

3. AMELIE (Cairo who? Jeunet has made the best romantic drama disguised as a science-fiction film ever. Coincidentally Audrey Tatou makes the top 10 on another of my lists. Most lusted after.)

4. AMORES PERROS (Storytelling of the highest order. Brutal, relentless and as high octane a film as you’re ever likely to see.)

5. MEMENTO (This gave me the same adrenaline rush that ‘Run Lola Run’ gave me a year before. Impeccably structured and flawlessly acted. Guy Pierce should get nominated but he won’t.)

6. DOWN FROM THE MOUNTAIN (The most genuine and ‘real’ documentary to come around in years. Characters that affect you long after you’ve seen the film. Mesmerized by their honesty and sincerity. D.A. Pennebaker is a legend in my mind.)

7. THE MAN WHO WASN’T THERE (A perfect Coen Brother’s movie, but aren’t they always. Saw this one in Cannes with Harry, and I remember we both had big fat smiles plastered on our faces as the lights came up. I hope Angelina Jolie’s husband gets a nomination for this.)

8. GOSFORD PARK (Altman is back, and he nails this upstairs-downstairs period piece mystery. It’s his best since ‘Short Cuts’. Richly textured with a wonderful array of characters crafted by writer Julian Fellowes. ‘Comeback’ is not the right word, but it’s the first word that comes to mind.)

9. THE GIRL WHO SOLD THE SUN (Best African film of the past 5 years. It scarcely got the recognition that it deserved. Mambety is still the greatest filmmaker to ever come out of Africa.)

10. SEXY BEAST (Underrated upon its release) A sublime character driven gangster film, with a note perfect performance from Ben Kingsley. Kudos also to first time filmmaker Jonathan Glazer for not taking the Guy Ritchie route.)

Not that anybody cares, but my list may change upon viewing The Royal Tennenbaums, Vanilla Sky, In The Bedroom, Shaolin Soccer, Ridley Scott’s latest…and I still haven’t seen MADE by Favreau. Why isn’t this making anybody’s list? It sounded money.

Sadly not a lot of news coming out of Africa the past 2 weeks. Everybody winding down, but I’m sure next week will be different. As always there’s still a great Rigobert Song review to tide you motherfuckers over.

Remember to send your cardiac arrest calendars to africaaicn@hotmail.com

SOUTH AFRICA

* Charlize Theron has been snapped smoking from a homemade apple bong - during a pool party at her Los Angeles home. The actress is pictured lighting the top of the homemade pipe and inhaling the contents deeply, before screaming in an attack of the giggles. An eyewitness at the party says, "I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw Charlize and her friends pass round an apple they were using as a bong. She was using a lighter to ignite what they put in the top of the apple. She sucked the smoke from a hole on the side of the apple, coughed a bit, started giggling hysterically, and then passed the apple bong to her friends. Hippies in the 1960s used to smoke pot out of apples all the time, and my guess was that Charlize's Granny Smith was filled with something other than tobacco since she was already smoking a cigarette." Theron's publicist Heidi Schaeffer had "no comment" on the event. (Okay so it’s a slow news week. Pardon me. – DR.SOTHA)

NORTH AFRICA

* Rigobert Song back after his festive break:

Hello Readers. Hope you had a good Christmas and happy end of year. I hope that 2002 marks the year that some great African films break out to the rest of the world. These films are too often marginalised and don’t get the attention they deserve. The world needs to shake off the image of Africa as a destitute Third World continent, and start warming to its charms. "LE GRAND BLANC DE LAMBARENE" is the perfect example – a poignant message beautifully crafted by expert filmmaking. Remember to email me at rigobertsong@hotmail.com with your comments on African film.

Le Grand Blanc de Lambarene – Directed by Bassek ba Kobhio 93 minutes -- Cameroon/France in French with English subtitles

Cameroonian filmmaker Bassek ba Kobhio provides a fascinating revisionist perspective on Albert Schweitzer, Noble Peace Prize winner and secular saint of the colonial era.

Like ‘Framtz Fanon: Black Skin, White Mask’ and ‘Rouch in Reverse’, this film begins to rewrite the history of colonialism from the point of view of the colonized. Le Grand Blanc de Lambaréné is not, however, a superficial exercise in iconoclasm but rather a deeply-felt lament for a missed opportunity, for a cross-cultural encounter between Africa and Europe which never happened.

Shot on the site of Schweitzer's hospital in Gabon, Bassek ba Kobhio elicits psychologically complex portrayals from his actors as he did in his earlier release, ‘Sango Malo’. Behind Schweitzer's impenetrable reserve, Ba Kobhio discovers a man blinded to the people around him by his own spiritual self-absorption and arrogance. For Schweitzer to see himself as a stern but loving father, he had to cast Africans as childlike primitives whom he could protect from the temptations of modernity. He even refused to install electrical generators or institute modern sanitation in his hospital's wards. In the film, an African boy Schweitzer discouraged from becoming a doctor, returns with his degree and rebukes him: "The independence of the people has never been your concern. You only wanted to share their hell in the hope of reaching your heaven."

The film reveals that the ultimate tragedy of colonialism may have been its refusal to see and value the colonized as autonomous, creative human beings. Schweitzer knew numerous European languages but never learned to speak the local tongue; he was an accomplished organist and Bach scholar who never evinced any interest in African music. Ba Kobhio represents the richness of Africa through Bissa, a beautiful concubine the local chief gives le Grand Blanc. Though clearly tempted, Schweitzer remains aloof; only at his death does he invite her to sleep in his bed rather than on a mat. The film's epigraph, ironically, is a famous remark by Schweitzer himself: "All we can do is allow others to discover us, as we discover them."

Some quotes to wet your appetite:

"Audacious...The filmmaker presents the story of Schweitzer from an incisive, intellectually provocative point of view."--Le Monde --

Challenging...Per! iod detail is painstakingly recreated to present an utterly unromantic view of colonial Africa." --Variety

AFRICAN AMERICAN

* Halle Berry jetted to London for a very special lunch - to accept the role of Bond girl Jinx in the new 007 adventure. Halle was handed the role last week, but had to fly to London days later for a power lunch to discuss the character. She says, "It was a business lunch. I wanted to know more about the character - she can kick some butt, she's tough, not a wimpy Bond woman. She's pretty feisty." And Halle admits she did have one idea for her character's name before she discovered it would be Jinx - Liquor License. (How about ‘Chocolate Mousse’? – DR.SOTHA)

* Halle Berry had an out-of-body experience while watching her first full-frontal love scene with Billy Bob Thornton in Monster’s Ball. The actress was more terrified about watching the scene than actually being in it, but the experience turned out well. She says, "I had an out-of-body experience because I was able to see the sex scene and not see myself - I was able to watch it and go, 'Wow, look at her.' I didn't say, 'Oh my God, look at me.' I could really disconnect from it and really be into that character." Halle demanded studio chiefs behind the new movie screen it privately for herself and husband Eric Benet. She explains, "I didn't think it would be fair the night of the premiere for him to see it for the first time and have everyone say, 'So, what do you think?' I thought he should go and see it out of respect for him and, honestly, he really didn't like it too much. It's hard to watch. He's a red-! blooded man and I don't think any red-blooded man wants to see his wife like that but at the end of the movie he was able to say I'm proud of you, you took a risk and no matter what people think about it you followed your heart. I sat behind him. After the scene he did excuse himself for five minutes - probably to throw up. He was far from excited. I'm married to a very secure man." (Let me just say that I’m proud of you too Halle – DR.SOTHA)

* More Halle Berry for you adolescent hounds: Michael Madsen is negotiating to star in MGM's latest, still-untitled installment of its James Bond franchise as well as Miramax's "Kill Bill" for writer-director Quentin Tarantino. Additionally, Madsen plans to star in several indie features, including "Blueberry," a live-action feature based on the series of French comic books of the same name to be directed by Jan Kounen ("Dobermann"). The Bond feature, which Madsen will shoot in February, will see the actor play Falco, a rogue CIA agent. The project, written by Neil Purvis and Robert Wade, also stars Pierce Brosnan, John Cleese, Judi Dench, HALLE BERRY and Rick Yune. Barbara Broccoli and Michael G. Wilson produce.

* Novelist John Grisham refuses to have Will Smith star in the big screen adaption of his latest book - even though his rejection is jeopardising the movie. According to an inside source for the Page Six website, the 46-year-old penman's hostility to having ‘Ali’ star Will as the leading man in The Runaway Jury means the entire project could be scrapped. The source says the author's prejudices extend to all big-name Hollywood actors, explaining, "Grisham hated having Denzel Washington in ‘The Pelican Brief’, even though the movie was a success." The 1993 picture grossed $100 million in America alone. But Smith's spokesman Stan Rosenfield insists Grisham's opinion has nothing to do with Will's failure to sign on the dotted line. He says, "Will Smith wasn't ready to commit to the project. There were differences of a creative nature. There were too many issues that were not acceptable." The source maintains that it was Grisham's frustration with having his pref! erences ignored before that made him insist on casting approval for The Runaway Jury. The project has languished in development since the book came out in 1996, when it was optioned by New Regency for $5 million. Sean Connery and Ed Norton have both been attached to the project, as well as directors Joel Schumacher and Philip Kaufman. (cough prejudice cough – DR.SOTHA)

* Mariah Carey is set for a bumper $50 million payoff from Virgin to quit the label. The star's lawyers have agreed to the deal, which would see her become a free agent, according to the New York Post newspaper. Carey currently has a $100 million, five-album contract with Virgin, which is owned by EMI. She signed the record- breaking deal last year. Ending the contract would mean she will be paid for just nine months of work. Carey left her previous label, Sony, after a fall-out with her ex-husband Tommy Mottola, president of the firm's music entertainment division. Her latest album ‘Glitter’ sold just two million copies worldwide, a relative flop for a singer who has seen two of her albums pass the 10 million mark in America. The film of the same name took only $4.2 million at the box office. Glitter was released in America just weeks after she checked into a hospital in New York to be treated for what was described as a "breakdown". (Gee, nobody saw that coming –! DR.SOTHA)

* Barred by the major networks and the Motion Picture Association of America from mentioning marijuana in TV commercials for its pothead film ‘How High’, Universal has been using "guerrilla marketing tactics" to promote the film on the streets, the Wall Street Journal reported. (The movie itself also promotes Universal Music's hip-hop stars, Method Man and Redman who have, in turn, been boosting the film during a 20-city concert tour. An MPAA spokesman told the newspaper that Universal "had a hard time getting their advertising materials approved," since the organization bars all depictions of drug use. The film is received downer reviews, with Mike Clark in USA Today remarking that it lacks "the redeeming social value of a cockfight."

DR.SOTHA REVO & OUT