Well, depending how ya feel on Van Damme this news is either great or horrible, but I figure I'll stay mute... I can't I can't!!! I hate Van Damme, no I love him... I see all his films and howl with laughter at the funny fella. Anyway, Nick Fury is waving his gun around, so I better let him talk..
Yo, Harry, Nick back and reporting for duty, yet again. Sheez! So many reports, you'd think that I'm your slave. Maybe Harry Knowles is really the head of the SHIELD directorate, and not this eye patch wearin', Hasselhoff- ass-kicking old marine...
So this bit is to report that EDWARD (Judge Dredd, The Crow, etc.) PRESSMAN is doing a MUTANT CHRONICLES movie, with JEAN CLAUDE VAN DAMME starring. The Mutant Chronicles is a role playing game that came out in the 1980s--it's actually called WARHAMMER 40K. They're one and the same. ROGER CHRISTIAN is set to direct.
So the flavor of the Mutant Chronicles is preserved--in the future, there are warring factions of humans that control the earth, each one is a massive mega- corporation (one is American, another English, another German, the fourth Japanese). When ALAKHAI, an evil force, is unleashed from a massive tomb (actually an endless well), it begins to take over the planet by creating NECROMUTANTS. They're like fast-moving zombies.
So Van Damme plays MITCH, right hand man to commando NATHAN. When humanity decides to vacate earth and flee to Mars because they're losing the war, Mitch gives Nathan up for dead. But then he learns that Nathan had a SWORD which crowned him the MESSIAH, a guy who could save the entire world. Now Mitch has to go back to earth, over-run with Necromutants, and find Nathan still alive, get him the sword, and help him save the earth.
The material can best be described as ALIENS meets EVIL DEAD. Mitch is one of a group of commandos that end up blowing to bits lots of Necromutants. Say it with me, Harry--coooooooooolll!
The story has an epic scope, lots of FX, and if the effects house doesn't suck, great production value. The plot and the characters are a bit simplistic, though, even for a Van Damme movie (I'm not a fan). Maybe it will be cool, or maybe the story and characters will suck like EVENT HORIZON. Who knows.
Thought you'd enjoy this tidbit. Nick Fury over and out.
